Just for today
Anyone who has been involved with or around anyone who is involved with the 12-step recovery program first founded by Dr. Bob and Bill W. are familiar with the phrase “just for today. It was and is a brilliant reminder that in seeking to accomplish any large task one needs to break down the task into small steps which one can envision and one can then accomplish. For example, when. I am riding my bike up a steep hill, especially if it is my first spring bike ride, I do not look at the top of the hill. I look at the tree or other marker which is a short distance away. I know I can make it that far. If I focus on the top of the hill I will quickly become discouraged and give up. I am well aware that the top of the hill is there and that I am starting up the hill. For the person beginning an emotional or spiritual journey forever is much too much to envision.
When one has lost a cherished partner or even worse a child, one might be able to envision getting through the next ten minutes . Of course, at another level, one knows that one’s loved one is permanently gone. One might believe one will rejoin one’s loved one’s loved one in heaven or another form but, in this life journey they are gone. Yes, forever is often much too painful to face.
I have a colleague who has been in recovery for alcoholism using the AA program for 46 plus years. He will tell you that is 46 years of one day at a time and sometimes, especially in early recovery, ten minutes at a time. He certainly did not, ever think of not being able to safely drink for 46 plus years.
This concept has serves me well in all aspects of dealing with life on life’s terms. I always know that if I can break down a task into small steps I can accomplish each of those steps. In fact, I often remind myself that are no complicated, difficult tasks. Although I may not have the knowledge, tools or the skills to put a new engine in my car, I know I would be capable of learning how to do that . I might be very slow and clumsy but with the right teacher I could learn how to do that one bolt or part at a time.
This morning I listened to a Ted talk by Eldra Jackson entitled “How to break the cycle of toxic masculinity.” He was in prison serving a long sentence when he was fortunate enough to become a member of a group named Inner Circle where he had the opportunity to identify and examine all the lies he had learned about how to function as a man. The combination of those lies had led step by step to the action which led to his imprisonment. As he step by step discarded and/or corrected those lies he claimed the man he is today; a man of whom he is proud.
All of us can benefit from this approach to all of life’s journey. Just for today, one step at a time we can accomplish what might have seem impossible when focusing on the end goal. Of course, as the 12-step program also reminds us together we accomplish much more. Of course, we cannot control other people, places or things. Those are not realistic tasks. We can, just for today., practice unconditional love; one step at a time letting go of expectations or demands that people behave the way we think they should behave before we love them.
Written January 3, 2018
Anyone who has been involved with or around anyone who is involved with the 12-step recovery program first founded by Dr. Bob and Bill W. are familiar with the phrase “just for today. It was and is a brilliant reminder that in seeking to accomplish any large task one needs to break down the task into small steps which one can envision and one can then accomplish. For example, when. I am riding my bike up a steep hill, especially if it is my first spring bike ride, I do not look at the top of the hill. I look at the tree or other marker which is a short distance away. I know I can make it that far. If I focus on the top of the hill I will quickly become discouraged and give up. I am well aware that the top of the hill is there and that I am starting up the hill. For the person beginning an emotional or spiritual journey forever is much too much to envision.
When one has lost a cherished partner or even worse a child, one might be able to envision getting through the next ten minutes . Of course, at another level, one knows that one’s loved one is permanently gone. One might believe one will rejoin one’s loved one’s loved one in heaven or another form but, in this life journey they are gone. Yes, forever is often much too painful to face.
I have a colleague who has been in recovery for alcoholism using the AA program for 46 plus years. He will tell you that is 46 years of one day at a time and sometimes, especially in early recovery, ten minutes at a time. He certainly did not, ever think of not being able to safely drink for 46 plus years.
This concept has serves me well in all aspects of dealing with life on life’s terms. I always know that if I can break down a task into small steps I can accomplish each of those steps. In fact, I often remind myself that are no complicated, difficult tasks. Although I may not have the knowledge, tools or the skills to put a new engine in my car, I know I would be capable of learning how to do that . I might be very slow and clumsy but with the right teacher I could learn how to do that one bolt or part at a time.
This morning I listened to a Ted talk by Eldra Jackson entitled “How to break the cycle of toxic masculinity.” He was in prison serving a long sentence when he was fortunate enough to become a member of a group named Inner Circle where he had the opportunity to identify and examine all the lies he had learned about how to function as a man. The combination of those lies had led step by step to the action which led to his imprisonment. As he step by step discarded and/or corrected those lies he claimed the man he is today; a man of whom he is proud.
All of us can benefit from this approach to all of life’s journey. Just for today, one step at a time we can accomplish what might have seem impossible when focusing on the end goal. Of course, as the 12-step program also reminds us together we accomplish much more. Of course, we cannot control other people, places or things. Those are not realistic tasks. We can, just for today., practice unconditional love; one step at a time letting go of expectations or demands that people behave the way we think they should behave before we love them.
Written January 3, 2018
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