Welcome
I want to again write about the welcome that 12 step group members give to the newcomer. I am not suggesting that 12 step programs zap members into sainthood. Any 12-step member who is working a program will share that they and the rest of the members are a work in progress.
If one attends a variety of meeting - AA, NA, MA or those addressing other addictions - one will notice that the vibe, atmosphere or aura of particular groups may vary, but they are all based on the same 12 steps and the same welcoming tradition. The only requirement for group membership is the desire to stop using/engaging in an addictive behavior. Obviously just the desire is not enough to accomplish the goal of reclaiming or claiming a life of which one can be proud. Anyone who had attempted to change habits of thinking and behavior know that it is hard work.
Members may make a special effort to celebrate the anniversary of someone who has been an active member of a recovery group. I recently attended a meeting at which some of the members had put a lot of effort into creating a celebration for a member who has been clean and sober for nine years. The person is known for sponsoring others who need support and guidance in working the steps of the program.
At this meeting there was also one young member who was brand new to the recovery program. He was given a welcome key tag, a booklet and many hugs.
Neither the person with nine years nor the person who was new to the program and struggling just to not use for that day were required to fill out an application listing their positive and behavior. They were not asked their sexual orientation, what drugs they had abused or a listing of any other addictive behavior.
At 12 step meetings it is accepted that all members are a work in progress. One may be at a point in recovery, which leaves one clueless about how self-centered one is. One may still feel such low self-esteem that one will try to use appearance, money, or position to feel worthwhile. It does not matter. All are works in progress. It is hoped and suggested one work the steps to identify and begin to change one’s behavior. It is hoped and suggested that one learn the value of making amends when one is unkind or hurtful to another. It is hoped and suggested that one learn to practice the principles of the 12 steps in all one’s affairs.
Yet, just for today, all one has to do is to show up with a desire to stop one’s addictive behavior. As long as one does not threaten the recovery of others at a meeting one is welcomed. If one relapses 30 times and comes back to start over 30 times one is welcome as the prodigal child with a feast of love.
The miracle for those who keep coming back and work the steps of the program is healing occurs. It occurs without a hint of punishment from others. One does, if one stays and works a program, learn to be accountable for one’s actions, but no one is ever punished. Every tiny step forward is rewarded with many hugs, sometimes a cake, and lots of hand clapping which some social scientists claim is a way of giving a long distance hug.
Welcome. Welcome. Welcome.
Written January 18, 2018
I want to again write about the welcome that 12 step group members give to the newcomer. I am not suggesting that 12 step programs zap members into sainthood. Any 12-step member who is working a program will share that they and the rest of the members are a work in progress.
If one attends a variety of meeting - AA, NA, MA or those addressing other addictions - one will notice that the vibe, atmosphere or aura of particular groups may vary, but they are all based on the same 12 steps and the same welcoming tradition. The only requirement for group membership is the desire to stop using/engaging in an addictive behavior. Obviously just the desire is not enough to accomplish the goal of reclaiming or claiming a life of which one can be proud. Anyone who had attempted to change habits of thinking and behavior know that it is hard work.
Members may make a special effort to celebrate the anniversary of someone who has been an active member of a recovery group. I recently attended a meeting at which some of the members had put a lot of effort into creating a celebration for a member who has been clean and sober for nine years. The person is known for sponsoring others who need support and guidance in working the steps of the program.
At this meeting there was also one young member who was brand new to the recovery program. He was given a welcome key tag, a booklet and many hugs.
Neither the person with nine years nor the person who was new to the program and struggling just to not use for that day were required to fill out an application listing their positive and behavior. They were not asked their sexual orientation, what drugs they had abused or a listing of any other addictive behavior.
At 12 step meetings it is accepted that all members are a work in progress. One may be at a point in recovery, which leaves one clueless about how self-centered one is. One may still feel such low self-esteem that one will try to use appearance, money, or position to feel worthwhile. It does not matter. All are works in progress. It is hoped and suggested one work the steps to identify and begin to change one’s behavior. It is hoped and suggested that one learn the value of making amends when one is unkind or hurtful to another. It is hoped and suggested that one learn to practice the principles of the 12 steps in all one’s affairs.
Yet, just for today, all one has to do is to show up with a desire to stop one’s addictive behavior. As long as one does not threaten the recovery of others at a meeting one is welcomed. If one relapses 30 times and comes back to start over 30 times one is welcome as the prodigal child with a feast of love.
The miracle for those who keep coming back and work the steps of the program is healing occurs. It occurs without a hint of punishment from others. One does, if one stays and works a program, learn to be accountable for one’s actions, but no one is ever punished. Every tiny step forward is rewarded with many hugs, sometimes a cake, and lots of hand clapping which some social scientists claim is a way of giving a long distance hug.
Welcome. Welcome. Welcome.
Written January 18, 2018
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