The Serenity Prayer
 
When Reinhold Niebuhr penned what has become known as the serenity prayer he was “merely” passing along the wisdom of the ancient stoic philosophers such as Zeno of Cilium (322-2672 BC) , Aristo of Chios, Herillus of Carthage and others.    References to Zeno and others are found in the writing attributed to Aristotle and other philosophers.
 
I was reminded this morning of the stoic philosophers while listening to a conversation on the podcast Hidden Brain between William Irvine and the host, Shankar Vedantam. This episode is entitled “Minimizing Pain and Maximizing Joy”.  I was also immediately reminded of the short version of the serenity prayer:
 
            God grant me the grace to accept with serenity
            the things that cannot be changed.
            Courage to change the things
            which should be changed
            and the Wisdom to distinguish
            the one from the other.
 
The Stoics believed that the goal of this life journey was happiness  which entailed living in agreement with nature.   Professor Irvine gives the example of the female surfer who arm was bitten off by a shark. As soon as she is able she teaches herself to surf with only one arm.  He also gives the example of the astronaut learning to land the craft on the moon and nearly getting killed when it malfunctioned and crashed.   Following the crash, the astronaut was calmly completing the requisite paperwork.
 
We are all aware that life shows up no matter what we do.  Certainly, we can wear seat belts, avoid walking on an icy sidewalk, get help with living with chronic illness such as addiction, diabetes, clinical depression or some other.   We can build a storm shelter if we live in a tornado zone. We can hire a professional plumber to minimize future flooding of our home or set a timer to remember to turn off the kitchen range.   Yet, no matter how pro-active  and careful we are there we find:
 

• We sometimes make a mistake with negative consequences.
• Someone else does something having negative consequences which affects us.
• We act as if mother nature should adjust to our wants and needs.
• Mother nature causes damage for which we could not prepare.

 
Many of us have a habit of getting unhappy and perhaps angry over events which result in negative consequences.  Us humans like the illusion of being in control and we expect ourselves and others to act in  a way which does not cause harm.   Obviously there are many events and actions over which we have no control .   Sharks do show up; machines malfunction; we forget to turn off the gas or to notice the ice we slip on; others are unable to stop their addictive behavior; young mothers, fathers and even children die our spouse falls in love with someone else; our boss treats us unfairly; covid-19 visits and our business folds; climate change happens causing  food shortages and other issues; a drunk driver hits us and our children die in the ensuing crash; several hurricanes visit the same area causing massive damage and resulting in many being homeless. 
 
I am sure everyone can create a list of actions over which they have no control.  I am sure that all of us have a long list of how we and others should behave.   Yet, life shows up revealing our own  humanness, that of others and the seemingly inconsiderate behavior of mother nature.  The only control we have is what we learn and how we respond.
 
The stoics divided virtue into four main types:   wisdom, justice, courage and moderation.   Wisdom was subdivided into good sense, good calculation, quick wittedness, discretion and resourcefulness. Justice is subdivided into piety, honesty, equity and fair dealing.  The stoics recognized these as goals.  Reinhold Niebuhr knew the serenity prayer was a goal which required prayer and practice.
 
Today, the lessons or truths I want to remember are.
 

• Focus my energy on what I can learn and what action is possible now.
• Drop the dualities. Do not label myself, others or events as good, bad, right or wrong.
• Be cautions of artificial constructs to avoid facing myself and my journey,  racism, sexism, homophobia, ageism, nationalism, religious self-righteousness.
• Do ask if my behavior this instant is in harmony with nature.   Am I looking at long term consequences?
• Life is a journey and not a destination
• Let go of expectation and accept what is.
• Ae I learn and relearn my understanding of wisdom, justice, courage and moderation will change.
• Laugh often.
• There are no new lessons, just new understanding of age-old lessons.

 
Written December 15, 2020
Jimmy F Pickett
coachpickett.org
 
 

Sunday Musings – December 13, 2020
 
For many around the world on this planet earth December is a month for religious celebrations.  In many of the Christian traditions this is the third Sunday of Advent.  As the third symbolic advent candle is lit some will recite I Thessalonians 5:23 “ May the God of peace sanctify you entirely; and may your spirit and soul and body be kept sound and blameless at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ. “   Jewish people are celebrating Hanukkah commemorating the re-dedication of the Second Temple in Jerusalem following the Maccabean Revolt.  As the next candle is lit with the ninth candle a prayer extoling God who performed miracles for their ancestors including the miracle of keeping the lamp burning for eight days even though there was enough oil for only one day.
 
