Trust?
The subject of trust is one which many of us face in our personal lives. It is also a subject which appears frequently in the national and international news. Here in the United States the subject of trust is a particularly focal and volatile one as we finally near the end of the 2016 presidential election campaign. Voting citizens are faced with the dilemma of who to trust, what institutions to trust, if any. Daily we hear stones being thrown whose goal is to crack open the fragile facade of integrity which each candidate is attempting to sell. We also hear words such as establishment linked with distrust. There are layers of accusations and predictions of the collapse of the United States if one elects the wrong person.
Around the world it seems as if all manner of governments and institutions have failed to retain the trust of many. Corporations seem to be in the business of lining the pockets of a few while breaking basic promises to current employees and retirees. Promises of pensions, health care and other benefits encased in legally solid documents are seemingly no more than the fairy tales one may have heard or read as a child.
Marriage vows which used to seem clear now seem to be open to interpretation and easily replaced with more sacred vows to respective attorneys.
What we thought we knew as truth in most areas of science is daily altered or refuted all together.
Climate change threatens the demise of the planet as we know it.
Every day we spend billions of dollars on sophisticated weapons of destruction and corresponding systems which are intended to defend one against such systems, but which seem to only line the pockets of the manufacturer whose product does not even have to function for them to get a bonus.
Yet, as Rachel Botsman points out in her October 2016 Ted talk, “The new era of trust could bring with it a more transparent, inclusive and accountable society.”
(Google Ms. Botsman and one finds the following: “Rachel loves to teach people how the principles of the collaborative economy are a transformative lens to think about value, scale and trust differently. She designed the world’s first M.B.A. course on the subject which she teaches at University of Oxford, Saïd Business School.”
In the area of mistrust, we are increasingly trustful of the Uber driver, the person whose bed is part of Airbnb, the person we meet on an internet dating site, or the speaker on programs such as Ted Talks. We listen reverently to the spiritual leaders such as the Dalai Lama, Pope Francis (one does not need to be Roman Catholic), the poet, the artist, the musician or even, the reality show participants or the person who pays it forward for no other reason than to pay it forward.
As Ms. Botsman so accurately and articulately points out we humans did not begin with institutions. We began by family and neighbors trusting each other to do one’s share in meeting the basic needs of the tribe or community. In this sense we seem to be, albeit via modern technology which does not confine our tribe to a relatively small geographical area, returning to our roots of trusting on a very individual and not organizational level.
I often, in my role as professional counselor, meet with couples or families to explore the reclaiming of trust which has been misplaced, lost or buried in pile of dung of angry words and years of allowing life tasks to take over. We may feel we now know too much to return to that leap of faith which led us to adoringly feed each other.
Yet, what have we learned is the antithesis of mistrust. We have learned that we are vulnerable, fearful humans who are desperate for some proof that we are enough – that we are worth picking up in a private car, making up the couch and saying welcome or a second look on a dating site. We may, just not need the power, money, sex, alcohol, other drugs, or things to say “Here I am. See ME. Pick me up. Take me into your home.” Now we are the stranger needing a ride, a bed, a meal or some other nurturing offering which is not dependent on one’s institutional associations which are, after all, build on sand.
We do seem to keep circling back to the basics and, yet, we will again feel the need to wander off only to, if we are lucky, return home.
Written October 18, 2016
The subject of trust is one which many of us face in our personal lives. It is also a subject which appears frequently in the national and international news. Here in the United States the subject of trust is a particularly focal and volatile one as we finally near the end of the 2016 presidential election campaign. Voting citizens are faced with the dilemma of who to trust, what institutions to trust, if any. Daily we hear stones being thrown whose goal is to crack open the fragile facade of integrity which each candidate is attempting to sell. We also hear words such as establishment linked with distrust. There are layers of accusations and predictions of the collapse of the United States if one elects the wrong person.
Around the world it seems as if all manner of governments and institutions have failed to retain the trust of many. Corporations seem to be in the business of lining the pockets of a few while breaking basic promises to current employees and retirees. Promises of pensions, health care and other benefits encased in legally solid documents are seemingly no more than the fairy tales one may have heard or read as a child.
Marriage vows which used to seem clear now seem to be open to interpretation and easily replaced with more sacred vows to respective attorneys.
What we thought we knew as truth in most areas of science is daily altered or refuted all together.
Climate change threatens the demise of the planet as we know it.
Every day we spend billions of dollars on sophisticated weapons of destruction and corresponding systems which are intended to defend one against such systems, but which seem to only line the pockets of the manufacturer whose product does not even have to function for them to get a bonus.
Yet, as Rachel Botsman points out in her October 2016 Ted talk, “The new era of trust could bring with it a more transparent, inclusive and accountable society.”
(Google Ms. Botsman and one finds the following: “Rachel loves to teach people how the principles of the collaborative economy are a transformative lens to think about value, scale and trust differently. She designed the world’s first M.B.A. course on the subject which she teaches at University of Oxford, Saïd Business School.”
In the area of mistrust, we are increasingly trustful of the Uber driver, the person whose bed is part of Airbnb, the person we meet on an internet dating site, or the speaker on programs such as Ted Talks. We listen reverently to the spiritual leaders such as the Dalai Lama, Pope Francis (one does not need to be Roman Catholic), the poet, the artist, the musician or even, the reality show participants or the person who pays it forward for no other reason than to pay it forward.
As Ms. Botsman so accurately and articulately points out we humans did not begin with institutions. We began by family and neighbors trusting each other to do one’s share in meeting the basic needs of the tribe or community. In this sense we seem to be, albeit via modern technology which does not confine our tribe to a relatively small geographical area, returning to our roots of trusting on a very individual and not organizational level.
I often, in my role as professional counselor, meet with couples or families to explore the reclaiming of trust which has been misplaced, lost or buried in pile of dung of angry words and years of allowing life tasks to take over. We may feel we now know too much to return to that leap of faith which led us to adoringly feed each other.
Yet, what have we learned is the antithesis of mistrust. We have learned that we are vulnerable, fearful humans who are desperate for some proof that we are enough – that we are worth picking up in a private car, making up the couch and saying welcome or a second look on a dating site. We may, just not need the power, money, sex, alcohol, other drugs, or things to say “Here I am. See ME. Pick me up. Take me into your home.” Now we are the stranger needing a ride, a bed, a meal or some other nurturing offering which is not dependent on one’s institutional associations which are, after all, build on sand.
We do seem to keep circling back to the basics and, yet, we will again feel the need to wander off only to, if we are lucky, return home.
Written October 18, 2016
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