​Embracing change
 
After living in many other cities such as Chicago, Washington, D.C., Juneau, Princeton, and most recently in the charming town of Dunedin, Florida, I have now returned to my adopted home of Wheeling.  
 
I had been following some of the changes which had been happening in Wheeling since I left two years ago:  Preparation for the offices of The Health Plan, apartments in the old Stone building, reclaiming the Boury building and the ongoing revival of the Center Market area.  I had also heard about the new mayor and many new city council members.    All of these changes joined the gems of Wheeling such as the Wheeling Symphony, the amazing number of talented artists, and the foresight and energy of such individuals as Susan and Bill Hogan.  There are also the new indoor tennis courts at Wheeling Park and the ongoing beauty and many attractions of Oglebay. 
 
Further, I noted, with much relief, that finally the Human Rights Commission seems to have gotten more determined to push the city to add the LGBT (lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender) part of the community to the protected group of people.  I was, at first, discouraged to hear that the mayor and some council members are promising to move slowly with the wording of such a change.  My first impulse was to say, “Really.  What is there to study?  Many cities have had such inclusive protection in place for many years. They have worked out the wording.  Goggle some of them and just copy what has proven to work legally and morally.  This is not difficult in 2016.  Wheeling does not have to wait on the state to acknowledge that the LGTBT community is a significant part of the economic and creative heart of the city.  Not only is it the right thing to do, one cannot claim to want economic progress while passively endorsing discrimination.    Do you people really not know that the LGBT community is not going to continue to contribute their money and talent to the community without an open declaration that the city of Wheeling is committed to being inclusive?   Yes, we realize that the public stance against racism has not always proven effective, but that may be because it often did not feel as if the heart of the city “leaders’ was behind this commitment.  Let’s get with it Wheeling.   Either we are inclusive or we are not.”
 
I did not say that. I am well aware that many of us, even when we know change has to come, are fearful of change.  We know that change often forces us to look at many parts of ourselves and not just the single issue being currently addressed.  The cocoons in which we try to live may be an illusion, but it feels safer to hold on to them than it does to open to the possibility that much of what we considered to be sacred truths are not, after all, sacred. Whether in the field of physics, astronomy, medicine religion or business, we are increasingly invited to move outside our comfort zone.  While we may applaud some changes such as the exciting research into treatment for blindness and other chronic diseases we thought to be incurable or untreatable, we also know that opening those possibilities opens up other possibilities.  Nothing is what it seemed to be.   It does not matter that it was the Pre-Socratic philosopher Heraclitus who reminded us that “You cannot step into the same river twice.” and that change is inevitable.   In the case of cities, change is either in the direction of furthering death or opening to a new concept of village.   Like it or not, all around the world humans are discovering or rediscovering an old truth:  Our lives are much improved when we live as a village celebrating our differences while embracing our ability to take care of each other.
 
We must help to soothe the pain of change while moving forward. Formally acknowledging that Wheeling cannot move forward without the support and participation of the LGBT community, women, people of color, people of all religious beliefs, people of all ages, all abilities and all degrees of mental health is a moral and economic imperative.
 

written October 9, 2016

​What if work was play?
 
I have often thought about the distinction between work and play.  This  has also led me to think about the concept of retirement.   Certainly I know that there are times when many of us have to quit doing a certain job because it is no longer physically or mentally possible to do it.  Also the product or the skill to make a certain product may be become obsolete thus resulting in the need to help create, manufacture or market another product.   Further, I understand the fact that many of us may associate work with earning a living – finding a way to put food on the table, pay for housing, and pay for all the other services and material goods which an individual or a family may need to survive and prepare the children or the injured person to take care of themselves and possibly a family.  I know many men and women have done a job which was in a negative atmosphere and possibly injurious to their physical and mental health because they had no other way to attempt to take care of themselves and their families at the level that they wanted or desired. Still others work for a very low wage at a job which is back breaking, pays very little and seemingly unappreciated – a job which sometimes allows someone else to get rich.  For example, depending on whether one is looking at statistics collected by a government entity or a research facility interested in how well farm workers are getting paid, one finds an enormous variance.  On one site the highest average wage for farm workers was $21,000.00.   On a  site which recruits farm workers one find the promise of incomes two to three times that high. I choose farm worker because I have had some experience working on farms as a child and while in graduate school.  I did not earn very much, but I always knew that a farm job with a low wage was temporary while I was on my way to something which was not as physically demanding and which paid enough to live.  There were often times I enjoyed the work. In fact much of my life I have been blessed to find some measure of fun and enjoyment in whatever job I was doing at that time.  Still, if I had thought that I had to do backbreaking, hard labor for minimum wage  the rest of my life, I would think of it as work and not play.
 
Many people I know have “retired” only to return to work at their former occupation or profession. Many others have taken part-time jobs doing something less stressful than their former jobs. Still others have assumed the responsibility of caring for grandchildren part-time or even full time.  Many are taking care of ailing parents or  signing up for even more volunteer work.   Some are taking courses offered for a minimal fee at local colleges.   Then, of course, there are those who are fleeing wars, famine and other conditions without the benefit of retirement funds. They will be starting new jobs, often outside their professional training, to support themselves and their families. Retirement is not a consideration.
 
