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Sunday Musings - September 1, 2024

8/31/2024

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Sunday Musings - September 1, 2024
 
If we are human, we have hurt others; sometimes in a reactionary way to a real or perceived danger; sometimes planned.  When a hurtful action appears planned it would seem as if the person had a choice.
 
Justice systems in most countries, including the United States, are based on the belief that one has chosen to injure another physically, sexually, emotionally or financially.   Most, if not all, religions are based on the belief that the God who is the head of a particular religion rewards or punishes believers on the basis of their choices.  There may be differences in the beliefs in what behavior is offensive to a God, but the basic model of justice is the same. 
 
We imprison a great many people in the United States because we believe they made a choice to engage in behavior which was hurtful or unjust to another person, community or some other part of the world.
 
In the United States we are extremely adept in holding two competing beliefs.   We believe that mental illness is real and believe all people make choice.  Thus, a great many people with a diagnosed mental illness, including addiction, are in prison.  Although there are some loving medical professionals serving some prisoners, the basic goal of prison is to punish individuals for making bad choices.
 
What if, however, the development and function of the brain is much more complicated?  What if mental illness is real.  “Mental” implies that the brain is involved.  If the brain is involved than the ability to make decisions is affected.  Actually, as I have previously suggested, the distinction between mental and physical is inaccurate.   It is all physical.  A great many parts of the brain have to function in a certain manner in order for a person to make a decision to act.  If any of those parts are impaired or do not communicate well with other parts than one may be unable to access moral or ethical core values; to make a decision in line with those values.  
 
All of us, I am sure, have found that we are more prone to react rather than act when we are tired or not feeling well.  To react is to rely on instincts which generally mean fight or flight.   We may also find we react rather than act when a past trauma is triggered. 
 
We have undoubtedly noticed the brain for some of us is able to remember certain situations and call up a previous response which we then label as a habit    One might talk about habits which are one’s muscle memory.   Thus, in combat, when flying an airplane or engaging in any repeated behavior one may not “think” but do what one has trained oneself to do. One may have noticed that sometimes one “finds” oneself performing an act one had not intended.   For example, if one drives daily or often to a specific location one might intend to drive someplace else and suddenly find oneself at the frequent location.
 
 
 
Sections of the brain which allow one to evaluate a situation and make a decision based on one’s core values are not developed in a young child.   The child also has not internalized core values. The young child reacts with no ability to consider the rights and needs of others.   Authors such as Gabor Mote in his book The Myth of Normal:  Trauma, Illness and Healing in a Toxic Culture suggest that when a child experiences trauma before those parts of the brain are developed it may reduce or hinder the development of brain circuits which allow one the flexibility to make decisions or make choices.  We also know genetics, birth defects, nutrition and other factors affect the development of the brain.   Scientists are researching how a range of other factors may affect the development of the brain and other functions of the body. Screen time, environmental factors, food dyes, war and many others are being examined.
 
Some such as Gabor Mote and Resmaa Menakem (My Grandmother’s Hands: Racialized Trauma and the Pathways to Mending Our Hearts and Bodies)  suggest specific exercises or techniques which one can use to diminish the affect of trauma; even multigenerational trauma.  We know the human body may, at times, be capable of healing.  Some early damage may not be repairable.   One thinks of the many young children living in war torn countries or regions and who have little or no access to food, water or other necessities.   How permanent is their damage?  Many of we health care professional are also familiar with acute mental illness which may be treated, but which leave one vulnerable or restricts one’s functioning one’s entire life.  There are, of course, the exceptions. Some children survive acute trauma and, yet, become highly competent judges, doctors, scientists and other professionals.  
 
The bottom line is that although we know a lot more about “mental” illness and healing from trauma and deprivation, there is much left to learn.  We do know that “choice” is not simple or possible for many individuals. The human brain is dependent on many factors in order to be able to “decide” to act rather than act.  Assuming that everyone is equally able to make a choice to act in a way which considers the needs of others as well as mother earth is profitable for some religious leaders and for industries such as the jail/prison industrial complex.  Such assumptions also make good sound bites for politicians. They are not consistent with what we know about how the human brain functions. Perhaps, if some of us have brain circuitry which have developed to be able to make choices, we can choose to be guided by science, common sense and yes, “love” of others which it turns out is also love of self.
 
