Scattered
There are times when it seems as if everything we touch fails to work. We may not know that the reason. For whatever reason, we are having a difficult time focusing, but we continue to feel as if our internal motor will not shut down. Unless we understand what is going on we may continue to feed the anxious, negative thoughts which keep assaulting our minds.
First, we may do a mental check list regarding nutrition, caffeine intake, any over the counter medications side-affects, rest and sleep habits. Are there work or personal deadlines looming which we feel we cannot meet? Are we approaching an anniversary date of the emotional or physical death of a loved one? Is there a trauma related anniversary approaching? Has some event or something someone said or did recently triggered an old, negative message about our self-worth? Most of us have an internal file drawer of negative messages.
After reviewing this checklist, we may not be able to identify any factors which has triggered our internal anxiety. If that is the case, we may be on the verge of getting physically sick. I know, for example, that I frequently ignore signals from my body which indicate I am getting a cold or some other nuisance illness which disturbs my inner balance.
Perhaps we are just having a day when the systems are off balanced for no apparent reason. If it possible, we may want to reevaluate our to do list for the day. If you are like me you may find that some items which I had decided had to be done today can, in fact, be postponed or rescheduled for a definite date later in the week. Setting a definite date helps to reduce worrying about them. I know that I will do them, on or prior to that date. Obviously, some deadlines might be difficult to change. If we are a parent, particularly a single parent, without close friends who can help for the day, we will have to do the necessities. If there is a co-parent we may want to ask if that person can take over for the day/evening.
If we are so scattered that we are having problems even deciding what is a priority, we may call a close friend, a therapist, sponsor, or family member and ask for help with even that decision.
Above all one wants to avoid feeding negative thoughts or feelings. One wants to avoid words like should, have to, bad, wrong, lazy, stupid, etc. One might want to avoid all evaluative labels, even positive ones. The goal is to accept the current situation and one’s current state of mind and to problem solve. I am not always my best, most efficient, productive self. That is just what is. Any internal or verbal commentary will just feed the sense of discord and decrease one’s ability to problem solve.
Sounds simple but actually this is very difficult for most of us. We are used to tolerating and feeding internal chatter. Just noticing without labeling will require very intentional practice. How much practice? As much as it takes.
Written December 3, 2018
There are times when it seems as if everything we touch fails to work. We may not know that the reason. For whatever reason, we are having a difficult time focusing, but we continue to feel as if our internal motor will not shut down. Unless we understand what is going on we may continue to feed the anxious, negative thoughts which keep assaulting our minds.
First, we may do a mental check list regarding nutrition, caffeine intake, any over the counter medications side-affects, rest and sleep habits. Are there work or personal deadlines looming which we feel we cannot meet? Are we approaching an anniversary date of the emotional or physical death of a loved one? Is there a trauma related anniversary approaching? Has some event or something someone said or did recently triggered an old, negative message about our self-worth? Most of us have an internal file drawer of negative messages.
After reviewing this checklist, we may not be able to identify any factors which has triggered our internal anxiety. If that is the case, we may be on the verge of getting physically sick. I know, for example, that I frequently ignore signals from my body which indicate I am getting a cold or some other nuisance illness which disturbs my inner balance.
Perhaps we are just having a day when the systems are off balanced for no apparent reason. If it possible, we may want to reevaluate our to do list for the day. If you are like me you may find that some items which I had decided had to be done today can, in fact, be postponed or rescheduled for a definite date later in the week. Setting a definite date helps to reduce worrying about them. I know that I will do them, on or prior to that date. Obviously, some deadlines might be difficult to change. If we are a parent, particularly a single parent, without close friends who can help for the day, we will have to do the necessities. If there is a co-parent we may want to ask if that person can take over for the day/evening.
If we are so scattered that we are having problems even deciding what is a priority, we may call a close friend, a therapist, sponsor, or family member and ask for help with even that decision.
Above all one wants to avoid feeding negative thoughts or feelings. One wants to avoid words like should, have to, bad, wrong, lazy, stupid, etc. One might want to avoid all evaluative labels, even positive ones. The goal is to accept the current situation and one’s current state of mind and to problem solve. I am not always my best, most efficient, productive self. That is just what is. Any internal or verbal commentary will just feed the sense of discord and decrease one’s ability to problem solve.
Sounds simple but actually this is very difficult for most of us. We are used to tolerating and feeding internal chatter. Just noticing without labeling will require very intentional practice. How much practice? As much as it takes.
Written December 3, 2018
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