No matter what our choices regarding work for direct pay, most of us will still be cleaning house, grocery shopping, doing laundry, cooking, paying bills and taking care of family, friends and neighbors.   We may not think of these tasks as work.  We may need to remind ourselves of the basic definition of work from the standpoint of physics.  Wikipedia gives an excellent brief overview of the definition of work:
 
The work done by a constant force of magnitude F on a point that moves a displacement (not distance) s in the direction of the force is the product.
W = Fs
“For example, if a force of 10 newtons (F = 10 N) acts along a point that travels 2 metres (s = 2 m), then it does the work W = (10 N)(2 m) = 20 N m = 20 J. This is approximately the work done lifting a 1 kg weight from ground to over a person's head against the force of gravity. Notice that the work is doubled either by lifting twice the weight the same distance or by lifting the same weight twice the distance.
Work is closely related to energy. The work-energy principle states that an increase in the kinetic energy of a rigid body is caused by an equal amount of positive work done on the body by the resultant force acting on that body. Conversely, a decrease in kinetic energy is caused by an equal amount of negative work done by the resultant force.”
 
Thus it is clear that technically most of one’s activity including that which we label as play is work whether or not one is paid to do it.  It is probably also clear to us that much of the activity one does is done voluntarily and, hopefully, often joyfully.  
 
It would seem that the distinction between work and play gets more blurred the more we separate it from the  particular job we do to earn a living. According to many studies, a high percentage of individuals report being unhappy at their jobs.  A 2014 Gallup study revealed that:
 
The other findings of Gallup's 2013 State of the American Workplace report were grim; at best, 30% of the 150,000 full and part-time workers surveyed honestly enjoyed their jobs and their bosses.  (reported in nydailynews.com (June 24, 2014) and in such magazines as Forbes).
 
Thus, we are not really talking about the distinction between work and play, but the distinction many make between their paid work (jobs) and their non-paid work. Many of those to whom I talk do not report dissatisfaction with their non-paid work although many do report feeling overwhelmed and isolated at times.  The overwhelmed feeling seems to be related to the isolation.  There is often no one with whom to share the work of parenting or maintaining a home. Even if there are two people in a home carrying for children, one or both are employed outside the home. They report that they feel they seldom, if ever, get a break. When exhausted, work may become as unsatisfying as the paid job.  On the other hand, when reasonably rested, one might find great joy in child care, planning and preparing a meal, house cleaning or lawn care.   If done with someone else who is also feeling good then one can play with the other person and incidentally clean house, do yard work or fix a meal.
 
I once suggested to family when they come home from a very long day of school, jobs, and evening school activities, i.e. sporting events, that they spend some time together visiting while they incidentally fix a meal.  Often what had been happening was that the family would come home exhausted and someone in the family would volunteer  to fix a darn heathy meal for the darn family. Other family members might start laundry or do some other home chores.  By the time the family ate no one was in a good mood and no one got much nutritional value out of the meal no matter how healthy the ingredients.    When they focused on visiting  and incidentally fixing a meal together everyone enjoyed the time together and undoubtedly got more nutritional value out of the meal.
 
It seems to me that most people I know do not mind working.  Unless a mental or physical disease gets in the way, most people seem to want to be a part of something larger than themselves and, thus, want to know how they can contribute to the overall system.   When one feels as if one is being treated with respect and, thus, valued one will give 150% to a respective work task.  Margaret Heffernan and others have clearly outlined how to design a job environment which maximizes teamwork and the value of every member of the team.  In that atmosphere I am willing to wager that most enjoy their work, are productive, and take fewer sick days.  The long term profit of the company is greater than when a company focuses on treating employees as machines who can easily be used up and replaced.  Co-workers are, unless some other issue gets in the way, playful with each other and more creative in how they approach every task related to the job. Work becomes play.
Perhaps we need to remind ourselves of the purpose of play.   We may associate playing with children.  Those who have spent time around young children know that play involves exploring themselves, the world around them and the interaction of the two.  All healthy children are naturally “little scientists.” They are not focused on competition with others but on doing their best to achieve each goal they set.  Of course, children have no idea of some of the dangers inherent in exploring sharp object, stairs,  fire or other potential danger and, thus, need some guidance.  Children can explore for hours and get very excited about every discovery about themselves, the world they inhabit and the interaction of the two.
 
I think it is possible to create job environments which require and reward our ability and need to play.  Obviously, I am not talking about spending job time playing unrelated video games, watching pornography or otherwise just distracting oneself. I am suggesting performing a job with the goal of exploring how we and our co-workers can do the best job possible, create a product of which one can be proud and which one knows will serve the larger community. This then is both play and work.  We will, I know, continue to move beyond many of the jobs which require threats to the health and welfare of individuals. Still, as did slaves or those in concentration camps, one can use the song and a sense of community to make the job as pleasurable as possible.
In short, I think we can and need to continue to use the concept of play to create job environments which enhance rather than destroy the lives of those performing the particular task.
 
Written October 8, 2016

​
School Bells – Current Affairs – Grade 1 – Week 8

As always I am excited to meet with my adopted niece Sam’s first grade class.  The subject this week is friendships.  What are they?  How do we feed them?  My intention is to get the young people and their families talking about how relationships such as friendships affect and are affected by current affairs.  I know that this week many of the young people have relatives  who are living in the path of the Hurricane Matthew. Sam’s grandparents arrived a couple of days ago to stay with her family and they are fine.   They have many other friends and some relatives who are still in Florida.  When there is something such as a hurricane threatening the homes, the lives and the livelihood of millions of people it is easier to make relationships a priority.