Some Africans Americans will celebrate Kwanzaa or first fruit harvest and the seven principles or values or the African Culture.
 
Some in the world will celebrate boxing day during which the alms boxes are opened, and the contents distributed to those who need it. The Irish celebrate boxing day as St. Stephens Day. 
 
The Japanese celebrate new year’s eve as Omisoka. Families gather for one last time in the old year to have a bowl of toshikoshi-soba or toshikoshi-udon, a tradition based on eating the long noodles to cross over from one year to the next.
 
Some  will celebrate the miracle of  inclusiveness because  the god of their understanding welcomes all to the table.   Others will theoretically welcome all to the table but with lots of preconditions for who they love, how they love, who they hurt  and how they hurt them.   Some radical scientists and others will claim that none of us are in a position to judge each other or hold each other accountable for how our brains make decisions and what consequent actions we take.  Some will claim that one must worship a particular concept of god in a particular way or suffer eternal damnation.  Some will use the word evil to describe others assured that they have failed the test of this life journey and need to be put to death by the state while others should be sentenced  to prison for life or even many lifetimes.  
 
Another possible truth is that that all of us humans at times act in ways which is hurtful to ourselves, other people and mother nature.  Some of us overthink and have elaborate systems for deciding the “sin points” of ourselves and others.  Some of us will not be welcomed unless we repent and promise to support one nation but not others; support one settlement and not others; support those labeled as criminals, but not those labels as sexual offenders.  We may be sure that having sex in a loveless marriage so as to ensure financial status is moral while the person whose office does have a granite countered kitchen, but a street corner is less moral and deserves to be arrested.  We may decide that the person whose, for some reason, is only attracted to one body shape and age is ,morally superior to the person who is sexually attracted to a teenager.  We may assume one has a choice of preference while the other does not.    We may decide that the depth of the color of one’s pigment determine one’s relative worth or the ability to use the legal loopholes to ensure that one amass great financial wealth is more moral than the person who works at a minimum wage job. 
 
Other animals do not seem to think in terms of sin.  They think in terms of survival and territory..  They may be programed to be attracted to a mate which is relatively healthy. They may have little shame about how, when and where they groom each other.  I  seriously doubt that they conceptualize a God who is jealous, easily offended and attached to the concept of punishment.  .
 
As we prepare for our various human December celebrations we might allow our imaginations to think of the possibility science and common sense has a role In the design of the community we want to build and its relationship to mother nature.  We might want to celebrate our humanness as part of a larger whole.  We might want to be less quick to assume free will as we learn more about all the factors which affect how our brain functions.  We might want to consider that no one decides to be addicted, to be attracted sexually to children, have a brain which is missing the part who allows for empathy, that all of us contribute to climate change and, thus, to the forced migration of people and other animals.  We might want to think of a justice system which is focused on restoring harmony and not on creating or feeding disharmony.  We might …
 
Written December 13, 2020
Jimmy F Pickett
coachpickett.org
 

 

​Need to smell you
 
I was listening to Terry Gross interview Brittany Barnett “who works on behalf of people serving harsh prison sentences as a result of the war on drugs.  Nine of her clients have been granted clemency.  Her new memoir is A Knock at Midnight. (Fresh Air, December 9, 2020. Book available on Amazon or local public library.)
 
 She clearly articulates the cruel waste of human potential and the abject suffering which has  and continues to result from the commitment in the United States to punishing those who are ill with addiction, mental illness; often a lack of ability to consider the needs of others.  Ms. Barrett, an attorney, daughter and even former high school girlfriend of a drug dealer, discusses growing up with the addiction and the incarceration of her mother while also living  among many others who lives were kidnapped by addiction; a life cycle which validated the hopelessness which was and is branded on people from an early age.  I encourage readers to read her memoir. 
 
At an age when many businesses are failing,  the so call judicial system which includes a very profitable (for many) prison system is flourishing.  From contracts for metal everything, food supplies, personnel, and weapons to offices for police and prosecutors to legalized profiteering for use of communication with family, many amass a great deal of wealth and, thus, have a vested interest in ensuring the system stays intact.  Yet, ironically, it is you and I who pay for this system which we know does not work.  There are certainty those such as Ms. Barrett’ mother who thrive in spite of the system and not because of it.  There are also children directly affected by the system who use their scars to keep in close contact with their own humanity and to help others
 
Many scientists can now explain why humans do not learn from living with chronic stress.  In fact, neuroscientists such as Robert Sapolsky can detail the parts of the  brain which are adversely affected by chronic stress  including that caused by being mistreated.  He explains clearly how damage to various parts of the brain and other organs affect the ability to exercise what is commonly referred to as free will. 
 
