The self we pack
This morning I arrived at the gym to find a couple I know helping the woman at the desk, Jan, fold towels. Towel folding is just one of Jan’s many duties at the front desk. I was not surprised to find this particular couple helping. My experiences says both of these individuals are bright, kind, creative, community oriented people. Those qualities seem to be consistently present no matter where I see them or their momentary role. Mutual friends confirm that they are indeed that consistent in all aspects of their life.
While reading the morning newspaper I was thinking about how comforting it is to be able to trust this couple to be who they are.
I read yet another story about the expensive renovations of the offices of the West Virginia Supreme Court Judges. The article mentions that not only had a good deal of money been spent, but that each office was very individualized even though, unlike the United States Supreme Court Judges, theses judges serve a limited term. I found myself wondering if all of them are so wealthy that they never have to worry about a budget at home. There are, I am told, such people. Most of us do have a home budget. Most of us do also have a work budget.
One of the issues which frequently comes up in my counseling work with/for people has to do with using work skills at home and home skills at work. Often individuals say to me that they do not have a particular skill and, yet, I find that they do have that skill in their work or home environment. For example, a person who is the chief finanical officer for a major company told me that they did not know how to do a home budget. Someone else told me that they did not know how to manage employees without being a bully. Yet, I know they work as a team with their family.
Obviously, if one has skills that they use in one segment of their life one can apply those skills in all areas of their lives. Frequently, I suggest that one pack up home skills in their briefcase or lunch bucket and then pack up work skills as they get ready to return home for the evening.
Many of us humans seem to have a habit of compartmentalizing skills, abilities or even approaches to working with others. Some of us may, on the other hand, be more consistent. Often I find those who are a bully in the workplace may be a bully at home. Sometimes this is not the case. I often wonder if all the United States diplomats and politicians who seem to think that it is okay to attempt to bully other nations into doing what we want them to do or think that they should do are bullies with their spouses, children and co-workers.
Most of us admire creativity while also admiring some consistently in being the same person in one’s varied roles. Of course, if one is consistently a bully, a victim, helpless or otherwise challenged then one may want to do some self-examination. There might be a reason why both employees and family members avoid one. One might want to explore consistently treating others as one wants to be treated which may require carrying all ones talents and skills with one. If one is honestly missing some necessary skills and talents one might want to don the appropriate costume and go shopping!
Written August 7, 2018
This morning I arrived at the gym to find a couple I know helping the woman at the desk, Jan, fold towels. Towel folding is just one of Jan’s many duties at the front desk. I was not surprised to find this particular couple helping. My experiences says both of these individuals are bright, kind, creative, community oriented people. Those qualities seem to be consistently present no matter where I see them or their momentary role. Mutual friends confirm that they are indeed that consistent in all aspects of their life.
While reading the morning newspaper I was thinking about how comforting it is to be able to trust this couple to be who they are.
I read yet another story about the expensive renovations of the offices of the West Virginia Supreme Court Judges. The article mentions that not only had a good deal of money been spent, but that each office was very individualized even though, unlike the United States Supreme Court Judges, theses judges serve a limited term. I found myself wondering if all of them are so wealthy that they never have to worry about a budget at home. There are, I am told, such people. Most of us do have a home budget. Most of us do also have a work budget.
One of the issues which frequently comes up in my counseling work with/for people has to do with using work skills at home and home skills at work. Often individuals say to me that they do not have a particular skill and, yet, I find that they do have that skill in their work or home environment. For example, a person who is the chief finanical officer for a major company told me that they did not know how to do a home budget. Someone else told me that they did not know how to manage employees without being a bully. Yet, I know they work as a team with their family.
Obviously, if one has skills that they use in one segment of their life one can apply those skills in all areas of their lives. Frequently, I suggest that one pack up home skills in their briefcase or lunch bucket and then pack up work skills as they get ready to return home for the evening.
Many of us humans seem to have a habit of compartmentalizing skills, abilities or even approaches to working with others. Some of us may, on the other hand, be more consistent. Often I find those who are a bully in the workplace may be a bully at home. Sometimes this is not the case. I often wonder if all the United States diplomats and politicians who seem to think that it is okay to attempt to bully other nations into doing what we want them to do or think that they should do are bullies with their spouses, children and co-workers.
Most of us admire creativity while also admiring some consistently in being the same person in one’s varied roles. Of course, if one is consistently a bully, a victim, helpless or otherwise challenged then one may want to do some self-examination. There might be a reason why both employees and family members avoid one. One might want to explore consistently treating others as one wants to be treated which may require carrying all ones talents and skills with one. If one is honestly missing some necessary skills and talents one might want to don the appropriate costume and go shopping!
Written August 7, 2018
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