Here are the students now.

Me:  Good morning class.  How are you?

Class:  We are fine!  We want cookies?

Me:  Oh!  Everyone focusing on cookies. I wonder who thought of that?

No response?   At any rate, no cookies today, but I will bring some next week.  How is everyone?

Sam:  Everyone is worried about all the people who Matthew is chasing out of their homes.  Mamma and Pop Pop are staying with us, but their house might be floating.  They have a  lot of friends who are staying in sh…

Me: Shelters?

Sam:  Yes. That is it Uncle Jim.  Some of the shelters are in churches or other places which are safer.   

Tara:   My aunt and uncle were in Hatti with some other people from their church to help  build some new houses and then the storm came.  We have not heard from them. I am very scared Mr. Jim.

Me: Yes, that is scary.

Steve:  My cousins were at Disney and they had to come home early. They were very sad and thought that the storm was exciting.  How can it be exciting when so many people are in danger?

Tommy:  When I get older I want to fly one of those planes that chase storms.

Sophia:  Yes, I think that would be fun.

Me:  Some of those people help us learn more about the storms.
It seems like we are already talking about the subject for today which was friendships.  What are they and how do we feed them?  Let’s start there? What is a friendship?

Sam:  It is when someone is always there to talk and to give you a glass of milk and something to eat like you do Paul and I, Uncle Jim.

Tara:  It is like knowing that even if you get mad at someone they will still share their lunch when you forget yours.

Steve:  When I get scared I get into bed with my parents and they make it safe.

Sofia:  When I feel sad, my dog, ginger climbs on my lap.

Me:  What shall we write on the board?  Friendships are:

•    Listening.
•    Making it safe.
•    Being there when someone is scared or sad.

Ahmes:  It is making someone feel welcome when they come from Egypt to here.

Me: Say more about that Ahmes.

Ahmes:  We had heard that a lot of people in the United States do not like people like us and no one here seemed to know we were different.

Me:  So they noticed that you were more like them then different from them.

Ahmes: Yes.  No one said anything about us being Muslims or from Egypt and looking different.  We feel safe here.

Me:  That is wonderful.  I am so glad.  So friendships focus on ways we are like each other and not just ways we are different.

Sam:  But, Uncle Jim, we learn a lot from each other and also learn a lot about ourelves.

Me: That is true Sam.   You seem to be saying that when we are focused on becoming friends we see differences as an opportunity to learn and not something to be frightened of.

Sue:  Other people in class help me when I need it but do not assume that I am dumb because I am in a wheelchair.

Me: Wonderful. Are you saying that other people in class do not treat you as if you are just a sick person or a person with an illness.

Sue: That is it Mr Jim.

Susie:  When I am having a tough day my dad turns off the stove where he is cooking dinner, makes me a hot chocolate and just listens.

Me:   Wow.  So listening is more important than the task of cooking dinner. That is  very important isn’t it?

Susie:   It makes me feel better.

Me:  So friendship does not seem to mean buying toys, clothes or other things. It seems it has more to do with taking time to listen, to just be there no matter what else one had planned.

Tara:  Last night on the television they were talking about how much  better we take care of each other when there is bad storm or something.

Me: That does seem to be true, doesn’t it. I wonder why that is?

Steve:  A storm, fire, death of a parent or someone is like a giant walking into the room. It is tough to ignore.

Me:  That is very observant Steve.  I love your example. Did you know that when we compare one thing to another like comparing something like a storm to a giant is called an analogy.  Here, I will write the word on the board.

Susie: Can we only have friendships when the giant makes us scared Mr. Jim?

Me: We seem to do that sometimes.  It seems as if it is easy to forget to take care of each other when we are busy with work or school or even playing.  Susie you seem to be asking if we can remember to take care of each other even when the giant is not there.

Susie:  Can we Mr. Jim.

Me:  I think all of you have made each other feel welcome and important.  Every time I meet with you listen to each other and are very helpful to each other no matter how different you are in some ways.

Ahmes:  It does not seem as if Mrs. Clinton and Mr. Trump do that. When we get to be adults do we have to treat each other mean Mr. Jim?

Me:  I don’t think so.  Do you think that if adults treat other as well as you and your families seem to treat each other we would make a less violent world?

Tommy: But we would still have storms and stuff.

Me:  Yes, we would but we would not need a storm to remind us to take care of each other and that we are more alike than different.

Tara:  So we feed friendships by making them important all the time Mr. Jim?

Me:  Sure sounds that way.   Wow, you children are so smart and loving. I am very impressed.

Sam:  You say that every week Uncle Jim but then you do not always bring cookies.

Me: Ahh.  Good try Sam.  Sometimes the reward for doing well is just knowing we did well, but I do think you deserve cookies next week.

Class:  Yea!

Me:  Okay for next week, how talk about the lessons in the story the Wizzard of Oz.   Here are the slips to take home.   Steve and Tara will you pass the out please.

Steve and Tara pass them out.  

Ring! Ring! Ring!

Me. Thanks everyone. I hope we find ways to help all those affected by the storm and will hope all your relatives are okay.

