One and three do not make four
Grandma Fannie was not alone in reminding us children and others that if one was pointing a finger at someone else or some other group – a political party or a religious group – one was simultaneously pointing three fingers back at oneself. Ironically, given that members of religious groups are often the finger pointers, many religious traditions pass along a story to remind one of what Grandma Fannie was attempting to teach. In the Christian religion, one is admonished to “cast out the beam out of thine own eye; and then shalt thou see clearly to cast out the mote out of they brother’s eye.” (Matthew 7:5 KJV).
It sounds like simple and easy advice to follow. Yet, many of us struggle with following it. We do not find it easy to stand up for what we believe important without implying or stating that other opinions are wrong. Sadly, we often see our opinion as the moral or right one and the other view as wrong or immoral. A good example is the differences of opinion about abortion. Those opposing abortion have framed their argument in terms of speaking up for the fetus, which they believe, represents a child from the moment the egg and the sperm begin their dance.
Those advocating for the right of the woman to choose whether to do all they can to nurture the fetus until it is viably a life, which can exist outside the host person, are thinking very differently.
I like this example because, in my mind, it is easy to support both sides of the debate. As a male, of course, I will never be in the position of having to decide whether to carry a fetus to full term.
I sometimes envy those individuals who are sure that they know, without a shadow of a doubt, that their opinion or belief is the right one. It seems to me that life if much easier for those who can point the finger at who or what is right and who or what is wrong.
Yet, the challenge which is attributed to Jesus and many other wise teachers is to focus on being honest about our own sins or ways that we hurt ourselves, others and mother earth. When we have gotten honest about our own behavior/our own humanness and have, when possible, made amends then we can focus on the sins or wrongs of the other person. Many of us are acutely aware that we never reach perfection and, thus, are destined to not reach a point where we can judge or point fingers at others.
Sometimes I think about what it would like to be King Solomon having to decide such a difficult case. I am not at all sure I would have been as creative or confident that neither side would want to child cut in two.
Grandma Fannie was not naïve enough to think that any of us were going to perfect the art or discipline of only looking at our own human tendency to point fingers. She was, however, suggesting that when we notice ourselves judging another – pointing a finger at another – we smile and refocus on being the best person, we can be today.
Thanks Grandma Fannie.
Written January 20, 2018
Grandma Fannie was not alone in reminding us children and others that if one was pointing a finger at someone else or some other group – a political party or a religious group – one was simultaneously pointing three fingers back at oneself. Ironically, given that members of religious groups are often the finger pointers, many religious traditions pass along a story to remind one of what Grandma Fannie was attempting to teach. In the Christian religion, one is admonished to “cast out the beam out of thine own eye; and then shalt thou see clearly to cast out the mote out of they brother’s eye.” (Matthew 7:5 KJV).
It sounds like simple and easy advice to follow. Yet, many of us struggle with following it. We do not find it easy to stand up for what we believe important without implying or stating that other opinions are wrong. Sadly, we often see our opinion as the moral or right one and the other view as wrong or immoral. A good example is the differences of opinion about abortion. Those opposing abortion have framed their argument in terms of speaking up for the fetus, which they believe, represents a child from the moment the egg and the sperm begin their dance.
Those advocating for the right of the woman to choose whether to do all they can to nurture the fetus until it is viably a life, which can exist outside the host person, are thinking very differently.
I like this example because, in my mind, it is easy to support both sides of the debate. As a male, of course, I will never be in the position of having to decide whether to carry a fetus to full term.
I sometimes envy those individuals who are sure that they know, without a shadow of a doubt, that their opinion or belief is the right one. It seems to me that life if much easier for those who can point the finger at who or what is right and who or what is wrong.
Yet, the challenge which is attributed to Jesus and many other wise teachers is to focus on being honest about our own sins or ways that we hurt ourselves, others and mother earth. When we have gotten honest about our own behavior/our own humanness and have, when possible, made amends then we can focus on the sins or wrongs of the other person. Many of us are acutely aware that we never reach perfection and, thus, are destined to not reach a point where we can judge or point fingers at others.
Sometimes I think about what it would like to be King Solomon having to decide such a difficult case. I am not at all sure I would have been as creative or confident that neither side would want to child cut in two.
Grandma Fannie was not naïve enough to think that any of us were going to perfect the art or discipline of only looking at our own human tendency to point fingers. She was, however, suggesting that when we notice ourselves judging another – pointing a finger at another – we smile and refocus on being the best person, we can be today.
Thanks Grandma Fannie.
Written January 20, 2018
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