Our fear of forgiveness; of restorative justice

Our fear of forgiveness; of restorative justice
 
In their NPR Oct 4, 2019 Daily  Jill Hudson and Korva Coleman mentioned in Digging Deeper that the brother of the man shot by Dallas Police officer Amber Guyger forgave and hugged her.   His mother is reported to have said, “I’m proud of my son, Brandt. Your load is lighter.”   The  African American Judge who sentenced her hugged Guyger and handed her a bible.   Some warned “that his grace should not interfere with any investigations into police shootings in the US.  Critics also blasted the African American Judge.”
 
While I did not have access to a television during the trail of Ms. Guyger trial and have no idea of what is in her heart reports of the 911 call she made shortly after the shooting made me think that she knew she had made a tragic mistake.  Although as I recall her first words were fear of losing her job I did not hear any subsequent reports that suggested a history of blatant or overt racism.  Of course, she was and is racist.  No one in this country and from all I read no one in any country is free from some form of negative stereotype by all those who are not them; not a member of their tribe.   In more recent years we have seen a resurgence of such tribal sentiments based on race, ethnicity, religion or other social constructs.   Yet, at the same time there is an increasing awareness that we are a global community.  While I would hope that our learned and very practiced racism would not keep affecting how the police and other public servants do their job, there is no indication that we can separate racism from the job we give police on and off duty.   
 
I would posit that there are a number of steps we can take to  sharply reduce the affects and continuation of discrimination.    These include:

• Quit responding to hate with hate.  Replace retributive justice with restorative justice.
• Replace lethal weapons with non-lethal weapons – stunt guns are not meant to kill but they do occasionally kill.  Guns with bullets designed to kill do exactly what they are designed to do.   
• The only guns designed to kill that make a modicum of sense to me are those designed for hunting game for food for the family.  Perhaps even there we need to listen more to vegetarians.
• Teach empathy from a very early age. 
• Practice distributive justice and procedural justice – if we truly believe that killing is wrong for the “civilian” let make it wrong for everyone. Second either everyone is worthwhile/sacred or no one is.
• Let science determine whether a person really had a choice.
• Do not punish those whose brains are incapable to empathy  or making rational decisions. We may need to restrict the freedom of some to move about.  This can be done with great kindness and humility.
• Teach accountability-  make accountability a safe possibility.
• Practice accountability.  I would, for example, much prefer that Ms. Guyger learn how to help/teach others (1) think before they act (2) identify and change internalized racism. I would love to know what has learned what she can yet learn from this tragic experience.

 
I am frightened of:

• An inability to put ourselves in the shoes of the others.
• An inability to think clearly when in what 12 strep members call HALT state – Hungry, Angry, Lonely Tired.
• Guns designed to kill in the hands of anyone other than those hunting for food.
• People whose brain is impaired because of alcohol or other drugs.
• The conflicting and often contradictory messages we give to law enforcement people about their on and off duty jobs.
• Those fearful of forgiveness.
• Those who confuse forgiveness with an ability of the individual to be accountable .  As Robert Enrifght points out is his book Forgiveness is a Choice forgiveness is first and foremost for the one doing the forgiving.  As Brandt’s mother said, “Your load is lighter.”

 
Written October 5, 2019
Jimmy F Pickett
coachpickett.org