Written October 7, 2016

​School Bells – Current Affairs – Grade 8 – Week 8
 
Tuesday, October 4 I met with the 8th grade students for the 8th time this semester to discuss current affairs.  I had suggested that the students talk with their families about the fact that there is so much violence in families  - a place which we want to think of as our safe places.  I have put the following statistics from the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence (ncadv.org) on the board:

• Every 9 seconds in the US a woman is assaulted or beaten.
• In the United States, an average of 20 people is physically abused by intimate partner every minute.
• 1 in 3 women and 1 in 4 men have been physically abused by an intimate partner
• 1 in 5 women and one in 7 men have been severely physically abused by an intimate partner.
• Domestic violence results in lost days off work
• Domestic violence increases health care cost – mental and physical
• Domestic violence increases need for and cost of police and court costs
• Domestic violence affects both parenting and how children function in school
• Domestic violence also escalates into murder.
• Domestic violence is present in all socio-economic and professional groups.
• Domestic violence against men is also very common although reported a little less often than for women.

I do not want to overwhelm the students with information. I also want to be very  aware of how the students are doing during this discussion. The chances are that one or more of the students live with or have experienced domestic violence at home, from a friend or from someone they have been dating.
Here comes the class now.
Me: Good morning class.
Class:  Good morning Mr. Jim.
Me:  Before we start on the topic does anyone have any other concerns.
Paul:  My family and I were worried about my grandparents who live in Florida near where the hurricane is going to visit.  They arrived last night and will stay with us until it is safe for them to return.  We are glad that they are here.
Will:   My cousins  were supposed to go to Disney tomorrow but now are not going.
Susie:  My Aunt and Uncle are near Tampa and should be okay but I am still worried. That is a really, really big wind!
Me:  It certainly is.  I certainly hope that everyone you know is safe. Many churches and other organizations will be having fund raisers to help folks in Hatti and other places where a lot of people have lost their homes.  I hope all of us will help in any way we can.
Did everyone have a chance to talk to their families about the topic of domestic violence?  What does the term domestic violence mean?
Ann:  It means violence from family members or other people we know.
Me: Yes, I think that is a good definition.  So it can mean someone we live with, someone who is visiting or even someone we are dating. It can mean someone we are temporarily living with such as with other people in a dorm room or even a tent or  building we are sharing with others such as in the military.
Will: Are those numbers on the board accurate Mr. Jim.
Me:  Yes, even though I am not sure what year they were gathered.  I checked a news site and some other sites for 2015 and the numbers were about the same.
Will: That is scary Mr. Jim.
Me:  Yes it is.  So 1/3 of the women in this class and at least ¼ of the men in this class will experience domestic violence of some sort.  Let’s just count off from 1 to 3.
The class quickly counts off.
Me:  Okay.  All the threes get over here.  All the threes will experience domestic violence.   Even if we make it the number reported for men that is still a lot of us.  It seems in this class that all of us treat each other really well. How is it possible that some of us will get violent with someone we know and possibly love and some of us will experience the violence?
John:  In our family it is not okay to hit. Even when I hit my sister once I had to apologize and I had to give a speech to the whole family at dinner about why it was wrong and why it happened. That was really embarrassing
Me: Do you want to share what you said John?
 
John: Well I said I was sorry and that it was not right to hit no matter what.
Me: What did you say about why you hit her John.
John: Oh!  At first I said I hit her because she made me so mad! She took a magazine from under my mattress and showed my parents. I was really embarrassed.
Me: That would certainly upset most of us.
John:  I was really mad and thought if I hit her she would not do it again.
Me:  Ahh. So you wanted to control her actions in the future?  Can we write on the board that control is one of the purposes of domestic violence?
Ann:  But was it because he was afraid of getting embarrassed again?
John:  Yes, I did not want anyone to know I was reading that magazine?
Ann:  Mr. Jim is the reason fear or control?
Me:  Great question.
Paul:  John, did you want to control because you were afraid of it happening again.
John:  Yes.
Me:   What did your family say about not respecting privacy or about the magazine.
John:  I did not get into trouble because of the magazine although the family said we would talk about the use of pornography sometime. I do not want to do that. My sister also had to write a paper about respecting privacy and then also read it to the family at dinner.
Me:  Do all of us get mad and feel like hitting someone or something some of the time?
Susie:  I get mad at myself when I get a bad grade because I did not do my homework.
Abdul:  I get mad when someone makes fun of my religion.
Will:  I get really mad when someone is mean to my animal.
Ann:  I get mad when my parents treat me like a child.
Me:  I sometimes get mad when I make a mistake or am someone is mistreating a child.  Sometimes when I am really tired I get mad more quickly.
Paul:  In our family we talked about getting grumpy if any of us are tired, hungry or both. Sometimes when we go to the amusement park and come home late we are really grumpy with each other. That does not make sense since we had a really fun day. Why is that Uncle Jim?
Me:  I think when we are tried, hungry, or even worried our brain says it wants to be on vacation because we have not fed it with food, rest or a solution. When our brains have feels overloaded it I think we may unconsciously use anger to push away more work for her brain. Is anger a pushing away behavior?
Ann: Yes, I do not want to get close to anyone when they are angry
Me:  So the anger can be a way to try to control giving the brain more jobs to do.  Shall we write over loaded brain on the list of causes or reasons why we get angry?
Class:  Yes. Tried brain!
Me:  So it is easy to see why we get angry. How  does anger lead to violence?
Abdul:  If we think the other person causes us to be angry we want to make them stop.
Ann:  Sometimes it feels good to hit something when I am angry. I am sorry afterwards.
Me:  The hitting can be something to so with the angry frustration.
Susie: Does not make it right Mr. Jim?
John:  I do not think it is right but if someone is really our enemy it is okay to kill them.
Me: John you have raised another issue which I think need to talk about but let’s stick to domestic violence for now.   The family is not our enemy.
Will:  My sister is!
Me: I am sure it feels that way sometimes but what how would you feel if someone tried to hurt your sister Will?
Will: I would get really mad.
Me: Even though she is your enemy Will?
Will:  She is not but it feels that way some of the time Mr. Jim.
Me: I am hearing the class say that fear and control are two of the emotions which can lead to domestic violence. If that is true that we need to think about what else, we can do when we are fearful or feel like we want or need to control a person or a situation.  We are not going to have time to do that today, but let’s do that next week.  Let me write down the assignment and make copies.
I quickly type out:   What are acceptable, non-harmful ways to deal with emotions such as fear and anger?  What can we do when our brain is too tired to think or do any more work for the day?
Then I make copies.
Me;  Susie and Tom: will you pass these out please.
Susie and Tom take the slips and pass the out.
Me: Great job class. Have a good week.  I hope no one gets hurt with the hurricane.
Ring!  Ring!  Ring!
Written October 6, 2016
 