When we are separated from parts of ourselves we are separated from each other.  When we are separated from each other we are separated from ourselves.  We need to experience a sense of connection/community which is our heritage.  When Ms. Barrett, as a child, visited her mother in prison with a glass shield separating them she was acutely aware of not being able to touch her mother and not being able to smell her.  The smell of our parents, especially our birth mother I suspect, is associated with our earliest experience of connection and being nurtured.  When a mother is unable,  for whatever reason, to provide that experience,  there is, I suspect, a profound loss of ability to connect with others.  When it is experienced and then taken away, as it was with Ms. Barrett, one  might close down or use that experience to work on behalf of other mothers and children who are separated,
 
It is ironic to me that at a time when we are so polarized in this and other countries we are being visited by a virus, a primary symptom of which can be the loss of a sense of smell. Smell is essential to many animals, including we humans, for alerting one to who and what is safe.  At a time when we have lost connection with each other we are unable to smell each other.
 
Spiritually this loss of the ability of smell is both a metaphor for the larger issues and a fact – although temporary if one survives covid-19.   Not only does convid-19 often affect one’s ability to smell but one must also keep one’s mouth and nose coved in public, practice social distance and, thus, avoid the scent of each other.  As we move toward a vaccine we must identify and remove the economic, political, social and spiritual barriers we have erected to separate us from each other  We must smell the scent which tell us we are home, and we must smell the scent which tells us we have created a world in which fear of each other is often the norm.   Labeling and incarcerating those with an illness and those whose brain damage has rendered them unable to make choices based on what benefits the greater good is itself a symptom of the loss of our ability to smell each other; to smell the scent which says, “welcome home”.
 
Written December 11, 2020
Jimmy F Pickett, LPC, AADC
coachpickett, org
 
 

​My favorite things
 
Richard Rogers wrote the song My Favorite Things which Julie Andrews sang in the hit musical, The Sound of Music.
The song begins “Raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens”.   As the world lives under the cloud of the pandemic many may be reevaluating their list of favorite things.  As the United States gets ready to inaugurate a new president; as parents, spouses, siblings and others who have lost a loved one to covid 19, addiction, an automobile accident, and some seemingly “untimely” death the list of favorite things may be much different than it was a year ago.
 
Home for many has become a workplace as well as the school or education hub and a prison of sorts for others.  For some, sharing space 24 hours a day, 7 days a week has been a wonderful luxury.  For others it may feel like a bit too much togetherness.  For many others, especially health care and other essential workers, home has become a place where one collapses after yet another double or even triple shift.   One may barely remember what it is like to enjoy a relaxing time at home.   For still others whose loved one(s) has died home is a constant reminder or film of what was or what one wants to remember or imagine was the script.
 
Many has spent time during the pandemic sorting through and getting rid of “stuff” stored in basements, attics, closets and numerous drawers.  Still others or perhaps the same ones have  welcomed a new pet which was rescued from a shelter.  Bikes and board games have been summoned out of retirement and recreated what may, for some (especially the privileged white, “middle class”) was a less complicated time.
 
In the midst of all these changes  new lists of favorite things are being penned.  For those lucky few who have the luxury of living even slightly outside the circle of basic survival the list of favorite things has changed since March.  For those living on the edge of survival the list is also different.
 
Being able to articulate a list of favorite things – a list of what is really important – is one of the gifts of those who have the luxury of a spiritual practice.   In the story of The Christmas Carol Scrooge discovers that his underpaid clerk, Bob Cratchit and his family which includes Tiny Tim whose dance of life is on crutches are far richer that he is. 
 
Many religions celebrate this time of the year some version of a new birth or new beginning.   For some the advent of the new calendar is another occasion to evaluate what is important in this brief life dance.
 
The visit of covid-19 could serve to remind us how important it is to daily be intentional about what is important.  Perhaps how well we love ourselves and each other; how well we share food, shelter, health care and other resources may become a few of our favorite things.   Daily or hourly I am reminded that this life dance is very brief.   Mary Poppins in The Sound of Music is perhaps not a theologically sophisticated paradign but perhaps, just perhaps, it is a fun reminder to show up to the simple magic of all that all that is seen and unseen; of “raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens”.
 
