The angst of getting healthy
I was talking to a friend this morning who has now been on a journey of growing emotionally and spiritually for some time. For too many years it seemed normal when addiction kidnapped his mind and his body. Self-defeating and destructive behavior were his default and, even if uncomfortable, he believed he just had to live with such discomfort. Now that he is no longer in active addiction and has been intentional about identifying his core values and the direction he wants his life to take, when he engages in self-defeating and destructive behavior he is very uncomfortable. In fact, sometimes he feels so uncomfortable he questions his mental health. He may even call the hot line at the Veterans Administration hospital. His body tells him that something is terribly wrong. He may have symptoms of anxiety, panic attacks or clinical depression as well as many physical symptoms which indicates one’s system is off center/very unhappy! This is good news. He is no longer able to be self-destructive and lie to himself. His body sounds a loud alarm. Sadly, many of my colleagues might diagnose him with a mental illness. A psychiatrist or even a family doctor might, upon the recommendation of a counselor, psychologist, or psychiatric social worker, prescribe one, two or even three medications for his mental illness. When he called me I suggested that it was wonderful he was feeling so physically and mentally lousy. The symptoms he is experiencing are a sign of his health and not of his sickness.
The more spiritually and emotionally healthy one is the less able one is able to deviate from healthy habits which are aligned with one’s core values. Part of emotional and spiritual health is the increasingly inability to lie to oneself. Every program of healing and growth including the 12-step program originally created by Bill Wilson and Dr. Bob involves a commitment to oneself to honesty, open mindedness and willingness. The healthier one is the less able one is to lie to oneself; the less able one is to hold on to the delusion that truth about oneself and the world will fit into neat little boxes and the more willing one has to be to move beyond one’s comfort zone. Once one reaches this level of spiritual growth this is no going back to the limited concept of self which one had attempted to pass off as the authentic self. Every time one attempts to do this one experiences what I call the angst of getting healthy.
Sometimes I use the analogy of a very carefully built, expensive car or other machine. That car or other machine is capable of amazing performance but it does not take much for one of its parts to be even slightly off. This affects all aspects of the performance of the automobile or other machine. The same thing happen with us humans. The healthier one become the easier one gets off center and feels very uncomfortable mentally/emotionally and/or physically. It is as if the body’s early warning system has just been cleaned and retooled so that it is in prime condition. If one deviates from a healthy nutritional plan, quits exercising, drinks too much caffeine or alcohol, or engages in other unhealthy behavior the early warning system of the body sounds an alarm. It is similar to the very sensitive smoke alarm I have in my kitchen. The least little bit of smoke or overheating of something instantly triggers this very loud and incessant alarm. Sometimes it is aggravating and I consider moving it so that is not so easily set off, but then I always decide that I appreciate it being so sensitive.
Making a decision to embark on a journey of emotional, spiritual, and physical health is a laudable goal. One does, however, have to be prepared to be the owner of a very finely tuned body which will not allow for much deviation from healthy habits in all areas of one’s life.
Written September 5, 2019
Jimmy F Pickett
coachpickett.org
I was talking to a friend this morning who has now been on a journey of growing emotionally and spiritually for some time. For too many years it seemed normal when addiction kidnapped his mind and his body. Self-defeating and destructive behavior were his default and, even if uncomfortable, he believed he just had to live with such discomfort. Now that he is no longer in active addiction and has been intentional about identifying his core values and the direction he wants his life to take, when he engages in self-defeating and destructive behavior he is very uncomfortable. In fact, sometimes he feels so uncomfortable he questions his mental health. He may even call the hot line at the Veterans Administration hospital. His body tells him that something is terribly wrong. He may have symptoms of anxiety, panic attacks or clinical depression as well as many physical symptoms which indicates one’s system is off center/very unhappy! This is good news. He is no longer able to be self-destructive and lie to himself. His body sounds a loud alarm. Sadly, many of my colleagues might diagnose him with a mental illness. A psychiatrist or even a family doctor might, upon the recommendation of a counselor, psychologist, or psychiatric social worker, prescribe one, two or even three medications for his mental illness. When he called me I suggested that it was wonderful he was feeling so physically and mentally lousy. The symptoms he is experiencing are a sign of his health and not of his sickness.
The more spiritually and emotionally healthy one is the less able one is able to deviate from healthy habits which are aligned with one’s core values. Part of emotional and spiritual health is the increasingly inability to lie to oneself. Every program of healing and growth including the 12-step program originally created by Bill Wilson and Dr. Bob involves a commitment to oneself to honesty, open mindedness and willingness. The healthier one is the less able one is to lie to oneself; the less able one is to hold on to the delusion that truth about oneself and the world will fit into neat little boxes and the more willing one has to be to move beyond one’s comfort zone. Once one reaches this level of spiritual growth this is no going back to the limited concept of self which one had attempted to pass off as the authentic self. Every time one attempts to do this one experiences what I call the angst of getting healthy.
Sometimes I use the analogy of a very carefully built, expensive car or other machine. That car or other machine is capable of amazing performance but it does not take much for one of its parts to be even slightly off. This affects all aspects of the performance of the automobile or other machine. The same thing happen with us humans. The healthier one become the easier one gets off center and feels very uncomfortable mentally/emotionally and/or physically. It is as if the body’s early warning system has just been cleaned and retooled so that it is in prime condition. If one deviates from a healthy nutritional plan, quits exercising, drinks too much caffeine or alcohol, or engages in other unhealthy behavior the early warning system of the body sounds an alarm. It is similar to the very sensitive smoke alarm I have in my kitchen. The least little bit of smoke or overheating of something instantly triggers this very loud and incessant alarm. Sometimes it is aggravating and I consider moving it so that is not so easily set off, but then I always decide that I appreciate it being so sensitive.
Making a decision to embark on a journey of emotional, spiritual, and physical health is a laudable goal. One does, however, have to be prepared to be the owner of a very finely tuned body which will not allow for much deviation from healthy habits in all areas of one’s life.
Written September 5, 2019
Jimmy F Pickett
coachpickett.org
RSS Feed