 
 

​The amazing thought process
 
I have previously written about factors which affect brain function which then determines how our body function.  Scientists are now beginning to isolate the parts of the brain which affect and are affected by various factors. Scientists are now often discovering what we thought was true may contains only a small kernel of truth.   For example, I was recently read it now appears that attention deficit disorder and learning disorder may be two unrelated conditions but conditions which never-the-less co-exist.
 
I find it fascinating that some of the research about how the brain functions is being done with fruit flies.  It is very difficult for me to imagine that the fruit fly has a brain which can be examined much less tell us anything about the human brain.   Yet, as Dr. David Anderson reveals in his Ted Talk of March 2013 “Your brain is more than a bag of chemicals”  scientists are indeed using fruit flies to identify specific neurons and specific regions of the brain  responsible for particular functions.  These discoveries in turn lead to being able to identify differences in the brain of individual who have certain disorders.
 
For those interested  google Dr. Anderson’s Ted Talk and other talks and papers he has delivered.   There are also other individuals such as Allan Jones who are conducting some amazing brain research.
 
I was thinking about the thought process which allows such people as Dr. Jones, Dr. Anderson and many others to even consider the possibility that one might more  learn more about the brain and that one can use fruit flies who have a very tiny brain to research this subject.  Their thought process must include some amazing assumptions:

• Brains of humans are not all the same.
• One can potentially identify very specific parts of the brain which malfunction and affect behavior possibilities.
• Behavior is directed by the brain and thus affected by the capability of  the brain of the actor in a particular point in time.
• Chemical differences might not be the only differences in the brains of those who experience life through the prism of depression or other brain diseases.
• It is possible that fruit flies have complex brains.
• It is possible to study to very tiny brains including the neurons of the fruit fly.
• One can convince a funding source that it is worthwhile to study the brains of fruit flies.

 
One could, I am sure think of many more assumptions which have to be made by scientists such as Dr. Anderson.   I have long been fascinated by the brains of people who are able to think so far out of the thought process than most of us are able to do.
 
I recall as a very young child thinking about individuals such as Dr. Alexander Graham Bell and others who were exploring the possibility of what we now call the telephone.  I tried to imagine how the voice sprouted little legs entered the mouthpiece of the old fashions telephone, jumped on the wire and then along with millions of other little voices with legs quickly ran across the wire until they jumped out of the transmitter of another phone and into the ears and then the brain of another person.  I wondered why a person would even have such outrageous, cartoon character-like thoughts.  I had similar questions about the little creatures who jumped out of a generator onto another wire and caused lights, machines and other inanimate objects to come to life.
 
I suppose it was this wonder and appreciations for the possibility of such magic which first allowed me to question the concept of free will and imagine we would one day be able to identify factors which caused humans to act in a certain way.   I recall  seeing a cousin who had what was then called shell shock and how that affected his ability to function.  I also recall a sister of my high functioning grandmother and her other siblings.  This sister was a long-time resident – lifelong? – of the state mental hospital.  If memory serves me correctly she believed herself to be queen of Britain.   I suspect that this was a common assumption (delusion) of strong, independent leaning, early feminist women who filled the wards of state mental hospitals.  Be that as it may, it was clear to me that she did not make a conscious decision to be delusional.  I also observed the vast difference in the thought and, thus, behavior of many other family members.   My Aunt Please and Uncle Harold seem to take life in stride and to always find the positives in a situation, in each other and in other people.  Other relatives seemed, on the other hand, to experience life much differently. 
 
Even as a young person, it seemed obvious to me that some behavior such as racism  was learned.  It appeared to me that it was easy to copy behavior of peers. I can recall early examples of learning how to use racism or other beliefs of adults to get out of trouble. Even as a child it seemed that I could not do this without experiencing a significant amount of what I terms guilt. Thus it seemed to me that I was in some cases making choices and, yet, others were able to make different choices.  For many years I believed that I was naturally more aware of my numerous sins and probably sinned more than the average person.
 