Written September 1, 2024
Jimmy F Pickett
coachpickett.org
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 





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Sunday Musings - August 25, 2024

8/25/2024

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Sunday Musings – August 25, 2024


I was never a fan of censorship. This includes the current surge in the effort to ban certain books in schools and public libraries. While I worry about attempts to spread misinformation, I worry even more about not trusting children and teachers to select material children and adults are ready to read and evaluate om their own.  I also worry about the move to pretend as if racism has not been a part of our history or acting as if withholding information about gender and sexuality will add to the health of students.  My experience is children read or explore what they are ready to learn.  Anyone who has raised or taught children know they will let one know when one attempts to give them information than they are not ready to learn.  If, however, one deliberately limits access to the reality of history, science, or other subject areas one is merely brainwashing which is disrespectful and dangerous.
 
If I am going to talk about disrespect it is incumbent on me to attempt to articulate a definition other of respect. 
 
What might be considered respect by many of us?  Perhaps the readier of this blog might agree that to have respect for another person, animal or another part of our environment is to honor the fact we live in an interdependent world or universe.  That is to suggest that every action or inaction affects the entire universe (s).  If that is the case than one must agree that to treat someone or something with disrespect is to act as if one can ignore its importance or the fact that they or it is a gift for which to be grateful.   Many so-called primitive groups of people give some of what they are about to eat or drink back to the earth as a symbol of gratitude as a symbol that one must feed and water the earth if it is to continue to feed one.   Thus, whether taking about plants or animals which may be the source of nourishment, one should gratefully take only what one needs.  One can, of course, debate whether it is moral to kill animals for our human consumption.  One might decide it is immoral to kill an animal for food or one might argue that how one treats the living animal prior to killing is moral or immoral.  Whatever one decides about that issue respect demands that we treat all of creation as important.  One might then agree cannot pretend how one treats another person, the earth itself or animals will not long ter, affect all.  We can, perhaps, forgive humans for making past decisions based on lack of the tools of science or knowledge, but once we have knowledge of we must take responsibility for our actions.
 
One might suggest that to treat another person, animal or plant with respect is to act in self-interest. If, in fact all is interdependent then the negative or abusive treatment of another person, plant or animal affects the entire universe which must then come back to negatively affect the one who originated the negative act.  That seems to be to be axiomatic. 
 
Almost all of us have access to the effect of climate change, to the reality that gender is not, for many, as clear and fixed as we once believed, race and nationality does not determine intelligence or worth, sexual orientation does not determine parenting skills, there is no shortage of sperm for most,  sexuality is fluid in most of nature, there is no justification for lethal killing of others, events do not happen in a vacuum; treating other people or countries as if they exist only for one’s immediate gratification , focusing on the spec in the eye of the neighbor instead of the log in one’s own, and ignoring the limits of resources has dire long term consequences.  Pretending otherwise to children or adults serves no one; is respectful, unkind, cannot be justified.
 
Respect should not be a political or religious issue.  Respect is essential to the future of this planet; to the opportunity for all of nature, including we humans of all ages, to thrive.
 
Written August 25, 2024
Jimmy F Pickett
coachpickett.org
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Sunday Musings - August 18, 2024

8/17/2024

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Sunday Musings - August 18, 2024
It often seems as if many, if not most, of we humans have a difficult time connecting the dots; connecting how events or actions affect and are affected by each other.  Events and actions do not happen in a vacuum. If one does action “A” then one must address or take into consideration the effects of such actions on B to Z.
I was thinking of this as I read an article in the local newspaper about President Biden’s intention to permit the approximately 100000 dreamers (children brought to the United States illegally as children) to enroll in the Affordable Care Act health insurance next year. Fifteen states so far have joined together to file a federal lawsuit against such a rule.
 
 
 
 
(One can google this and find the story on various news sites). 
I find this fascinating. The purpose of this suit seems inconsistent with the stated ethical beliefs of many of these same attorney generals.  The facts as I understand them are:
o   The wife of the Republican candidate for president is an immigrant as are her parents.
o   The wife of the Republican vice President nominee is an immigrant and is a Sikh
o   Both Trump and Vance as well as many politicians and public officials profess to deeply care about:
§  Embryos3 from the time the sperm and egg meet.
§  Biological parents of children no matter what their mental, emotional or spiritual health.
§  The teachings of Jesus.
§  The economy and how it affects the biological parents and children.
 