Written December 9, 2020
Jimmy F Pickett
coachpickett.org
 
 
 

​The Homeless Problem
 
I am sure most of us, including those who are homeless, have heard about the homeless problem.  Frequently, what is meant by the use the term is “the problem of dealing with the homeless” as opposed to “the pain and suffering of the homeless”.    When used to imply that the homeless are a problem the concerns seem to be:
 

• They make potential customers uncomfortable (frightened, guilty, helpless, hopeless).
• They make residents or potential residents of hotels, apartments or condos uncomfortable.
• They might steal.
• They might get violent.
• They might be drunk or high and harass others.
• They remind one that financial and emotional stability is tenuous at best.
• They are lazy and unwilling to work.

 
When one is implying the pain and suffering of the homeless one may be feeling:

• Responsibility for helping to ensure more shelters.
• Sad about the fact that the homeless are someone’s father, mother, brother, sister, child, aunt, uncle, or grandparent.
• Identification knowing one could be that person of family.
• Helpless.
• Empathy for those who do not feel safe being in a confined space.
• Frustration that often the homeless are addicts or those with other mental illness who are labeled as criminals.

 
There are many reasons individuals, or a family might be homeless including loss of income, mental illness, addiction, loss of faith that one can create a meaningful life, anger at “the system”, overwhelming grief, acute PTSD from trauma such as combat, domestic violence,  or sexual battery which leaves one unable to function.
 
I certainly understand the discomfort of being confronted with the reality of facing the person blocking the entrance to one’s home or business.  I understand being so weary and overwhelmed by injustice which leaves one barely able to face the day.  I understand not wanting to constantly be made to feel as if one is failing in one’s responsibility to care for one’s neighbor; of having to face the failing of the economic and social systems.
 
We all have days or times in our lives when we just want to do our duty or job and get home to our safe, nurturing  homes.  We all have times when we want to shut out the harsher or painful parts of reality and refuel.  We all have times when we want to act as if we have what we have because of our hard work; as long as we work hard we will have what we need just for today.
 
The cost of  viewing the homeless as a problem rather than the failings of the moral imperative to care for each other can be high;  the imperative to create systems in which we set a place at the table for everyone; in which we feel safe in making sure, as did many of our ancestors, there is always enough food for the stranger.   Part of my heritage is always making sure that there is enough food to feed whoever stops by at mealtime.    It seems as if Grandma Fannie’s generation could always perform the miracle of the  fish and the loaves. Yet, the reality is we often live in our gated communities, with our security cameras and locked doors.  We often live in “stand your ground” communities with
loaded guns protecting what seems more valuable than the life of the person whose desperation for food or the relief of the next drink other drugs is as necessary as our need to relax and feel safe for an instant or an evening.
 
This blog is not intended as a multiple-choice quiz.  It is intended as an invitation to view the homeless as one’s neighbors, father, mother, brother, sister; to accept that love demands a willingness to be uncomfortable and inconvenienced; to not have easy answers or sight blocking blinds?
 
Written December 8, 2020
Jimmy F Pickett
coachpickett.org

​Sunday Musings – December 6, 2020
 
Parenting has been dominant in my thoughts and my heart this week.  I have talked with many parents who are mourning the loss of their children due to addiction or other mental illness.  Additionally I have talked to parents whose children are living in a domestic violent situations.  There are also us parents whose children are choosing to not have any relationship with us.  My own son who just had his 50th birthday on Friday has made that later choice. He chooses not to tell me what prompted this most recent decision although I am well aware of past decisions including the divorce from his mother which deeply affected his childhood.  
 
 Even though I had not planned to have a child, once my wife and I became pregnant I determined I would be the best possible parent. This desire is true for most of us.  Even if we did not have the little house with a white pickett fence and all the emotional and financial resources of The Brady Bunch, Leave it to Beaver or some other movie in our head., we “knew” that we did not want to repeat the mistakes of our parents or any of  “those other parents”.   We probably begin parenthood with the delusion that baring natural disasters, we were in charge of the set design and the script for our family. 
 