I noticed that each of us seemed to have our own experience of the world.  Even in our family my experience of our life was much different than that of my siblings.  It was if we lived in different families and, yet, that was not possible in the small three room house seven of us shared.
 
The problem was and is not, of course, that we experience the world differently.  The problem is that we believe that the world we experience is “the world”.  Secondarily the problem is that we often believe that the thought process is independent of differences which affect the neurons and other parts of the brain. 
This is understandable. It seems to me that I often make decisions to act in a certain way.  Already this morning I have decided to get out bed, make coffee, dress for the gym, workout, stop at the post office, make and eat breakfast, start laundry and  do some writing.  It would seem to me that I have been exercising my free will to make decisions and then direct my body to accomplish these tasks.  What could be simpler?  Yet, I am well aware that there are many who have been unable to make similar decisions and to take similar actions.  It may seem as if they have the capacity to do so but another truth may be their brain does not currently have the capacity to do so.  Although advice such as “Just do it.” might, in some cases. be helpful to the person whose brains work overtimes analyzing a  possible decision rather than taking action, there are who minds will tell them that even simple actions will result in dangerous consequences or will not make a difference in their life. There are those whose brain stays in a fugue like state which prevents the willful exercise of what we call “free will”. 
 
Thanks to individuals such as Dr. Anderson who have the ability and foresight to question assumptions or “truths” about how our brain functions we may be able in the future to more effectively treat many conditions. We may also be less willing to judge others who are not able to think and act as we do. We might even question the limits of what we call free will.
 
 
Written October 5, 2016
 
 

​We talked about

You ask  

“How did we fill up the hour?”

We talked of claiming power

to just say no

of holding reality in the privacy of

one’s mind – a mind shaped by fears, hopes,
 
and childhood understandings.

We talked of the cloak of past abuse which 

seems, at times, permanently attached 

to the body which balks at getting out of

bed.

We talked of blessings  while one continues

to bleed of the wound of the most devastating

loss of all – that of a child.

We talked of anger or rather letting go of 

the anger which hides the fear of losing the 

ability to protect oneself and returning…

Returning to that prison which disguises itself as

a honeymoon suite.

We talked  of life.

Sometimes well lived.  Sometimes not.

Lastly, we talked of God who we sometimes 

make into our own image - 

a god who judges and expects perfection. 

I do not think this is the same God who smiles with us.

We talked.


Written October 4, 2016

​Grandma says….

I was listening to Ted Talk by Bryan Stevenson – human rights lawyer – this Monday morning.  He talked about advice from his grandmother who was the daughter of former slaves.  He recounts that one morning she took him aside and said to him “Bryan, you are special. I want you to promise me three things: (1) Always love your mother, (2) always do the right thing even when it is hard, and (3) Do not drink alcohol.  There was a history of alcohol abuse in the family.   In the matriarchal household in which he grew up Grandma was the ultimate authority. 

Earlier this morning I had been thinking about my grandmother, Fanny Mae Pickett and some of her seeming wise sayings or reminders.    One of those sayings was “The hurrier I go the behinder I get.”   I thought of this particular one  because 76 I have yet to keep this sage reminder programed into the part of my brain which directs my actions.    One of the emails I got this morning was from my landlord who informed me that the envelope which was to contain the rent check arrived unsealed without the check.  Apparently I did not seal the envelope and the check fell out between the time it left my hands and was delivered to his address.  In my attempt to get everything done related to my recent move back to Wheeling I apparently did not seal the envelope.  I, of course,  had to laugh at myself while I simultaneously sighed and wondered how many times I needed to be reminded to slow down, cross all the Ts and dot all the Is.   My grandmother’s voice immediately shouted into my ear, “Jim how many times have I told you to slow down and do it right? What is the saying I told you to memorize?” 
I would immediately know she meant, “The hurrier I go the behinder I get.”   It seemed that I was always rushing to get a job done and not infrequently spilling something or forgetting something.  

I recall when my office building was next to Catholic charities which served a large homeless and near homeless population.   The homeless men and women would often greet me in the morning when I arrive and join me for a cup of coffee.   They would also bid me goodnight and not infrequently remind me to slow down.  One night I open the trunk of my car, threw in my briefcase and, inadvertently, my car keys.  Opening the trunk on that car did not unlock the car doors.  Of course, I efficiently, slammed the trunk with car keys securely locked inside. One of the men laughed at me and said, “The hurrier you go the behinder you get.”  Apparently we had the same grandmother.

I am terrible at editing any documents I create.  My fingers fly over the keys when I am creating a document.  Given the speed it is not surprising that the keyboard skills a letter  or prints the wrong one every now and then!   I tend to proofread at the same speed which results in practicing no editing!   People such as my dear friend and colleague Becky take pity on my and often edits documents for me. 

Another saying of my grandma Fannie was, “A penny saved is a penny earned.”    Grandma Fannie was very careful with finances.  If her husband, my Grandfather Ed, overspent his allowance she might loan him a nickel.  I swear she would loan him a nickel and keep a record of the transaction in “THE LEDGER”.  I can call up her voice saying, “Ed, you did not repay that nickel. You need to do this.”  I also recall going to see her where she worked as a seamstress in a little department store in Sapulpa, Oklahoma  after she and Grandpa Ed divorced and before they remarried.  Sometime on Saturday if we were in town shopping we would stop by to see  Grandma Fanny.  She would give each of us a quarter but not before  holding us hostage to listening to her “advice” about saving a percentage of that quarter.    Of course, we had no idea how little she was paid and what a sacrifice those quarters represented. 

