Moving mountains
One of the symptoms of clinical depression, addiction and many other medical issues is self-centeredness. One’s attention is automatically focused on the pain (physical or emotional). Addiction, for example, says that if one gets more alcohol, drugs, sex, things, power, etc. one will feel better. Indeed one does feel better for a brief time. Then one feels worse and has new concerns because of the money needed to support one’s addiction and/or because of the resultant new relationships issues. Depression, anxiety and other mental states lies to one about one’s ability to function and saps one’s energy so that it “feels” as if one cannot function.
Any discomfort, including physical pain, is “normally” a signal from the body that one needs to do something to relieve the discomfort. In the case of chronic conditions, including physical pain one can only safely do so much to lessen the discomfort. If one, for example, takes large doses of pain medication or copious amounts of alcohol one may relieve the discomfort but one will be so out of it that one’s has no quality of life. With treatable pain one’s body tenses up, one gets appropriate treatment, the body begins to heal and to relax. With chronic emotional or physical pain one’s body alerts one but there may be no additional treatment which is safely effective. One then tells that to one’s body, thanks it for the alert and tells the body it is safe to relax. Until that time the body will stay tense. The tenseness increases the area of depth of the pain. Dr. Steve Levine calls this learning to “be with the pain” as opposed to fighting it.
Most often healing from traumatic emotional pain involves facing it, accepting that one cannot change the situation, grieving if needed and moving on. This does not mean one forgets or grieving is every “done” but healing does, in stages, happen. Running from the pain only keeps it in the forefront and creates new issues.
Fortunately there are very effective treatment programs which help one deal with the self-centeredness of addiction and other illnesses,. The problem is , of course, that first the ill person needs to make a healthy decision to seek treatment using a brain which is not healthy. For example, the clinically depressed person is expected to make healthy decisions when the thought process in their brain is telling them that there is not now, never has been, and never will be any reason to trust that one could appreciate and enjoy life; that there is any reason to get off the couch, get out of bed and attempt to take care of oneself or consider the needs of others. Clinical depression leaves one devoid of energy, hope or ability to think. One is in the lowest mode of existence where there is not much, if any desire to survive and often not enough energy to even plan suicide. Making it easier to mandate treatment without creating a criminal record is a matter for thoughtful community debate.
It is important that health care persons and the lay person appreciate and understand that self-centeredness is not a choice that an acutely ill person is making. It is a symptom of some of the illnesses and conditions I have described. We would never say to another person living near mountains, “I expect you to move that mountain before you deserve to be treated with compassion or dignity.” Yet, we all too often expect the person with an illness which affect how their brain works to mentally and emotionally move a mountain; to think clearly, rationally and with a concern for how their thinking and behavior is affecting others.
It is not just the lay person but also health care professionals who have to be reminded that self-centeredness is a symptom and not a choice. All too often I hear health care professionals at every level of education and training say, “The patients just do not want to get well.” Essentially, they are saying, “That patient could move a mountain if they wanted to.”
Written July 19, 2019
Jimmy F Pickett
coachpickett.org
One of the symptoms of clinical depression, addiction and many other medical issues is self-centeredness. One’s attention is automatically focused on the pain (physical or emotional). Addiction, for example, says that if one gets more alcohol, drugs, sex, things, power, etc. one will feel better. Indeed one does feel better for a brief time. Then one feels worse and has new concerns because of the money needed to support one’s addiction and/or because of the resultant new relationships issues. Depression, anxiety and other mental states lies to one about one’s ability to function and saps one’s energy so that it “feels” as if one cannot function.
Any discomfort, including physical pain, is “normally” a signal from the body that one needs to do something to relieve the discomfort. In the case of chronic conditions, including physical pain one can only safely do so much to lessen the discomfort. If one, for example, takes large doses of pain medication or copious amounts of alcohol one may relieve the discomfort but one will be so out of it that one’s has no quality of life. With treatable pain one’s body tenses up, one gets appropriate treatment, the body begins to heal and to relax. With chronic emotional or physical pain one’s body alerts one but there may be no additional treatment which is safely effective. One then tells that to one’s body, thanks it for the alert and tells the body it is safe to relax. Until that time the body will stay tense. The tenseness increases the area of depth of the pain. Dr. Steve Levine calls this learning to “be with the pain” as opposed to fighting it.
Most often healing from traumatic emotional pain involves facing it, accepting that one cannot change the situation, grieving if needed and moving on. This does not mean one forgets or grieving is every “done” but healing does, in stages, happen. Running from the pain only keeps it in the forefront and creates new issues.
Fortunately there are very effective treatment programs which help one deal with the self-centeredness of addiction and other illnesses,. The problem is , of course, that first the ill person needs to make a healthy decision to seek treatment using a brain which is not healthy. For example, the clinically depressed person is expected to make healthy decisions when the thought process in their brain is telling them that there is not now, never has been, and never will be any reason to trust that one could appreciate and enjoy life; that there is any reason to get off the couch, get out of bed and attempt to take care of oneself or consider the needs of others. Clinical depression leaves one devoid of energy, hope or ability to think. One is in the lowest mode of existence where there is not much, if any desire to survive and often not enough energy to even plan suicide. Making it easier to mandate treatment without creating a criminal record is a matter for thoughtful community debate.
It is important that health care persons and the lay person appreciate and understand that self-centeredness is not a choice that an acutely ill person is making. It is a symptom of some of the illnesses and conditions I have described. We would never say to another person living near mountains, “I expect you to move that mountain before you deserve to be treated with compassion or dignity.” Yet, we all too often expect the person with an illness which affect how their brain works to mentally and emotionally move a mountain; to think clearly, rationally and with a concern for how their thinking and behavior is affecting others.
It is not just the lay person but also health care professionals who have to be reminded that self-centeredness is a symptom and not a choice. All too often I hear health care professionals at every level of education and training say, “The patients just do not want to get well.” Essentially, they are saying, “That patient could move a mountain if they wanted to.”
Written July 19, 2019
Jimmy F Pickett
coachpickett.org
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