Within days of bringing a child home from the  hospital we became aware of just how powerless we were. Occasionally we were able to halt the discomfort of our child by feeding him or her, by changing a diaper, or by rocking them to sleep.  At times, taking them for a midnight ride in the car would seem to lull them to sleep.   Often, however, we were reminded that many forces, including their decisions, were beyond our control.   Many of us had or were coming to terms with the fact that we were also powerless over our spouse, our co-workers, and our friends.  They all made independent decisions even when we knew what they “should do”.   If we were lucky we  had or would soon own the fact we also continued to make independent decisions regardless of the best advice of parents, mentors, teachers, favorite wise aunts or uncles or even that wise inner voice.
 
At some point we may have made semi peace with the seemingly conflicting truths of the six degrees of separation which reminds one that every action affects the entire universe and life happens no matter what we do.  Many of us may have “heard” which did not mean we “heard” that the only power we have in this life journey is acceptance  (1) of our humanness and that of others, (2) the fact we gain power by accepting powerlessness and (3) the fact that the most important power is unconditional love . Unconditional love demands that we let go of conditions and expectations for our love.  We honor the journey of others, including our children, no matter what.  We may set some boundaries - access to our bank account or even to our homes - but we do so with love and without judgments.   No matter what we love. This does mean we allow an active addict who is violent into our homes. This does not mean we keep incurring debt or accept abuse, but it does mean that we never lose sight of the fact that (1) we are powerless (2) we are never in a position to judge (we cannot live in the mind of the other person) and (3)the behavior of others is not about us.  This later point is essential.  Even when the behavior is directed at us we are not causing a person to act in a certain way. We may or may not have reinforced the unhealthy behavior in the past but we are not responsible for the choices of our children and others we love.
 
Once again I am reminded of Bigger Thomas in Richard Wright’s Native Son when we says to the police who are threatening him, “You can’t do nothin except kill me and that aint’s nothin.”    Just as we cannot control or determine the behavior of another, no one can stop us from loving unconditionally - no matter what.


Written December 6, 2020
Jimmy F Pickett
coachpickett.org
 

​When 1 plus 1 does not equal 2
 
Most of us have had the experience of thinking we are going to have a logical discussion but find out that we are unable to comprehend the logic of the person with whom we are talking.   Such has been my experience on several occasions when discussing the use of face masks with other individuals.   I understand those who let me know how their PTSD is making it difficult, and perhaps impossible, for them to wear a mask without the mask triggering an anxiety or even panic attack.  I also understand when a history of asthma or other breathing issues make it impossible.  I get very confused when someone here in the United States cites the second amendment as protecting their right to not wear a mask.  I have heard this “reason” given on a number of occasions.  One night this week when attending a virtual meeting comprised of so called educated, successful people the question of mandating the wearing of masks in public spaces arose.   One attendee said he does normally wear a mask but will do so if his not wearing one makes others uncomfortable.   One of the other attendees, a female businesswoman, cited The Second Amendment to the Constitution as protecting her right to not wear a mask in public spaces.  As has been the case when others used this reason,  I was mystified.  I again googled the wording of The Second Amendment to make sure my aged mind was recalling it correctly.  Just as I remembered, it states:
 
            A well-regulated Militia, being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear Arms, shall not be infringed.”
 
Although I disagree with those who quote this amendment as supporting the right to carry – even open carry – arms into most public places I understand how they might apply this amendment to that argument.  It is not my intent in this blog to argue for or against that reasoning.
 
I am mystified by the defense of using this amendment to defend one’s argument that they have a right to potentially infect others with covid- 19 or have the right to deliberately expose themselves to the virus and, thus, further burden the health care system.   Are they suggesting that they have the right to shoot me if I request they wear a mask?  I certainly hope that is not the case and, yet, given the assertive, often apparently angry response, I am not entirely sure.
 
More likely their assertive, even angry, use of the second amendment has nothing to do with the second amendment.   Their response is likely related to either (1) anxiety triggered by wearing a mask which cannot be directly linked to a trauma they are willing to share, (2)  A sincere belief that covid-19 is not more dangerous than the normal flue which kills a  significant number of people or  (3) a history of being told what to do as if they were not entitled to an opinion or to make a decision for themselves.  I suspect that what they are really saying is, “Please don’t treat me like an idiot. Please don’t act as if you always know better.  I will not allow you to tell me what to do.  
 
I understand reason 1 but would appreciate individuals saying this.  Reason (2) tells me that they have been convinced that the dangers of covid-19 are a part of fake news or that the protection of masks are fake news. Again, although that is not my belief at least there is some logic in the mind of the person refusing to wear a mask.
 
