Sunday Musings – February 11, 2018 – Our best selves
I borrowed the phrase our best selves from Brené Brown, which she used in her February 8, 2018 conversation with Krista Tippett on the podcast On Being.
For me, Sunday is the Sabbath and, thus, the day when I am particularly focused on what it might mean to be my best self - to review those obstacles I put in the way of being my best self. On the surface, it was a pretty routine week. I planned a schedule and then adjusted it as dictated by the weather, friends and clients. I did see clients in my home office, in the facility where I volunteer and via the magic of phone and Internet connection. I also joined others at an open 12-step recovery meeting where I am always welcomed with warm hearts. Friday night many others and I filled nearly every seat at the local downtown theater for a Wheeling Symphony Orchestra performance with Jeans ‘N Classics3. A couple of days I joined friends for lunch.
I was with people a lot of the time. Much of the time I felt authentically connected with people. I did not feel myself holding or standing back because of difference in opinions. Brené Brown said “I don’t think-when we’re our best selves with each other, I don’t think that what’s possible between people. I believe that’s what’s true between people. And I don’t think we have to work to make it true between people. I think that we just have to get the stuff out of the way that’s stopping it from happening.” I love this statement because it is my experience that when I quit focusing on the surface differences between others and myself I am fully present with them.
At times I can communicate as if I know answers or as if my way of looking at social and political issues separates me from others. If not careful, I can use those differences to put up walls. Walls prevent me from being with people - what Ms. Brown calls being true with each other. I do not want to judge others or to delude myself into thinking that I have answers. I have many questions but no answers. I do know that like all people I want to be a part of without sacrificing or hiding that I am. I do not want to be offensive or pretend that I am okay with the use of language, which demeans others. On the other hand, I do want to respond to the fear, which underlies the use of language or other behavior, which demeans others.
As I prepare to leave for religious services I want to stay focused on what I have in common with others and not on the differences in how I understand the framework of a particular religious practice. I know as I begin a new week I will stumble and I will confuse standing up for the sacredness of all people with disconnecting from others. At times I will disconnect with myself, which makes it impossible to connect with others.
I will remind myself that I am never alone except when I choose to be. I do belong to a larger whole – a larger we – and I can, when needed, stand alone.
Thanks to Krista Tippett and Brené Brown for their reminders of what it means to be true to who I am as a part of a larger whole.
Written February 11, 2018
I borrowed the phrase our best selves from Brené Brown, which she used in her February 8, 2018 conversation with Krista Tippett on the podcast On Being.
For me, Sunday is the Sabbath and, thus, the day when I am particularly focused on what it might mean to be my best self - to review those obstacles I put in the way of being my best self. On the surface, it was a pretty routine week. I planned a schedule and then adjusted it as dictated by the weather, friends and clients. I did see clients in my home office, in the facility where I volunteer and via the magic of phone and Internet connection. I also joined others at an open 12-step recovery meeting where I am always welcomed with warm hearts. Friday night many others and I filled nearly every seat at the local downtown theater for a Wheeling Symphony Orchestra performance with Jeans ‘N Classics3. A couple of days I joined friends for lunch.
I was with people a lot of the time. Much of the time I felt authentically connected with people. I did not feel myself holding or standing back because of difference in opinions. Brené Brown said “I don’t think-when we’re our best selves with each other, I don’t think that what’s possible between people. I believe that’s what’s true between people. And I don’t think we have to work to make it true between people. I think that we just have to get the stuff out of the way that’s stopping it from happening.” I love this statement because it is my experience that when I quit focusing on the surface differences between others and myself I am fully present with them.
At times I can communicate as if I know answers or as if my way of looking at social and political issues separates me from others. If not careful, I can use those differences to put up walls. Walls prevent me from being with people - what Ms. Brown calls being true with each other. I do not want to judge others or to delude myself into thinking that I have answers. I have many questions but no answers. I do know that like all people I want to be a part of without sacrificing or hiding that I am. I do not want to be offensive or pretend that I am okay with the use of language, which demeans others. On the other hand, I do want to respond to the fear, which underlies the use of language or other behavior, which demeans others.
As I prepare to leave for religious services I want to stay focused on what I have in common with others and not on the differences in how I understand the framework of a particular religious practice. I know as I begin a new week I will stumble and I will confuse standing up for the sacredness of all people with disconnecting from others. At times I will disconnect with myself, which makes it impossible to connect with others.
I will remind myself that I am never alone except when I choose to be. I do belong to a larger whole – a larger we – and I can, when needed, stand alone.
Thanks to Krista Tippett and Brené Brown for their reminders of what it means to be true to who I am as a part of a larger whole.
Written February 11, 2018
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