At the very same time many of these same individuals seem to not:
o   Understand or care that the parents who enter this country after arduous journeys and leaving all they know do so because of their concern for their children whom they want to be able to feed, clothe, provide a safe home, and a chance for a decent future,
o   Favor childcare assistance.
o    Be concerned about the effect of failing to provide for the health care of children.
o   Appreciate that many of these same children and their parents have contributed to the economy of this country often doing back breaking jobs others do not want to do.
To want to take responsibility for the fact that policies of the United States have often affected the environment, economy and the safely of home communities/countries of immigrants - legal and illegal.
o   Becoming a legal citizen of this country especially if one is not the spouse or child of a citizen or is not well connected politically is an arduous process which under the best of circumstances can take an average of ten years.
o   Seem to accept the reality that just because sone people can overcome great hardships many factors which we may not fully comprehend allow some such as VP candidate Vance and others to climb out of the holes of poverty, addiction, violence and other trauma.
o   Providing health care for children will cost local, state and federal government less than not providing it.
o   Be concerned a disproportionate share of childcare still falls upon women in the United States.
o   Know we are a country of immigrants.
o   Know that study after study show immigrants - legal and illegal - commit fewer crimes than those who are already United Citizens. (Goodie many sources to verify this fact.)
If one is willing to connect the dots it should be a no brainer to ensure that heath care for all - citizens, legal immigrants and those forced to become illegals - is a wise investment economically, emotionally and spiritually.  Treating each other well pays positive dividends nationally and internationally.   It is time for common sense and basic decency to dictate political, economic and health care decisions in this country.
If one states that they care about children who eventually, if lucky, become adults, then one must care about their care from conception to the “natural” end of their life journey.
Written August 18, 2024
Jimmy F Pickett
Coachpickett.org
 
 
 
 
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Sunday Musings, August 11, 2024

8/11/2024

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​Sunday Musings - August 11, 2024


Small blessings


I daily write down and share a spiritual intention with several friends.   As I age my spiritual intentions are more focused on what is possible today.  I am increasingly aware this life journey is very brief.  I always “knew” this but at my age I am reminded in real time. We only have this moment to savor the gifts this journey.   These gifts include the many gifts of Mother Nature and the moments with friends - long term friends, new friends and those momentary encounters which may or may not be repeated and may or may not result in ongoing friendships


My friend Kurt and I have a generous, loving friendship of many years.  I appreciate much about him and our friendship, one of which is his willingness to be present for those unexpected moments with people with whom he has no history and who he may never again encounter.  These encounters are free of expectations or any need other than to appreciate the thin slice of each other which is apparent in that moment.   They are enough in and of themselves.  He and I share the joy and gift of such encounters.  We also share a similar joy for such moments with much of Mother Nature, a creation of art whether created by a person or Mother Nature.  This could be a painting, a dance, music, a flower or other plant, the miracle revealed by physics or engineering or the sudden appearance of the city of Pittsburgh as it opens its arms when one exits the Ft. Pitt tunnel at night.  Seemingly the lights of the city all turn on at once.  


When I allow myself to be present and let go of expectations or need for more, I can daily enjoy many such moments.   One of those moments occurred this week when I entered a space where a home inspector, I had hired was inspecting a condo I had planned to purchase.  He said I looked familiar, but I could not remember meeting him.   He later remembered we had met some time ago when he was with another person, we both know.   As we began talking, we discovered we shared similar interests in people and the world in which we live.  A delightful and energetic conversation ensued while he also shared the results of his inspection.   Soon it was time for me to leave and to decide that there were too many potential issues with the condo to consider a purchase.  That was disappointing and required me notifying several people who were going to help make this potential move possible - the bank employees, the movers, the painter.  Yet the experience filled me with joy and appreciation for this person as a fellow human and a competent and kind professional.  The cost of the inspection financially was money well spent and the visit was a gift.   While at this building I also had a moment with a woman I usually see only at social justice events.  As a neighbor she would have been another gift.  I might not see the inspector or the potential neighbor again.   If I do that will be a blessing. If not the value of the gifts of those moments is not lessened.


I could make a long list of such moments; Visits with Penny and the magical garden she and her partner join with Mother Nature and the fairies to create; moments with various people I may only see at the gym. moments with those I have the honor of sharing a healing journey; moments with colleagues; moments  with the owners of a nearby gathering place - a restaurant; moments savoring a particularly good meal; moments at theater productions; moments visiting neighbors while shopping at the green grocer or the supermarket; moments with a scientist I see at Panera’s generous enough to share something of his work; moments sharing sadness, joy, passion, delight, disappointment  and sometimes profound grief and even anger about how  badly we can treat each other.   Moments.