Reason three makes sense if I assume the person using the second amendment as a reason to not wear a mask does not possess the skills of self-awareness to articulate the real reason (even to themselves) or does not feel safe in sharing their history of being treated as if their feelings or thoughts do not matter. 
 
All the potential reasons require the listener to use the musical concept of transposing to understand what the person is really saying or rather what they are not saying.  The danger is, of course, that one is experienced as being patronizing  - of not accepting at face value what the person is saying.  Of course, I do not need to say to the person, “I think this is what you are really saying.”   That would certainly be experienced as patronizing.  It is enough to know that, at some level, there is a logic for not wearing a mask which is not being clearly heard by this listener.    It is also important to accept that I often communicate in a way which does not make sense or compute to other.  Often the language or words we use have a connection which is only understood in the context of our own emotional history.   In one’s  emotional life 1 plus 1 does not have to equal two; at least not on the surface level.
 
Written December 3, 2020
Jimmy F Pickett
coachpickett.org
 

Covid and energy budget
 
Daily I talk to individuals who are reporting what seem to be symptoms of clinical depression.  Some of these individuals have a history of clinical depression. It is not unusual for those with such a history to report increased symptoms during the fall and the spring when the body is attempting to adjust the internal temperature to synch with the external temperature.  Some individuals are also particularly vulnerable to the lack of sunlight in some areas of the country.
 
This year those with a history of clinical depression are often reporting more acute depression which often may not be responding to medication.  Many who do not have a history of depression are reporting symptoms which seem, on the surface, to be unrelated to situational events.  They are reporting increased tiredness, lack of joy, being easily irritated, feeling emotional (anger, tears, impatience, anxiety,  feeling overwhelmed), more difficulty focusing, detached,  low libido, and a host of other indications that their body is not happy.  When the body is not happy it does not function as well.    Many of us pride ourselves in functioning well at work and at home.  Not functioning well increases one’s feeling of “dis ease”.
 
Many of these symptoms are a healthy response to living with the direct and indirect effects of Covid-19. Our bodies are not designed to live long term in crisis mode.  Some of the best studies of what happens to the body when it is subjected to high stress for long periods of time has been done with those who live in combat conditions for prolonged periods of time.  Medical personnel have tracked the gradual breaking down of the organs and systems in the body when living  with chronic stress.  Those living with domestic violence, in other active combat situations, in negative work environments, in poverty or the constant fear of poverty, chronic physical pain and other ongoing stressful situations will report a variety of physical and emotional symptoms,
 
Living in a pandemic means:
 

• Less physical contact /nurturing.
• Constant vigilance.
• Threats to housing, availability of food or otherwise being able to take care for family.
• Physical illness and/or threat of same.
• Increased domestic violence.
• Increased use of alcohol and other forms of self-medication.
• Illness and death of friends, colleagues and family.
• Not having rituals such as funerals, weddings, graduations, birthday celebrations, and other supportive gatherings.
• No childcare such as school.
• Teaching responsibilities for ill prepared parents and other care givers.
• Postponement of legal proceeding.
• Closed or restricted treatment facilities for such illnesses as addiction.
• More deaths  - covid-19, addiction or other illnesses.
• Less access to health care.
• Less ability to examine patients in person.
• Exhaustion; especially of health care workers, teachers, parents and others.
• Politicalization  of covid-19 issues leading to increased polarization
• Less access to healthy food.

 
The results of these chronic stressors as the pandemic continues to kidnap our lives leads to what I am diagnosing as empty gas tanks.  In many cases not much can be done to refuel although just recognizing and being able to verbalize how one is being affected – albeit from a safe social distance – is helpful.   Knowing that there is an end in sight will be comforting and helpful to some.  Accepting that healing from acute trauma is a long-term process - that help may be available - is reassuring to many.
 
Medication may, for some, be a helpful way to regulate sleep, appetite and other symptoms.  The problem is that  often in order to prescribe medication or to bill insurance for therapy will require a diagnosis.   Labeling the symptoms as clinical depression will often insure that treatment is covered by insurance companies, but that diagnosis can also affect access to other resources such as life insurance.   Most important it is not accurate.   Physician, counselors and patients will also want to explore other, available ways of taking care of oneself emotionally, physically, spiritually and nutritionally.   Most important is being able to share what is going on and to know that the body is responding “in a healthy manner” to an unhealthy set of circumstances.
 
Written December 1, 2020
Jimmy F Pickett
coadhpickett.org