My son did not have the advantage of a Grandma Fannie although his dad, me, did his best to pass along all the sage reminders he had received from Grandma Fannie and others. He would surely attest to my attempt to implant all of them in his brain!   Of course, as if true for all of us, he would have to pick and choose which ones to attend to.

Some of the most successful programs to create a more just world have involved the grandmother principle.  When there was an experiment to make computers accessible to rural places in India, the program included English grandmothers who would  praise the efforts of the children.    When young people spend time with  their elders in nursing homes or other places  both the elders and the young people do better in all areas of their lives.

Not all grandmothers are related by birth.  As was true with the homeless elders who would daily offer me sage advice, elders are ready to share the life lessons they have learned.  Whether it arrives in the form of a cross stitch wall hanging or couch pillow, via a Ted Talk, in a Maya Angelou poem or a talk by Ruby Sales, there is no shortage of elders who are willing to share what they have discovered to be the three (or more) most important life lessons.  Even though the current generation might be the wisest teachers of the use and possibilities of technology, the Grandma input will tell us what values technology needs to serve.   Grandma Fannie  insisted when we were at our house that the time after farm chores and dinner cleanup was to be used for intellectual and spiritual development.   One could read, write letters, play or study music for the two or three hours left in the day.  She would say, “We may wear out but we are not going to rust out.”

Elders do not need to retire.   They will, if we provide the opportunity, remind us that “The teacher is the student and the student is the teacher.”  

Written October 3, 2016

​Is religion a means or an end?

Since it is Friday, regular readers of my blog could predict that I would be listening to the podcast of the September 29, 2016 conversation Krista Tippet, host of On Being,  had with her guest.  Her guest for the 29th of September is the vary erudite, questioning, open Alain de Botton who “”is founder and chairman of The School of Life.   His books include Religion for Atheists and How Proust Can Change your Life.  His new book is a novel, The Course of Love.”  As a philosopher, teacher, author, seeker and a person raised by atheist parents, he came, on his own, to appreciate questions which religions, including Christianity, has sought to answer and the rituals which they have created to help insure both a sense of community and the setting aside of time and place to routinely re-examine and reaffirm what gives this brief life journey a mission.

On the surface, without the comfort of religious or spiritual beliefs encompassing one or many life journey and one or many universes, this life journey is devoid of meaning and purpose.  Consider, for example:

•    A sperm and an egg get together, play and may or may not decide to join forces to create another human being.
•    One is carried or not carried full term and is born alive or dead.
•    If born alive one, if lucky, is raised by people who provide the basics and the tools to function in whatever community or culture into which one is born
•    One somehow earns a living or is supported by the state, trust funds or whatever, buys stuff, and creates a home independently with other people.
•    Some will again introduce sperm and egg to create another being who will follow the same pattern.
•    One saves money, retires or keeps working, considers getting rid of some stuff but purchases other stuff such as adult diapers, implements to remove wandering hairs, supports the pharmaceutical industry and then dies
•    One is buried or cremated and, depending on the method, returns to dust to join other dust which, thankfully, does not procreate to create baby dust
•    Relatives then come in, keep a few “valuable pieces” and sell or consign the rest.
•    The new generation scours the consignment stores so they can accumulate stuff.
 
Obviously, there is much fluff added to this life journey but this, so to speak, is the bare bones which leads some of our neighbors, in either erudite, wordy books or in popular song form to ask Peggy Less’s question, “Is this all there is?”.

It is not surprising that humans have, even when basic survival needs consumed most of one’s time and energy, sought to posit some purpose to this journey.  Whether it was very playful, sexual, emotional Gods, the spirits,  a single being, humans have posited Gods who could be credited or blamed for this journey. Philosophers and theologians borrowed from each other and then often claimed exclusive rights to “the truth”.  They also posited certain views about humans.   Often the view was that humans were sinful creatures who could not be trusted to behave (whatever that meant) rationally or morally unless there was the promise of heaven or threat of hell.  The goal then became to please God or the Gods who had very human characteristics of using behavioral training techniques of reward and punishment.  Religions also often recognized the fact that, as humans, we were often very prone to the promises of the traveling medicine man/person (the prelude to the infomercial).   Thus, there were lofty, lovely houses of worship in which one could get back on track and enjoy the sounds, smells and general atmosphere of those things which feed the soul.  Churches and religious organizations also gave a sense of community and a place to continue to question the meaning of life in general or a particular life.

As Mr. de Botton so engagingly points out the intention and some of the concepts were indeed very necessary.  He has incorporated many of those same intentions, concepts and practices in The School for Life. That school borrows religious music and words such as soul and sermon.  It also is very attuned to a basic need of most humans – a community.      Individuals such as Mr. de Botton have recognized that, as an atheist one does not have to, as my grandmother might say, throw out the baby with the bathwater.  The baby in this case are the questions which is the ongoing means of coming together to explore what gives meaning, joy and purpose to this life journey.  The baby is also the question of ethics, moral codes or guidelines which might keep humans attuned to the fact that all action has a reverberating effect on the rest of the world and, perhaps, on the universes - those of which we have some knowledge of and those of which we have yet to learn.

