Opening the doors
Early this morning I listened to the On Being podcast with host Krista Tippett and her conversation guest, the journalist Ta-Nehisi Coates The topic was “Imagining a New America”. As is almost always the case what I most appreciate about Ms. Tippett and her guests is that they ask the tough questions. They do not provide a venue for answers or pretend that there are simple answers to very complex issues. A little later I opened my email to find a note from a friend who shared the fact that last evening he helped one of his children with a homework assignment to write an essay on racism. The whole family got involved in a discussion on racism. He said “Everyone grew last night.” This brought hope to my heart and tears to my eyes.
I have been at a conference all week for training of those of us who work with individuals and families struggling with addictions. One of the sessions I attended yesterday was on “Sex, social media addiction among other addictions and the use of spirituality as prevention and intervention for pathway to recovery.” As I said to the person leading the session, Dr. Jamie Williams, it seems to me the most valuable aspect of the workshop was the fact that a safe place was created to begin a discussion of struggles related to sexual behavior, needs, and addiction. Sexual behavior is often one of those elephants in the room, even among health care professionals as well as those in recovery from addictions. If we are not finding the way to open doors to discussing how we live as sexual beings, our patients and clients certainly are not going to. I was also appreciative that Dr. Williams used language which was inclusive of the LGBT community.
During this conference, there were not any workshops or discussion groups which directly addressed this needs of LGBT individuals despite the fact that homophobia is, in my experience, a daily issue in treatment settings. Sexism and racism are also daily issues in treatment settings. If we are not addressing ongoing racism, homophobia, sexism, and discrimination against those living with sexual addictions then we are not doing our job.
I have to take responsibility for not volunteering to do a workshop on sexual addiction or LGBT issues. I also did not assume any leadership responsibility for asking an African American to challenge us, mostly white people, to address the issues of racism and how that continuing history impacts the lives of African Americans living with addiction.
The workshop led by Dr. Williams was well attended attesting to the fact that health care professional are willing to learn to move past their discomfort or lack of practice in addressing sexual issues with clients.
When we do not assume leadership for asking the tough questions which deeply affect the lives of all living in the United States, we become complicit in the pain which is caused by behavior associated with the constructs of race, gender, sexual orientation, different ableness and age in our country.
As health care professionals, teachers, parents, aunts, uncles, grandparents and neighbors we must open the doors to the questions which matter. If we open the doors in an honest, loving, non-punitive manner children and adults can and will learn that is safe and necessary to address tough, lifesaving issues.
Written September 13, 2019
Jimmy F Pickett
coachpickett.org
Early this morning I listened to the On Being podcast with host Krista Tippett and her conversation guest, the journalist Ta-Nehisi Coates The topic was “Imagining a New America”. As is almost always the case what I most appreciate about Ms. Tippett and her guests is that they ask the tough questions. They do not provide a venue for answers or pretend that there are simple answers to very complex issues. A little later I opened my email to find a note from a friend who shared the fact that last evening he helped one of his children with a homework assignment to write an essay on racism. The whole family got involved in a discussion on racism. He said “Everyone grew last night.” This brought hope to my heart and tears to my eyes.
I have been at a conference all week for training of those of us who work with individuals and families struggling with addictions. One of the sessions I attended yesterday was on “Sex, social media addiction among other addictions and the use of spirituality as prevention and intervention for pathway to recovery.” As I said to the person leading the session, Dr. Jamie Williams, it seems to me the most valuable aspect of the workshop was the fact that a safe place was created to begin a discussion of struggles related to sexual behavior, needs, and addiction. Sexual behavior is often one of those elephants in the room, even among health care professionals as well as those in recovery from addictions. If we are not finding the way to open doors to discussing how we live as sexual beings, our patients and clients certainly are not going to. I was also appreciative that Dr. Williams used language which was inclusive of the LGBT community.
During this conference, there were not any workshops or discussion groups which directly addressed this needs of LGBT individuals despite the fact that homophobia is, in my experience, a daily issue in treatment settings. Sexism and racism are also daily issues in treatment settings. If we are not addressing ongoing racism, homophobia, sexism, and discrimination against those living with sexual addictions then we are not doing our job.
I have to take responsibility for not volunteering to do a workshop on sexual addiction or LGBT issues. I also did not assume any leadership responsibility for asking an African American to challenge us, mostly white people, to address the issues of racism and how that continuing history impacts the lives of African Americans living with addiction.
The workshop led by Dr. Williams was well attended attesting to the fact that health care professional are willing to learn to move past their discomfort or lack of practice in addressing sexual issues with clients.
When we do not assume leadership for asking the tough questions which deeply affect the lives of all living in the United States, we become complicit in the pain which is caused by behavior associated with the constructs of race, gender, sexual orientation, different ableness and age in our country.
As health care professionals, teachers, parents, aunts, uncles, grandparents and neighbors we must open the doors to the questions which matter. If we open the doors in an honest, loving, non-punitive manner children and adults can and will learn that is safe and necessary to address tough, lifesaving issues.
Written September 13, 2019
Jimmy F Pickett
coachpickett.org
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