Mirror, mirror on the wall…
Many of us will remember the imprisoned spirit of the slave girl which comes to inhabit the magic mirror in the Snow White German folk tale. In the tale the “evil” queen ask the mirror,
Mirror on the wall, who is fairest of them all.” The magic mirror always replies that the queen is the fairest. When the spirit inhabits the mirror and the queen asks who is the fairest, the spirit replies that even though the queen is fair there is one who is fairer, Snow White. The queen orders Snow White killed. The real question the queen was asking, as we all know, “Will you continue to tell me that I am the fairest even if that is not true?” Often many of us keep asking the same question and hoping for a different response. Eventually we might discover or admit that we need to ask a different question. This morning I was listening to a Ted Talk by Tristan Harris entitled “How better tech could protect us from distraction.” As is true for many, if not most of us, Mr. Harris had noticed that he continues to allow the sound announcing a new email or text message to distract him from the task he is attempting to accomplish. Rather than ignoring the sound he, as do most of us, finds himself checking the email or text and then spending another 20 minutes away from the task he on which he had been working. He would ask himself why he did not just ignore the sound. The answer was that he had been reinforcing the habit of attending to the new text or email. In the Ted Talk he is now asking a different question. He is essentially now asking how could one design or make a change to the system which would allow one to essentially put up a “do not disturb” sign so that one would not be notified of incoming text or email until one was ready. He also suggested that the design people could build in an emergency button. Essentially Mr. Harris is suggesting that instead of asking how we can train ourselves to ignore the sound announcing incoming texts or emails, we could ask how the geeks could redesign the announcement process.
The solution sounds simple but all too often we keep asking the same question over and over again and hoping for different results. As with the Queen, if we do not like the results, we resolve to kill the messenger. The queen thought if she killed Snow White the mirror would have to go back to lying to her. It did not occur to the Queen to ask how she could be the most just leader or how she could redefine beauty.
Later in the morning I read an article in the Wall Street Journal entitled “On the Unity of Terror” by Bret Stephens who writes a regular column Global View (July, 5, 2016, A9). In this article he suggests that “terrorism is not the continuation of politics but the negation of it….” Mr. Stephens further suggests that “Terrorism can be defeated, but only once that lesson is learned.” He suggested that, “Understanding its tarfiri version of Islam, with its sweep declaration of apostasy, is essential to understanding how it thinks and operates.” Goodness, what is Mr. Stephens telling us? I could question why Mr. Stephens could not have simply said, “We must understand that the adherents to ISIS believe that their understanding of Islam is the only true understanding which pleases Allah. It is, therefore, their job to destroy all that which is not pleasing to God.” I had to first remind myself of the precise definition of apostasy which to fall away from the truth. Then I needed to remind myself that the word takfiri is derived from the word kafir which is unbeliever.
Whether the issue is:
· terrorism
· the alarming number of high school graduates in this country who cannot read at the 4th grade level
· the increasing disparity between the superrich and the poor
· the negative approach to the presidential primary in the United States
· the increasing credit card debt
the approach to unplanned pregnancies
· the distance between right wing Christians and more liberal Christians
· the extent of life threatening drug addiction
or any other important issues which all thinking, concerned people must address, the questions one asks is of primary importance. If one is asking a question which does not lead to an effective solution because it does not address the core issue or an issue which can be effectively addressed, one will continue to look for, pray , or demand the magic mirror.
I remember years ago someone shared with me a vinyl recording which contained the lead story of an recovering alcoholic, Bert Behanna. She tells the story of attempting to commit suicide and then waking up in the hospital room to find that not only had she failed to make a success of her life, she had messed up or failed her latest suicide attempt. Eventually Ms. Behanna had to quit asking why she could not learn the skills of suicide and ask what it would take for her to learn the skills of living.
Mr. Stephens seems to be suggesting that asking how we can get more money for more bombs to kill more members of ISIS is not going to result in a viable solution. Killing members of ISIS may just create more martyrs. Criticizing the supporters of Mr. Trump or the British citizens who voted to leave the European Union is not going to reduce their passion for their point of view. In other words, asking how we convince those “idiots” of the errors of their ways will not reduce their passion.
All magic mirrors create a temporary illusion or delusion. No, the queen is not the fairest of them all. She could learn to be a more a more just Queen, but she will not become more beautiful.
Whenever I find myself stymied because of repeated attempts to apply the same answer which is not eliminating the problem or even making a significant dent in it may be first clue that it is time to take another look at the question. I may need to quit asking why this solution is not working or start asking how can I approach the problem differently or how I can redefine the problem. Mr. Stephens is suggesting that we begin to ask how we can approach the religious zealot who firmly believes that the God of their understanding is calling them to kill off as many of the “unbelievers” as they can. Mr. Harris is suggesting that instead of asking why we cannot learn to ignore the ping of email and text messages that we ask how we can redesign the alert system.
I could spend hours or days berating myself for being such an idiot! I have known for years that the problem is often the question itself and yet I often spend many fruitless hours attempting to make an answer fit the problem as I have defined it rather than asking how I might restate or redefine the issue. Mirror, mirror on the wall, who is the wisest of them all? The magic mirror tells me, “You are my prince.” Got to love that magic mirror – at least for a minute or ten seconds!