We exist only when we show up for such moments. They are enough.


Written August 11, 2024
Jimmy F Pickett
coachpickett.org’å
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Sunday Musings - August 4, 2024

8/3/2024

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Sunday Musings - August 4, 2024
 
Abuse is abuse is abuse whether that abuse is verbal, emotional, physical, political or sexual.  Abuse is always an instance of someone treating another person or group as less than; as an object to service the needs of the other; an instance of a person being unable to consider or accept the sacredness - the rights - of another.  Abuse is not caused by the person being abused.  It is about the perceived need of the abuser to avoid a pain or painful truth about oneself; the truth of their unresolved pain.  Very frequently the pain the abuser is avoiding or running from originates from them being told or convinced they are not enough; they are not worthy of love and respect.   Thus, the abuser may come to believe that they can relieve their pain by causing others pain. They may believe if they can degrade or otherwise injure another that they will gain worth by proving that they are more powerful.  They may come to believe that if they find a surrogate for their abuser, they can cause more hurt than they feel. They may believe in that way they can change the balance of power and thus protect themselves from further hurt. Often the abuser is unaware of why they are doing what they are doing.  They merely strike out in response to their need to avoid their own panic.   Perhaps they do not even label their pain as pain.  They may be so distant from the source of their own pain or fear they have come to believe that the danger to themselves and/or their family is a racial or religious group or even the history of the treatment of a group. 
 
A theoretical orientation about race which has been codified as the critical race theory has been designed to assuage the perceived discomfort of Caucasians if they must face the reality of racism in this country, the reality of their privileged status.  Many states have passed laws outlawing what is being terms critical race theory. Some of these laws specifically ban the teaching of the history of racism in the United Sates.
 
Some states have also banned or made it illegal to teach about gender, sexual orientation and/or other facts about who we are humans so that some students and many parents do not have to face the reality of who we are as humans.  This reality may conflict with religious or cultural beliefs.
 
Facing our discomfort, no matter what the source, can result in increased discomfort for some.  It can also long term free us to live in community and claim the joy of freedom; the freedom to love and live in harmony with one another; the freedom to work together to create a more loving relationship with each other and mother earth.  Avoid the discomfort of growth leads to abuse of others.
 
Abuse, whether it be physical, emotional, intellectual, spiritual, political or financial can steal the joy of the abuser and the abused.  Often in our attempt to empathize with the abused we may also steal their joy.   We may forget that one response to abuse, in addition to pain, is to hold on to our joy. 
 
In March of 2022, Ketanji Brown Jackson was the subject of confirmation hearings for the position of judge of the Supreme Court of the United States.  Some Senators questioning her attempted to discredit not only her judicial qualifications but her integrity as a person.  One of the most memorable speeches that day was made by Senator Booker. One sentence reminded all who were listening and all who later heard or read the speech, “Nobody’s going to steal that joy.”  He was reminding himself, Ms. Jackson and all her abusers that no amount of abuse can destroy the hope and the joy of those who have endured abuse since racism was invented to justify the unfathomable cruelty of slavery.   Those slaves and descendants have survived and often thrived by holding on to joy while not denying the pain.  Whether working in the fields, caring for the children of their white masters, cooking, cleaning and even dressing the while slave owners, the slaves - the black men, women and children - sang, took care of each other and kept the focus on the promise of the God of their understanding.  Even today in any African American church service or at wakes on can witness deep grief alongside the joy of the belief “We shall overcome.”   
 
One can, as one listens, hear the assurance of Richard Wright’s Bigger Thomas expressing in Native Son, when being threatened by the police persons, “You cannot do nothin but kill me and that ain’t nothin.”
 
We cannot as individuals or a country survive by running from or denying abuse; the abuse of racism, sexism, homophobia, trans oppression, outlawing choice, the attachment to guns, the withholding of health care or any other attempt to limit “all people” to “some people.  We also cannot survive if we succumb to giving away the twin of grief which is joy.
 
Written August 4, 2024
Jimmy F Pickett
coachpickett.org
 
 
 
 
 



 
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    Jimmy Pickett is a life student who happens to be a licensed counselor and an addiction counselor. He is a student of Buddhism with a background of Christianity and a Native American heritage.

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