Costumes de jour
I was sitting in Panera’s the other day typing. Various individuals from many walks of life patronize Panera’s. One can observe a variety of costumes. We all wear our costume de jour for a variety of reasons including:
• Comfort.
• To not stand out in a work or community setting.
• To project a particular role.
• It is the only costume available to one.
• To hide from another person or person.
• To mask pain or grief.
• To be noticed.
• For fun; to make others smile or laugh
My costume de jour is a very traditional male costume for my role as a counselor. it is a shirt, dress slacks and a tie. It has been suggested that the tie was originally a descendant of the more blatant phallic sculptures popular in early Greek culture. In some patriarchal societies - perhaps in most - male genitalia were associated (by males) with power, strength, and authority. Sadly, the language and practices in 2020 continue to often reflect this same power base.
Some of the Panera female customers are apparently on a lunch break or are using Panera’s as their office as am I. Many are wearing business suits with skirts or pants and high heel shoes. There are those who maintain that women’s high heel shoes were originally designed for the same reason that foot binding of women was practiced in some cultures. In fact, a lot of the female costumes - certainly in Western countries - were designed to force the role of what was considered a lady whose ease of movement and overall behavior was restricted by corsets, tight or voluminous skirts, and shoes that made much movement impractical. They kept many women dependent on males for protection, and finances. This costume was accompanied by rules regarding voting, land ownership, ability to travel without a male companion/guard, restrictions on driving, forced marriage and many others. Here in the United States until relatively recently it was considered scandalous and emasculating by many males for females to wear pants, live singly, or worse yet to be financially independent.
In some cultures, the costume de jour for women are designed to hide any feature which might sexually excite a male (or other females). In some of the same cultures the male costumes are more practically designed to accommodate the heat and the cold.
Often the costumes in today’s cultures are designed to identify an association with a sub culture. Sometimes the sub culture becomes the dominant culture. This seems to be true for tattoos. When I was a young man they were associated with those in the United States Navy and those who favored motorcycles. Now a very significant percentage of adults in all segments of the culture proudly display tattoos. it is not usual to see a bride in an elegant wedding gown with very visible tattoos.
Sometimes the costume de jour is intended to distinguish one generation. Such may be the case with some costumes favored by young people. For example, a young father sitting at a socially distant table with his back to me is wearing jean short pants which are worn low to reveal 1/3 of his posterior; the crack of his posterior is clearly visible. I have an old person’s moment and silently wish I was not invited to view his naked posterior. On the other hand, I can recall costumes which I wore for all night dancing which were certainly not designed for comfort or to hide one’s sexuality.
A client of mine is going to court today. He was careful to select a costume which was similar to the one I wear. He wanted the judge and others to see him as a respectable, productive person and not as merely as someone who has struggled with addiction and was caught with illegal drugs on his person.
The original purpose of a costume may no longer be applicable, but it may persist because we have begun to associate it with roles, attractiveness, or to whom we are going to show respect. It will seldom tell us much about the nature of the person’s character traits: honesty, trust worthiness, integrity, history of pain, or history of privilege.
if we are going to create a more equitable and just society we may want to be more aware of the assumptions we make based on costumes. This can be a challenging spiritual practice.
Written July 10, 2020
Jimmy F Pickett
coachpickett.org
I was sitting in Panera’s the other day typing. Various individuals from many walks of life patronize Panera’s. One can observe a variety of costumes. We all wear our costume de jour for a variety of reasons including:
• Comfort.
• To not stand out in a work or community setting.
• To project a particular role.
• It is the only costume available to one.
• To hide from another person or person.
• To mask pain or grief.
• To be noticed.
• For fun; to make others smile or laugh
My costume de jour is a very traditional male costume for my role as a counselor. it is a shirt, dress slacks and a tie. It has been suggested that the tie was originally a descendant of the more blatant phallic sculptures popular in early Greek culture. In some patriarchal societies - perhaps in most - male genitalia were associated (by males) with power, strength, and authority. Sadly, the language and practices in 2020 continue to often reflect this same power base.
Some of the Panera female customers are apparently on a lunch break or are using Panera’s as their office as am I. Many are wearing business suits with skirts or pants and high heel shoes. There are those who maintain that women’s high heel shoes were originally designed for the same reason that foot binding of women was practiced in some cultures. In fact, a lot of the female costumes - certainly in Western countries - were designed to force the role of what was considered a lady whose ease of movement and overall behavior was restricted by corsets, tight or voluminous skirts, and shoes that made much movement impractical. They kept many women dependent on males for protection, and finances. This costume was accompanied by rules regarding voting, land ownership, ability to travel without a male companion/guard, restrictions on driving, forced marriage and many others. Here in the United States until relatively recently it was considered scandalous and emasculating by many males for females to wear pants, live singly, or worse yet to be financially independent.
In some cultures, the costume de jour for women are designed to hide any feature which might sexually excite a male (or other females). In some of the same cultures the male costumes are more practically designed to accommodate the heat and the cold.
Often the costumes in today’s cultures are designed to identify an association with a sub culture. Sometimes the sub culture becomes the dominant culture. This seems to be true for tattoos. When I was a young man they were associated with those in the United States Navy and those who favored motorcycles. Now a very significant percentage of adults in all segments of the culture proudly display tattoos. it is not usual to see a bride in an elegant wedding gown with very visible tattoos.
Sometimes the costume de jour is intended to distinguish one generation. Such may be the case with some costumes favored by young people. For example, a young father sitting at a socially distant table with his back to me is wearing jean short pants which are worn low to reveal 1/3 of his posterior; the crack of his posterior is clearly visible. I have an old person’s moment and silently wish I was not invited to view his naked posterior. On the other hand, I can recall costumes which I wore for all night dancing which were certainly not designed for comfort or to hide one’s sexuality.
A client of mine is going to court today. He was careful to select a costume which was similar to the one I wear. He wanted the judge and others to see him as a respectable, productive person and not as merely as someone who has struggled with addiction and was caught with illegal drugs on his person.
The original purpose of a costume may no longer be applicable, but it may persist because we have begun to associate it with roles, attractiveness, or to whom we are going to show respect. It will seldom tell us much about the nature of the person’s character traits: honesty, trust worthiness, integrity, history of pain, or history of privilege.
if we are going to create a more equitable and just society we may want to be more aware of the assumptions we make based on costumes. This can be a challenging spiritual practice.
Written July 10, 2020
Jimmy F Pickett
coachpickett.org
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