In short, individuals such as Mr. de Botton can help us remember that when religion helps us explore essential issues of the purpose and the manner with how we live as individuals and as a community is serves a very important purpose. When, however, we confuse, the means of positing questions with an end product which is the only possible product we are in danger of creating exclusive, closed clubs which will destroy the very people who it sought to help.

In other words, religion is not sacred or the repository of “the truth” but a simple means to joyfully, lovingly, creatively explore who we are and who we want to become.

Written September 30, 2016

School Bells – Current Affairs – Grade 1 – Week 7
As always I am excited to meet with the first grade class. This week we are to discuss Susie’s concerns about whether we treat the trees mean and if they help us breathe. The students are arriving now.
Me: Good morning class.
Class: Good morning Mr. Jim Me: I hope everyone had a good week. Did you?
Class: Yes!
Sam: Do we have cookies Uncle Jim? Me: Yes, here is one cookie for everyone. Tara and Tommy will you pass them out please?
Tara and Tommy pass them out.
It does not take long before everyone has inhaled their cookie.
Me: Today we are discussing Susie’s concerns. Susie will you remind us what you concerns are?
Susie: I think we are mean to the trees. My brother says that they help us breathe and if we keep cutting them down to make houses we will not be able
to breathe. This week he said that trees talk to each other and other plants. Is that true?
Me: This sounds like an environmental issue. Does everyone know what the
word environment means?
Sofia: That means everything around us?
Me: Yes, that is the meaning. So that includes the trees, the animals, the air and everything.
Tommy: Even the ants?
Me: Yes, even the ants and the flies and everything.
Sue: Ugh!
Me: So, Sue question related to how parts of the environment help each other or if they help each other. She particularly wants to know about how our relationship with the trees.
Sam: That sounds funny Uncle Jim. It sounds like the tree is a person.
Me: Yes, we usually think of just having relationships with other people. Let’s get back to Sue’s question about how we treat trees and how they treat us. How do trees help us?
Ahmes: My mom said we get oxygen from trees and trees take in the bad stuff the car - stuff from cars.
Me: The carbon monoxide and other things that are bad for us.
Steve: That stuff you breathes when you get behind some cars. Makes me sick.
Me: Yes, that is the carbon monoxide or CO2. How well do trees help?
Tara: The provide shade.
Susie: We tie our hammock to them and take a nap.
Sam: They provide homes for birds and other animals.
Tommy: We have apple and pear trees. They give us food.
Sofia: Some of our house is wood but we have to cut them down. Is that mean Mr. Jim
Me: Good question Sofia. If we cut too much then it is not good for the trees or the environment.
Ahmes: If we cut all the trees they cannot help us breathe. S
usie: Do they talk to other plants?
Sam: We were listening to a program that said they do talk in a way to other plants and others plants and things talk to them. Do they speak Egyptian, Syrian or English Uncle Jim?
Me: That is funny Sam. Actually I read on a web site (ecology.com) Suzanne Simard, whose job is a forest scientist at the University of British Columbia and the people she works with have discovered that trees and plants do communicate with each other. There is web of fungi, sort of like our brains which allow them to talk back and forth. When one needs something they often share water or food.
Steve: Do our brains have fun. fung..
Me: Fungi Steve. We have parts of our brain that connect other parts. Trees and plants use a different material but it does the same thing.
Tommy: Don’t our brains have Wi-Fi?
Me: Oh that is good Tommy. No we have to have physical parts so allow the different parts to connect with each other and the same is true with plants and trees.
Sue: So it is not mean to cut some trees?
Me: No, actually, sometimes there are too many trees and we have to cut some of them so the others can live. If we put all the kids in this class in one little cardboard box none could live. Sometimes we can move trees but we have to take some of them out or their will not be enough food for any of them. On the other hand, if we take them all out, nothing does well.
Sofia: But if a family has too many children to feed we do not kill some of them.
Me: No, but we may need to help them or sometimes some of them go to live with another family member.
Tara: Can I talk to a tree?
Me: Well, yes and told. If we mistreat anything it affects everything else. Just think of what happens if one person in the class is mean to someone else in the class. Does it then feel bad for everyone? T
Tara: It is like you can feel it or if my mother and dad are in a bad mood when I come home from school I know right away.
Me: Perhaps that is the important lesson for today. Everything affects everything else. The trees helps us and other plants. Other plants help the trees and us. What we do affects the trees and the plants, everyone in the family and everyone in this class. Native American know that all the parts of the environment – plants, people, animals –are important. If you used a tree for wood, a canoe and something else you only took what you needed and you gave thanks for the tree. They believed that if they good care of everything in the environment it would take care of them. Do you think a family works the same way?
Sue: if we take care of each other we all do better?
Me: Very good Sue. Maybe after today every time we see a tree, a plant, or an animal we will think of them being our friend and talking to each other as well as sharing oxygen and other things with us. Good job everyone. Thanks. Steve and Sue would you hand out one more cookie to everyone? Next week we will talk about friendships. What are they? How do we feed them?
Class: Thanks Mr. Jim.
Everyone finishes their cookie.
Ring! Ring! Ring!
Me: have a wonderful week.

Written September 28, 2016 ​