The wolf of addiction
Scientist now document that addiction changes how one’s brain is able to process incoming stimuli including internal information/signals. Many drugs including alcohol either numb one out so one does not get appropriate pain cues or they make the body hyper sensitive to internal and external stimuli. It may also be that many addicts experience those stimuli more intensely prior to experiencing brain changes caused directly and indirectly by drug use or other addictive behavior. It is no wonder, that those who live , work with or otherwise have contact with addicts experience them as overly dramatic. Some might think of them as drama kings or queens. What others view is pseudo emergencies, the addict experiences as emergencies or crises.
During the active addiction and even after the addict gets into recovery, the family members, friends and co-workers have learned to numb themselves to what they might consider the wolf calls. Thus, it is easy for them to ignore or discount genuine emergencies – even life threatening ones. The addict whose self-esteem is already non-existent or at a very low point – even the recovering one – may begin to feel as if it does not matter to anyone if they live or die.
This is just one of the many reasons that it is important for the addict to (1) get into recovery and (2) get help from other recovering addicts who understand why everyone seems numb to the physical and emotional issues of the addict. Other recovery addicts can be both empathetic and provide a reality check for dealing with life on life’s terms. The addict in recovery learns that issues such as the death of a loved one, accidents, financial issues, and even intense physical pain are “normal” life events that most people just deal with. This does not mean an absence of emotion. It does mean that family members, friends and co-workers do not stop their lives every time life shows up. In fact that they act as if there are no life crises. There is just life showing up. If the newly recovering addict discovers that he or she is experiencing a serious life issue folks may or may not provide some practical assistance. After all, others have jobs, bills to pay, lawns to mow, friends to nourish, and their own health care to which they need to attend.
One of the paradoxes of this life journey is: “All is important and nothing is important.” While we may love and care for each other, no matter what we do or do not do this life journey is very, very brief. Certainly, I do not want my son to be homeless, to allow my homeowners insurance to lapse, to have friends deal with chronic pain, or to see children or adults abused. Yet, these and other events will come and go. In just an instant we all end this life journey.
I hope that most of us can learn to access that internal dialogue which allows us to take a deep breath and remind the drama voice that we can and will deal with the life event which the other internal voice is labeling as the crisis de jour.
Written May 21, 2018
The wolf of addiction
Scientist now document that addiction changes how one’s brain is able to process incoming stimuli including internal information/signals. Many drugs including alcohol either numb one out so one does not get appropriate pain cues or they make the body hyper sensitive to internal and external stimuli. It may also be that many addicts experience those stimuli more intensely prior to experiencing brain changes caused directly and indirectly by drug use or other addictive behavior. It is no wonder, that those who live , work with or otherwise have contact with addicts experience them as overly dramatic. Some might think of them as drama kings or queens. What others view is pseudo emergencies, the addict experiences as emergencies or crises.
During the active addiction and even after the addict gets into recovery, the family members, friends and co-workers have learned to numb themselves to what they might consider the wolf calls. Thus, it is easy for them to ignore or discount genuine emergencies – even life threatening ones. The addict whose self-esteem is already non-existent or at a very low point – even the recovering one – may begin to feel as if it does not matter to anyone if they live or die.
This is just one of the many reasons that it is important for the addict to (1) get into recovery and (2) get help from other recovering addicts who understand why everyone seems numb to the physical and emotional issues of the addict. Other recovery addicts can be both empathetic and provide a reality check for dealing with life on life’s terms. The addict in recovery learns that issues such as the death of a loved one, accidents, financial issues, and even intense physical pain are “normal” life events that most people just deal with. This does not mean an absence of emotion. It does mean that family members, friends and co-workers do not stop their lives every time life shows up. In fact that they act as if there are no life crises. There is just life showing up. If the newly recovering addict discovers that he or she is experiencing a serious life issue folks may or may not provide some practical assistance. After all, others have jobs, bills to pay, lawns to mow, friends to nourish, and their own health care to which they need to attend.
One of the paradoxes of this life journey is: “All is important and nothing is important.” While we may love and care for each other, no matter what we do or do not do this life journey is very, very brief. Certainly, I do not want my son to be homeless, to allow my homeowners insurance to lapse, to have friends deal with chronic pain, or to see children or adults abused. Yet, these and other events will come and go. In just an instant we all end this life journey.
I hope that most of us can learn to access that internal dialogue which allows us to take a deep breath and remind the drama voice that we can and will deal with the life event which the other internal voice is labeling as the crisis de jour.
Written May 21, 2018
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