Another morning when my mind seems a virtual blank. I have been to the gym, had breakfast, sent birthday wishes to my brother Eddie and my friend Kurt. I was “shocked” to realize that my brother Ed is now 72 and Kurt is 55. Just the other day they were both much younger than I. As we age it seems as if the difference in ages keeps shrinking. When one is a young child even three years can seem like a big difference. Now 3 years between my birth and the birth of my brother Ed is nothing. Then there is my friend Kurt who is 20 years younger than I. When I first met him I was in my forties and he was in his twenties. Mercy! That was a huge difference. Now we are fast approaching a time when we will share the same basic stage of life. Many people Kurt’s age are retired.
Soon my brother-in-law Carl will turn 80. That sounds really old but by the time he turns 80 I will have celebrated my 75th birthday.
It is interesting to think that in many respects we are all exactly the same people we were 20, 30 or even 40 years ago. In other ways we have changed. My brother Ed has always been this exceptionally bright, creative man who could envision the creation of a village or a sculpture and then set about bringing it to life. He is also a very kind man who people enjoy being around. Although he and his second wife are separated I think he is always there to help her if needed. He is the perfect host for the restaurant and winery which he owns and runs in Texas. As is true for many in our family he stays very busy and has trouble giving self time off just to visit his children or grandchildren. Yet, if someone truly needs something practical he will be there. In this respect he is a lot like our father. Our father was always helping someone and, in later years after I left home, was great in planning family outings to the lake. Dad’s latest project might have been designing and building a sailboat, making a generator to bring electricity to our home in the country, or designing and building beautiful furniture. When Ed is not building his restaurant, designing and creating the interior, he can be found learning how to make wine or creating wonderful sculptures. He might also, at the same time, be experimenting with hydo farming.
My brother-in-law Carl is like a steady rock. He and my sister got married not long after she graduated from high school. At the time the 3 years difference in their age also seemed like a lot. Carl was, in my experience, a man of few words but lots of action. He worked at a factory near where they lived and together with my sister made this house which became a home in which they raised their three children and which is frequently the family gathering place. He is like a rock. One just knew he would always be there for my sister, their children, grandchildren and great grandchildren. He and my sister have been there for each other when each of them has had serious medical issues. They both always seem to handle life on life terms, no matter what the latest blessing or hardship life tosses their way. One know that Bonnie is safe and well cared for with Carl as he is with her.
My friend Kurt I first met when he was dating a man I know who was active in the local and national organization of men who were committed to providing some leaderships with other men in making the world a safer, more loving and more equal place. Kurt is a nuclear physicist who helps design and implement programs to get rid of nuclear waste. He is also a brilliant and very funny writer as well as a man with an enormous heart. He is quietly present anytime someone needs something. Perhaps, especially since the death of his father, he has been the one who could be depended on by his mother, brother, Aunt Jane as well as a host of friends. The man he was dating when I first met me has been long dead, but he has been with Dr. Marv for many years now. He and Marv are a team based in deep love, shared values, and enormous respect along with a sense of irony and humor about this life journey. They had a commitment ceremony hosted by our circle of friends from the original men’s consciousness raising group. Later they were legally married. Kurt and Marv will fly down on a Saturday in May to take me to dinner for my 75th birthday and then fly back Sunday. He and Marv always find a way to share their generous love.
These are four of the men who continue, each in their way, to inspire me to do my best to show up each day. I am grateful for all four of them. I could say much more about their courage and their gifts. Perhaps I will another time. There are many other men to whom I am enormously grateful, but it is these four who I want to celebrate today. I included Carl because his birthday is soon and he has been much on my mind.
It seems to me that if we want to create a more just and loving world we will take the time to acknowledge and honor the men and women who are our mentors and guides on a day to day, hour to hour basis. Some of them I see more often than others, but all are always present in the way I live my life. I hope to be able to write more about Dr. Marv, George, David, Carl, Fred, Todd, Terry, Dennis, Frank, Jim, Paul, Howard, and many others who are among the mentors in my life. I continue to be very blessed with loving mentors.
Soon my brother-in-law Carl will turn 80. That sounds really old but by the time he turns 80 I will have celebrated my 75th birthday.
It is interesting to think that in many respects we are all exactly the same people we were 20, 30 or even 40 years ago. In other ways we have changed. My brother Ed has always been this exceptionally bright, creative man who could envision the creation of a village or a sculpture and then set about bringing it to life. He is also a very kind man who people enjoy being around. Although he and his second wife are separated I think he is always there to help her if needed. He is the perfect host for the restaurant and winery which he owns and runs in Texas. As is true for many in our family he stays very busy and has trouble giving self time off just to visit his children or grandchildren. Yet, if someone truly needs something practical he will be there. In this respect he is a lot like our father. Our father was always helping someone and, in later years after I left home, was great in planning family outings to the lake. Dad’s latest project might have been designing and building a sailboat, making a generator to bring electricity to our home in the country, or designing and building beautiful furniture. When Ed is not building his restaurant, designing and creating the interior, he can be found learning how to make wine or creating wonderful sculptures. He might also, at the same time, be experimenting with hydo farming.
My brother-in-law Carl is like a steady rock. He and my sister got married not long after she graduated from high school. At the time the 3 years difference in their age also seemed like a lot. Carl was, in my experience, a man of few words but lots of action. He worked at a factory near where they lived and together with my sister made this house which became a home in which they raised their three children and which is frequently the family gathering place. He is like a rock. One just knew he would always be there for my sister, their children, grandchildren and great grandchildren. He and my sister have been there for each other when each of them has had serious medical issues. They both always seem to handle life on life terms, no matter what the latest blessing or hardship life tosses their way. One know that Bonnie is safe and well cared for with Carl as he is with her.
My friend Kurt I first met when he was dating a man I know who was active in the local and national organization of men who were committed to providing some leaderships with other men in making the world a safer, more loving and more equal place. Kurt is a nuclear physicist who helps design and implement programs to get rid of nuclear waste. He is also a brilliant and very funny writer as well as a man with an enormous heart. He is quietly present anytime someone needs something. Perhaps, especially since the death of his father, he has been the one who could be depended on by his mother, brother, Aunt Jane as well as a host of friends. The man he was dating when I first met me has been long dead, but he has been with Dr. Marv for many years now. He and Marv are a team based in deep love, shared values, and enormous respect along with a sense of irony and humor about this life journey. They had a commitment ceremony hosted by our circle of friends from the original men’s consciousness raising group. Later they were legally married. Kurt and Marv will fly down on a Saturday in May to take me to dinner for my 75th birthday and then fly back Sunday. He and Marv always find a way to share their generous love.
These are four of the men who continue, each in their way, to inspire me to do my best to show up each day. I am grateful for all four of them. I could say much more about their courage and their gifts. Perhaps I will another time. There are many other men to whom I am enormously grateful, but it is these four who I want to celebrate today. I included Carl because his birthday is soon and he has been much on my mind.
It seems to me that if we want to create a more just and loving world we will take the time to acknowledge and honor the men and women who are our mentors and guides on a day to day, hour to hour basis. Some of them I see more often than others, but all are always present in the way I live my life. I hope to be able to write more about Dr. Marv, George, David, Carl, Fred, Todd, Terry, Dennis, Frank, Jim, Paul, Howard, and many others who are among the mentors in my life. I continue to be very blessed with loving mentors.
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