Who am I without humility
Today I went to the social security office to ask some questions regarding my Medicare Part B benefits for which I am being charged a significant penalty every month because I did not sign for it when I originally signed up for Medicare.
My point without subjecting the reader to the details regarding the conversation is that it was one of those conversations which robots posing as humans often have with each other. When one or both people fail to show up for a conversation it is just two robots taking past each other. Perhaps in this case there is something else I could have done to let this person know I saw her as a human being who also has a job to do. I have no idea what else I could have done, but sometimes I miss the obvious. I know that when I have a non-conversation which is masquerading as an interaction between two humans, I end up feeling disconnected, lonely and confused. I have no idea if this woman was prepared to have a conservation. Perhaps her mind was on a sick child or grandchild. Perhaps her husband or partner is in the hospital. Perhaps she herself had just learned that she has cancer. I have no idea because she did not share and gave me the impression that she did not have time for a relationship conversation. This was, after all, business. Sadly, this has been my experience every time I have gone to the social security office and often when dealing with the staff of other organizations. I hope that most of the time I am very intentional about focusing on the relationship while incidentally doing a task. When I allow the task to become primary I almost always feel empty and sad.
I just had a note from a friend who said that he and his family had gone holiday shopping last night, but really they “were more just spending time with each other.” This man, a severely wounded veteran is very aware that we only have today or this moment to be with each other.
The word humility came to mind when I was thinking about how I felt following the time at the Social Security Office which is always different than the experience my friend is describing with his family. Why humility one might reasonably ask? If one looks up the etiology the word one finds on oxforddictionary.com:
Humility. Noun…an act of genuine humility. Word Origin, Middle English: from old French huilite, from Latin humilitas, from humilis “low, lowly’, from humus ‘ground’.”
When we think of humility most of us think of the concept of grounded or solid, but then one must ask, “Grounded in what? Solid in what way?” To me it means that I am okay with me. I do not need to prove to myself or to another person that I am more or less than I am. I am this human being who can be many things. I often make mistakes. I have some talents but so does everyone else. If you meet me I do not need to impress you with a title, degrees, position, money or power. If you come to me for some service I know that you are first a person. If you are having a problem or dealing with a condition or illness you are not defined by that problem, condition or illness. I am not defined by whatever position, condition or illness I have. I am first and foremost a human being and that is enough.
Without the self-assurance which allows for humility – meeting someone as an equally important/worthwhile human – humans will continue to pass each other as if they are two ships passing in the night without seeing each other. Often that happens in families, the community, the workplace, and in the day-to-day meetings in other settings.
Without humility, we are all robots performing a function. It is like playing the right notes on the sheet music for Chopin’s Piano Concerto I, but without emotion or any sense of timing. It is just notes which is without life.
In fact, one might say that we do not exist as a breathing, emotional person without humility.
In this period of history, we continue to discover that robots can perform many of the functions which were formerly performed by men and women. This either frees those former factory workers to discover skills and talents which the mechanical job did not allow them to discover or it leaves them feeling as if they are even less important or worthwhile than a machine. Their worth may be tied to doing a particular job and bringing home a paycheck. If they do not know they can do other work with a sense of pride and purpose then they may get very depressed, defensive, anti-robot and do all they can to go back to a pre-robotic time. This will not happen. The robots are here to stay. Someone is going to need to continually design new robots. but one needs the opportunity to learn how to do this while still supporting one’s family. One also needs self-confidence. One needs humility.
Without humility, I cannot learn new skills, adapt to new situations, or rejoice in the beauty of relationships – with self, others and mother nature.
One might say I do not exist without humility.
Written December 15, 2106.
Today I went to the social security office to ask some questions regarding my Medicare Part B benefits for which I am being charged a significant penalty every month because I did not sign for it when I originally signed up for Medicare.
My point without subjecting the reader to the details regarding the conversation is that it was one of those conversations which robots posing as humans often have with each other. When one or both people fail to show up for a conversation it is just two robots taking past each other. Perhaps in this case there is something else I could have done to let this person know I saw her as a human being who also has a job to do. I have no idea what else I could have done, but sometimes I miss the obvious. I know that when I have a non-conversation which is masquerading as an interaction between two humans, I end up feeling disconnected, lonely and confused. I have no idea if this woman was prepared to have a conservation. Perhaps her mind was on a sick child or grandchild. Perhaps her husband or partner is in the hospital. Perhaps she herself had just learned that she has cancer. I have no idea because she did not share and gave me the impression that she did not have time for a relationship conversation. This was, after all, business. Sadly, this has been my experience every time I have gone to the social security office and often when dealing with the staff of other organizations. I hope that most of the time I am very intentional about focusing on the relationship while incidentally doing a task. When I allow the task to become primary I almost always feel empty and sad.
I just had a note from a friend who said that he and his family had gone holiday shopping last night, but really they “were more just spending time with each other.” This man, a severely wounded veteran is very aware that we only have today or this moment to be with each other.
The word humility came to mind when I was thinking about how I felt following the time at the Social Security Office which is always different than the experience my friend is describing with his family. Why humility one might reasonably ask? If one looks up the etiology the word one finds on oxforddictionary.com:
Humility. Noun…an act of genuine humility. Word Origin, Middle English: from old French huilite, from Latin humilitas, from humilis “low, lowly’, from humus ‘ground’.”
When we think of humility most of us think of the concept of grounded or solid, but then one must ask, “Grounded in what? Solid in what way?” To me it means that I am okay with me. I do not need to prove to myself or to another person that I am more or less than I am. I am this human being who can be many things. I often make mistakes. I have some talents but so does everyone else. If you meet me I do not need to impress you with a title, degrees, position, money or power. If you come to me for some service I know that you are first a person. If you are having a problem or dealing with a condition or illness you are not defined by that problem, condition or illness. I am not defined by whatever position, condition or illness I have. I am first and foremost a human being and that is enough.
Without the self-assurance which allows for humility – meeting someone as an equally important/worthwhile human – humans will continue to pass each other as if they are two ships passing in the night without seeing each other. Often that happens in families, the community, the workplace, and in the day-to-day meetings in other settings.
Without humility, we are all robots performing a function. It is like playing the right notes on the sheet music for Chopin’s Piano Concerto I, but without emotion or any sense of timing. It is just notes which is without life.
In fact, one might say that we do not exist as a breathing, emotional person without humility.
In this period of history, we continue to discover that robots can perform many of the functions which were formerly performed by men and women. This either frees those former factory workers to discover skills and talents which the mechanical job did not allow them to discover or it leaves them feeling as if they are even less important or worthwhile than a machine. Their worth may be tied to doing a particular job and bringing home a paycheck. If they do not know they can do other work with a sense of pride and purpose then they may get very depressed, defensive, anti-robot and do all they can to go back to a pre-robotic time. This will not happen. The robots are here to stay. Someone is going to need to continually design new robots. but one needs the opportunity to learn how to do this while still supporting one’s family. One also needs self-confidence. One needs humility.
Without humility, I cannot learn new skills, adapt to new situations, or rejoice in the beauty of relationships – with self, others and mother nature.
One might say I do not exist without humility.
Written December 15, 2106.
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