Written July 5, 2016
Many of us will remember the imprisoned spirit of the slave girl which comes to inhabit the magic mirror in the Snow White German folk tale. In the tale the “evil” queen ask the mirror,
Mirror on the wall, who is fairest of them all.” The magic mirror always replies that the queen is the fairest. When the spirit inhabits the mirror and the queen asks who is the fairest, the spirit replies that even though the queen is fair there is one who is fairer, Snow White. The queen orders Snow White killed. The real question the queen was asking, as we all know, “Will you continue to tell me that I am the fairest even if that is not true?” Often many of us keep asking the same question and hoping for a different response. Eventually we might discover or admit that we need to ask a different question. This morning I was listening to a Ted Talk by Tristan Harris entitled “How better tech could protect us from distraction.” As is true for many, if not most of us, Mr. Harris had noticed that he continues to allow the sound announcing a new email or text message to distract him from the task he is attempting to accomplish. Rather than ignoring the sound he, as do most of us, finds himself checking the email or text and then spending another 20 minutes away from the task he on which he had been working. He would ask himself why he did not just ignore the sound. The answer was that he had been reinforcing the habit of attending to the new text or email. In the Ted Talk he is now asking a different question. He is essentially now asking how could one design or make a change to the system which would allow one to essentially put up a “do not disturb” sign so that one would not be notified of incoming text or email until one was ready. He also suggested that the design people could build in an emergency button. Essentially Mr. Harris is suggesting that instead of asking how we can train ourselves to ignore the sound announcing incoming texts or emails, we could ask how the geeks could redesign the announcement process.
The solution sounds simple but all too often we keep asking the same question over and over again and hoping for different results. As with the Queen, if we do not like the results, we resolve to kill the messenger. The queen thought if she killed Snow White the mirror would have to go back to lying to her. It did not occur to the Queen to ask how she could be the most just leader or how she could redefine beauty.
Later in the morning I read an article in the Wall Street Journal entitled “On the Unity of Terror” by Bret Stephens who writes a regular column Global View (July, 5, 2016, A9). In this article he suggests that “terrorism is not the continuation of politics but the negation of it….” Mr. Stephens further suggests that “Terrorism can be defeated, but only once that lesson is learned.” He suggested that, “Understanding its tarfiri version of Islam, with its sweep declaration of apostasy, is essential to understanding how it thinks and operates.” Goodness, what is Mr. Stephens telling us? I could question why Mr. Stephens could not have simply said, “We must understand that the adherents to ISIS believe that their understanding of Islam is the only true understanding which pleases Allah. It is, therefore, their job to destroy all that which is not pleasing to God.” I had to first remind myself of the precise definition of apostasy which to fall away from the truth. Then I needed to remind myself that the word takfiri is derived from the word kafir which is unbeliever.
Whether the issue is:
· terrorism
· the alarming number of high school graduates in this country who cannot read at the 4th grade level
· the increasing disparity between the superrich and the poor
· the negative approach to the presidential primary in the United States
· the increasing credit card debt
the approach to unplanned pregnancies
· the distance between right wing Christians and more liberal Christians
· the extent of life threatening drug addiction
or any other important issues which all thinking, concerned people must address, the questions one asks is of primary importance. If one is asking a question which does not lead to an effective solution because it does not address the core issue or an issue which can be effectively addressed, one will continue to look for, pray , or demand the magic mirror.
I remember years ago someone shared with me a vinyl recording which contained the lead story of an recovering alcoholic, Bert Behanna. She tells the story of attempting to commit suicide and then waking up in the hospital room to find that not only had she failed to make a success of her life, she had messed up or failed her latest suicide attempt. Eventually Ms. Behanna had to quit asking why she could not learn the skills of suicide and ask what it would take for her to learn the skills of living.
Mr. Stephens seems to be suggesting that asking how we can get more money for more bombs to kill more members of ISIS is not going to result in a viable solution. Killing members of ISIS may just create more martyrs. Criticizing the supporters of Mr. Trump or the British citizens who voted to leave the European Union is not going to reduce their passion for their point of view. In other words, asking how we convince those “idiots” of the errors of their ways will not reduce their passion.
All magic mirrors create a temporary illusion or delusion. No, the queen is not the fairest of them all. She could learn to be a more a more just Queen, but she will not become more beautiful.
Whenever I find myself stymied because of repeated attempts to apply the same answer which is not eliminating the problem or even making a significant dent in it may be first clue that it is time to take another look at the question. I may need to quit asking why this solution is not working or start asking how can I approach the problem differently or how I can redefine the problem. Mr. Stephens is suggesting that we begin to ask how we can approach the religious zealot who firmly believes that the God of their understanding is calling them to kill off as many of the “unbelievers” as they can. Mr. Harris is suggesting that instead of asking why we cannot learn to ignore the ping of email and text messages that we ask how we can redesign the alert system.
I could spend hours or days berating myself for being such an idiot! I have known for years that the problem is often the question itself and yet I often spend many fruitless hours attempting to make an answer fit the problem as I have defined it rather than asking how I might restate or redefine the issue. Mirror, mirror on the wall, who is the wisest of them all? The magic mirror tells me, “You are my prince.” Got to love that magic mirror – at least for a minute or ten seconds!
Written July 5, 2016
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