Attending to that wise inner voice
I am not sure that the muse ever refuses to visit. I do know that there are times when I have thoughts which I am hesitant to put in a blog. These thoughts if published on Facebook and my web page would serve only to be experienced as offensive or mean spirited. I also know that such thoughts block the creative process or any positive thoughts or feelings. Yet, I know until I write down these most unattractive thoughts and feelings the creative and positive thoughts will be under lock and key in my brain. Telling myself to just let go of the unkind and unattractive thoughts will result in them spilling out of my fingers onto the page on which I am writing or, worse, they will tumble out my mouth in a trajectory destined to cover the nearest person(s) or Facebook post. Then I will feel extreme remorse and immediately shop for a pilot who will drop me on a remote island where there are not even animals for me to abuse. Obviously my sins render me unworthy of respect, love or any contact with other living beings.
Another options is to allow myself to verbally vomit on the page via my pen or via the keys on the computer. Others will find they can vomit via the painting tools such as the brush or the scalpel or through a musical instrument. Still others will find themselves choregraphing a dark dance. At times some of these vomit creations will become great works of art. My vomit writing has yet to come close to earning even an honorable mention in a writing contest. As soon as these thoughts have dumped on the page I will send them to the trash bin on the computer or if on paper to the shredder. Now I have access to more positive, creative thoughts.
Many of us do not give ourselves permission to vomit in private or to share with a trusted friend who will just patiently read or listen until we are done. There is no need for a response. As soon as I announce that it is verbal vomit then the person knows the only thing I need is someone to bear witness to the ugliness which is covering up some old hurt, fear or other emotion.
I was just listening to edition of Hidden Brain during which the host, Shankar Vedantam has a conversation with a young man, William, whose dream was realized when he was accepted to Harvard. Prior to starting there he posted some things on line in a group chat with others who had been accepted to Harvard. In his eagerness to be accepted by his new classmates he posted some things in this chat room which Harvard officials decided disqualified him and the others for admittance to Harvard. To his credit, although initially devastated, he used this as a learning experience to pay attention to that inner voice which says something is not right. A part of him knew he was crossing a line just before he posted potentially offensive and hurtful posts. He did eventually get accepted to another college and is excelling.
I suspect most, if not all of us, have this inner voice which tells us not to vomit on someone, not to post that potentially offensive and/or hurtful material on social media or not to send that vomit letter to someone.
The lesson is to honor the feelings or thoughts one has but to not treat them as truth; to resist the temptation to share or dump them on others. This also applies to potentially offensive “jokes” which may be intended as irony or a parody but which may cross a line from which there is no retreating. If we have any doubt about what that inner voice is sharing we need to refrain from taking action and talk to a trusted friend to whom we have given permission to be honest with us.
Written September 12, 2019
Jimmy F Pickett
coachpickett.org
I am not sure that the muse ever refuses to visit. I do know that there are times when I have thoughts which I am hesitant to put in a blog. These thoughts if published on Facebook and my web page would serve only to be experienced as offensive or mean spirited. I also know that such thoughts block the creative process or any positive thoughts or feelings. Yet, I know until I write down these most unattractive thoughts and feelings the creative and positive thoughts will be under lock and key in my brain. Telling myself to just let go of the unkind and unattractive thoughts will result in them spilling out of my fingers onto the page on which I am writing or, worse, they will tumble out my mouth in a trajectory destined to cover the nearest person(s) or Facebook post. Then I will feel extreme remorse and immediately shop for a pilot who will drop me on a remote island where there are not even animals for me to abuse. Obviously my sins render me unworthy of respect, love or any contact with other living beings.
Another options is to allow myself to verbally vomit on the page via my pen or via the keys on the computer. Others will find they can vomit via the painting tools such as the brush or the scalpel or through a musical instrument. Still others will find themselves choregraphing a dark dance. At times some of these vomit creations will become great works of art. My vomit writing has yet to come close to earning even an honorable mention in a writing contest. As soon as these thoughts have dumped on the page I will send them to the trash bin on the computer or if on paper to the shredder. Now I have access to more positive, creative thoughts.
Many of us do not give ourselves permission to vomit in private or to share with a trusted friend who will just patiently read or listen until we are done. There is no need for a response. As soon as I announce that it is verbal vomit then the person knows the only thing I need is someone to bear witness to the ugliness which is covering up some old hurt, fear or other emotion.
I was just listening to edition of Hidden Brain during which the host, Shankar Vedantam has a conversation with a young man, William, whose dream was realized when he was accepted to Harvard. Prior to starting there he posted some things on line in a group chat with others who had been accepted to Harvard. In his eagerness to be accepted by his new classmates he posted some things in this chat room which Harvard officials decided disqualified him and the others for admittance to Harvard. To his credit, although initially devastated, he used this as a learning experience to pay attention to that inner voice which says something is not right. A part of him knew he was crossing a line just before he posted potentially offensive and hurtful posts. He did eventually get accepted to another college and is excelling.
I suspect most, if not all of us, have this inner voice which tells us not to vomit on someone, not to post that potentially offensive and/or hurtful material on social media or not to send that vomit letter to someone.
The lesson is to honor the feelings or thoughts one has but to not treat them as truth; to resist the temptation to share or dump them on others. This also applies to potentially offensive “jokes” which may be intended as irony or a parody but which may cross a line from which there is no retreating. If we have any doubt about what that inner voice is sharing we need to refrain from taking action and talk to a trusted friend to whom we have given permission to be honest with us.
Written September 12, 2019
Jimmy F Pickett
coachpickett.org
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