Sunday Musings - August 15, 2021
Writing our story
This week the podcast On Being rebroadcasts a 2012 conversation with Kevin Kling who is a professional storyteller. The title of this conversation is “The Losses We Grow Into”. As a child who was born with one “disabled” arm and later had an accident which paralyzed the other arm he has had a lot of experience with exploring the power of the story we tell ourselves. For example, following the motorcycle accident which took away the use of his formerly one usable arm his PTSD affected his ability to sleep. His therapist suggested he imagine a new story in which he did not injure his arm. Simply by telling himself a new story which sat alongside the original story he was able to begin to sleep. As he notes, he still had to wake up and function without the use of either arm.
Most of us arise daily with or without having slept well and immediately tell ourselves a story about the day. We may tell ourselves it will be a good day or we may tell ourselves it is going to be a rotten day. Anxiety, depression, grief, or some other emotion may choreograph our story for that day. We may be in the habit of allowing the dance which our disease has choreographed to write our story. For many it may feel if one does not have a choice. One may be used to allowing the “dis ease” to define who they are and, thus, what their dance will be. For still others, another person or event might choreograph one’s daily story. Some individuals are bullied or otherwise told they are worthless or not good enough. They may be living in a home or place such as a prison where they are treated as if they deserve to be treated as less then. Some may not realize that they have the power to write a different story- a more positive story. We only have to look at the musicians who wrote amazing music while in the death camps during the Holocaust or individuals such as Otto Frank, Ellie Wiesel, and Nelson Mandela who refused to allow their oppressors to choreograph their life dance. Eleanor Roosevelt and Sonia Sotomayor also refused to allow life circumstances to choreograph their life dance - to write their story.
I do not want to minimize the power of mental illness or trauma such as the accident which paralyzed the one good arm of Kevin Kling. Sometimes medication can take the edge off an illness to make it a little easier to write a more positive story for oneself. Yet, it is still up to all of us to get whatever support or help we need to be able to write the story we want to strive to live today.
In this age of social media and a host of venues for sharing information it is often difficult to decide what information to believe before writing our story for the day. Just this morning I have communicated with several people about the efficacy of wearing masks and/or getting vaccinations to ease the spread of the Delta Variant. Very intelligent, bright people have come to different conclusions. They will design their dance or perhaps the dance for the community with the Delta Variant based on which individuals or news sources they believe.
Daily I write what I choose to call my spiritual intention for the day. This intention is my way of beginning to write the story I will live today. I may need to come back to that intention throughout the day to remind myself what story I want to live. It is easy for this human to allow other people or events to choreography a new dance - write a new story. Obviously, there is much none of us can control. There are very tragic events which all of us must face and somehow incorporate into our story. Kevin Kling does not deny he had an accident which left his one good arm paralyzed. With the help of his therapist, he wrote another story to sit alongside the other story. His arm was paralyzed, and he would have to learn to use a voice recognition software to write. He was disabled and yet he is still able to live a rich and fulfilling life. Nothing of the essence of who he is was destroyed in the accident.
I love this reminder of the power of stories we tell ourselves. Many groups of people have long recognized the power of story telling. This has been true for many Native American tribes. it was equally true for the early humans who used hieroglyphics a record of their story.
Kevin Kling quotes his friend Ingrid who lives with aphasia. “And Ingrid said, one time, before her aphasia I used to feel, ‘I think; therefore, I am.’ But now she knows we come from deeper place. Now she feels, “I am therefore, I think.’”
As is true for Kevin and Ingrid, today we can choreograph the story of the life dance we want to live today. We cannot plan or control the details which appear, but we can decide the relationship we want with those details. This relationship becomes our story.
Written August 15, 2021
Jimmy F Pickett
coachpickett.org
Writing our story
This week the podcast On Being rebroadcasts a 2012 conversation with Kevin Kling who is a professional storyteller. The title of this conversation is “The Losses We Grow Into”. As a child who was born with one “disabled” arm and later had an accident which paralyzed the other arm he has had a lot of experience with exploring the power of the story we tell ourselves. For example, following the motorcycle accident which took away the use of his formerly one usable arm his PTSD affected his ability to sleep. His therapist suggested he imagine a new story in which he did not injure his arm. Simply by telling himself a new story which sat alongside the original story he was able to begin to sleep. As he notes, he still had to wake up and function without the use of either arm.
Most of us arise daily with or without having slept well and immediately tell ourselves a story about the day. We may tell ourselves it will be a good day or we may tell ourselves it is going to be a rotten day. Anxiety, depression, grief, or some other emotion may choreograph our story for that day. We may be in the habit of allowing the dance which our disease has choreographed to write our story. For many it may feel if one does not have a choice. One may be used to allowing the “dis ease” to define who they are and, thus, what their dance will be. For still others, another person or event might choreograph one’s daily story. Some individuals are bullied or otherwise told they are worthless or not good enough. They may be living in a home or place such as a prison where they are treated as if they deserve to be treated as less then. Some may not realize that they have the power to write a different story- a more positive story. We only have to look at the musicians who wrote amazing music while in the death camps during the Holocaust or individuals such as Otto Frank, Ellie Wiesel, and Nelson Mandela who refused to allow their oppressors to choreograph their life dance. Eleanor Roosevelt and Sonia Sotomayor also refused to allow life circumstances to choreograph their life dance - to write their story.
I do not want to minimize the power of mental illness or trauma such as the accident which paralyzed the one good arm of Kevin Kling. Sometimes medication can take the edge off an illness to make it a little easier to write a more positive story for oneself. Yet, it is still up to all of us to get whatever support or help we need to be able to write the story we want to strive to live today.
In this age of social media and a host of venues for sharing information it is often difficult to decide what information to believe before writing our story for the day. Just this morning I have communicated with several people about the efficacy of wearing masks and/or getting vaccinations to ease the spread of the Delta Variant. Very intelligent, bright people have come to different conclusions. They will design their dance or perhaps the dance for the community with the Delta Variant based on which individuals or news sources they believe.
Daily I write what I choose to call my spiritual intention for the day. This intention is my way of beginning to write the story I will live today. I may need to come back to that intention throughout the day to remind myself what story I want to live. It is easy for this human to allow other people or events to choreography a new dance - write a new story. Obviously, there is much none of us can control. There are very tragic events which all of us must face and somehow incorporate into our story. Kevin Kling does not deny he had an accident which left his one good arm paralyzed. With the help of his therapist, he wrote another story to sit alongside the other story. His arm was paralyzed, and he would have to learn to use a voice recognition software to write. He was disabled and yet he is still able to live a rich and fulfilling life. Nothing of the essence of who he is was destroyed in the accident.
I love this reminder of the power of stories we tell ourselves. Many groups of people have long recognized the power of story telling. This has been true for many Native American tribes. it was equally true for the early humans who used hieroglyphics a record of their story.
Kevin Kling quotes his friend Ingrid who lives with aphasia. “And Ingrid said, one time, before her aphasia I used to feel, ‘I think; therefore, I am.’ But now she knows we come from deeper place. Now she feels, “I am therefore, I think.’”
As is true for Kevin and Ingrid, today we can choreograph the story of the life dance we want to live today. We cannot plan or control the details which appear, but we can decide the relationship we want with those details. This relationship becomes our story.
Written August 15, 2021
Jimmy F Pickett
coachpickett.org
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