Costuming
Halloween is this week. For many it is an opportunity to have fun exploring parts of oneself which their daily costume does not portray.
Historically, I refer to whatever clothes I am wearing as my costume. Early this morning I wore my gym costume. When seeing clients. I will wear dress trousers, shirt and tie. Friday, I worked in the yard in yet another costume. Saturday night I put on what some call my penguin costume for the Gateway Medical Society Gala in Pittsburgh. Many of the individuals attending this gala wore costumes which hide the scars of racism including the family history of being slaves.
When my son was young, we had great fun selecting and making costumes although I think our best was the elephant costume made of this gray, fuzzy material. When in this costume he was this gentle giant. One of my friend’s young son will be Cookie Monster for Halloween. Another young man has this terrific Super Man costume.
Sometime, as adults, we confuse ourselves and each other with the persona associated with our costume. It is easy to limit ourselves and each other to this one aspect or role. I recall, when attending some training in California, we adults were invited to a center for adult play therapy. At this center was a variety of playground equipment, other toys and boxes of costumes. The goal was to revisit other parts of ourselves which opened us up to be more than we normally allowed ourselves to be. The theory was that if we did this we could be more successful in inviting clients to explore being more than the labels which they had been assigned and which they had accepted. Since we were training to work for/with those with a history of addiction whose family members had become to think of as “just addicts” or “drunks” it was important that we remember that none of us can be contained by such labels.
Friday,x I saw a young man who was grossly underweight, wearing pale skin, sunken eyes, stooped posture, dirty too large jeans and a shirt that barely covered the bones which were protruding from his chest His costume screamed addict. Yet, know that there is a strong, bright, kind young man who likes to love, laugh and be a contributing member of the community. Another friend was taking this young man to facility where he would be able to detox under medical supervision. Although he was fearful of letting go of the illusion of security of his addiction, he did allow his friend to leave him there. I have no idea if we will be able to allow himself to wear a different costume, but I know that he is much more than the addict costume would indicate.
Whether or not we choose to use Halloween to explore parts of ourselves this year, we might remind ourselves that none of us are the costumes or roles we normally wear. We are all much more and perhaps much less that our costumes might portray.
Saturday, I celebrated the penguin. Today? Well, today is full of possibilities.
Written October 28, 2017
Halloween is this week. For many it is an opportunity to have fun exploring parts of oneself which their daily costume does not portray.
Historically, I refer to whatever clothes I am wearing as my costume. Early this morning I wore my gym costume. When seeing clients. I will wear dress trousers, shirt and tie. Friday, I worked in the yard in yet another costume. Saturday night I put on what some call my penguin costume for the Gateway Medical Society Gala in Pittsburgh. Many of the individuals attending this gala wore costumes which hide the scars of racism including the family history of being slaves.
When my son was young, we had great fun selecting and making costumes although I think our best was the elephant costume made of this gray, fuzzy material. When in this costume he was this gentle giant. One of my friend’s young son will be Cookie Monster for Halloween. Another young man has this terrific Super Man costume.
Sometime, as adults, we confuse ourselves and each other with the persona associated with our costume. It is easy to limit ourselves and each other to this one aspect or role. I recall, when attending some training in California, we adults were invited to a center for adult play therapy. At this center was a variety of playground equipment, other toys and boxes of costumes. The goal was to revisit other parts of ourselves which opened us up to be more than we normally allowed ourselves to be. The theory was that if we did this we could be more successful in inviting clients to explore being more than the labels which they had been assigned and which they had accepted. Since we were training to work for/with those with a history of addiction whose family members had become to think of as “just addicts” or “drunks” it was important that we remember that none of us can be contained by such labels.
Friday,x I saw a young man who was grossly underweight, wearing pale skin, sunken eyes, stooped posture, dirty too large jeans and a shirt that barely covered the bones which were protruding from his chest His costume screamed addict. Yet, know that there is a strong, bright, kind young man who likes to love, laugh and be a contributing member of the community. Another friend was taking this young man to facility where he would be able to detox under medical supervision. Although he was fearful of letting go of the illusion of security of his addiction, he did allow his friend to leave him there. I have no idea if we will be able to allow himself to wear a different costume, but I know that he is much more than the addict costume would indicate.
Whether or not we choose to use Halloween to explore parts of ourselves this year, we might remind ourselves that none of us are the costumes or roles we normally wear. We are all much more and perhaps much less that our costumes might portray.
Saturday, I celebrated the penguin. Today? Well, today is full of possibilities.
Written October 28, 2017
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