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Sunday Musings - September 29, 2024

9/29/2024

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Sunday Musings - September 29, 2024
Housecleaning.
 
Housecleaning is the name of a poem by the United States poet Nikki Giovanni.  She begins the poem by stating, “I always enjoyed house cleaning.   She ends it with “And I find it must remove you from my life.”   One can easily google this poem.
 
I recently thought of this poem when I was sharing my spiritual intention for the day.  My intention was, “Clean out the garbage stored in my brain; the lies; the resentments; the judgements of others; the limits I place on myself and other harmful and non- essential data.”   
 
When we think of spiritual cleanliness we may not always consider what is stored in our brain; the source of what is stored in our brain; the fact checking we did or did not do before storing information; the fear which accompanied what is stored in our brain; the “what ifs”; the judgement of others; the shields we have put to avoid uncomfortable truths about ourselves and the world; or the toxic waste of substances we have put in our bodies such as excessive alcohol, caffeine, and processed food. 
 
The information we have stored in our brain and the toxic waste from unhealthy eating and drinking habits, the lack of exercise, the amount of emotional support determines the minute-by-minute decisions I make about how to live this brief life journey.   The brain, after all, is the command center of this journey.   If we hold on to toxic material which affect the mechanisms of my brain, we can daily articulate well-meaning spiritual intentions, but they will not become manifest reality. For example:
 
o   We may be holding on to lies about our self-worth based on the mistreatment of someone in the distant or recent past.  We may have internalized the lie that something was wrong with us; we somehow caused the abuse.  We have decided based on some well-meaning professional that we are damaged for life. There is nothing wrong with us.  We are not damaged for life although we may have scars.
 
o   We may be holding on to the false belief that all people are untrustworthy which is not true. Most are trustworthy.
 
o   We may be holding on to other false information which we have not sufficiently fact checked.
 
o   We may be storing judgment of others thinking that we are perfect, and others are flawed.  Obviously, we are all imperfect.
 
o   We may believe that our religious framework is the only right one and all others are wrong; all others are based on false prophets.
 
o   We may have labeled others as unworthy based on their religion, culture, immigration status, race, gender, sexual orientation or some other difference without knowing them or their circumstances.
 
o   We may be holding on to an “all or nothing” way of thinking about other people, places or events.
 
o   We may be allowing fear of other possible truths to keep us from growing/learning.
 
o   We may need someone to be perfect - a potential mate, a spouse, a parent, or a politician and not allow them to be the imperfect. human they are.
 
In this day of many means of collecting and storing information we may need to do a lot of fact checking before we decide what to believe or who to trust. We do not want to mistrust all information or people.  
 
Most of us are capable of fact checking the information in our brains or the information we may be considering storing in our brains.  Sadly, often we look only for information which reinforces the misinformation already stored in our brains.
 
Lies, misinformation, generalized fears, shame and a host of other beliefs or emotions can prevent us from spiritually being our best self.  We need to daily continue the process of cleaning our brains.  We also need to avoid people, places and things which may want to store unhealthy lies or misinformation in our brain.  This does not entail mistreating or judging others.   It may be enough to know that we are not able to stay healthy if there is not some protective barrier between us and some other people, places and things.  I can certainly pray for those who might cause me harm without judging them.   We may or may not know what factors such as addiction, other mental illness, or medical issues are affecting behavioral decisions of others
 
As is true for Nikki Giovanni, I enjoy house cleaning or at least I enjoy the results of house cleaning. I may find it temporarily inconvenient or even uncomfortable, but I seem to be at my best when my home and my brain are less cluttered with real or metaphorical dirt. 
 
Jimmy F Pickett
Written September 29, 2024
Coachpickett.org
 
 
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Sunday Musings - September 21, 2024

9/21/2024

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Sunday Musings — September 22, 2024
Love is inconvenient
 
Many of the major religions including Judaism, Christianity, Buddhism, Baha’i, Hinduism, Islam, Jainism, Sikhism, and Unitarian Universalists, among others, profess to teach that one should love one’s neighbor.  Yet, many, including some high-level politicians, religions clerics, teachers and others seem to make huge exceptions or rather redefine who is one’s neighbor, thus allowing them to demonize, kill and otherwise mistreat those who appear to be their neighbor.
 
In the United States a recent example of ‘non-neighbor neighbor” has to do with those labeled as immigrants. For the most part those labeled as immigrants to the United States prove to be those fleeing physical, emotional, religious and financial violence. Every study confirms that fewer immigrants commit offenses against their new neighbors than those who are citizens of the United States.  Yet many continue to demonize these “neighbors and threaten to forcibly send them back to violence and, in many cases, certain death.
 
The citizens of Springfield, Ohio have welcomed many from Haiti whose country continues to experience enormous poverty, political upheaval and violence. Most of those from Haiti in Springfield are proven to be there legally and are hardworking, good neighbors.   The mayor and other officials of Springfield have repeatedly confirmed that the Haitian neighbors are welcome. They have also repeatedly admitted that welcoming so many new neighbors at one time has strained their housing, educational, human services and other resources.  In short it has been very inconvenient to have so many new neighbors at once.  Yet most of Springfield welcomes them.
 
Most of us have experience with the reality that loving each other - loving one’s neighbors whether they are biological family, in laws, the spouses/partners of our children, our grandchildren or our physical neighbors - is often inconvenient. They may need our emotional or other support when we are, ourselves, exhausted; when our budget is stained or even when we are not feeling very warm and fuzzy towards other humans in general.  We may receive a call in the middle of the night informing us our neighbor’s house is on fire, flooded or otherwise not livable.  They may need to stay at our home for an indefinite time.  If we are parents, it is not convenient when our children are sick in the middle of the night, and we go without adequate sleep for several nights.  My friend’s sister-in-law died leaving a 12-year-old who needed to be cared for in his own home.  She reigned her job and lived separately from her husband until her nephew was ready to be on his own.  Many of we parents have children who are living with active addiction or other mental illness.  Loving them results in emotional and financial stress which may be very inconvenient.
 
There are many examples of love being inconvenient. It is interesting to me that in none of the religious teachings which command one to love one’s neighbors do I find exceptions. Sadly, religious teachers and their followers often are creative in replacing the term neighbor with such terms as “evil”, criminal, immigrant, a different political party, or some other non-neighbor label thus exempting they and their followers from this teaching to love one’s neighbors.  
 
If we only love when it is convenient is it love or self-interest? 
 
Those of us who are parents, educators, religious teachers or otherwise in the role of mentors may decide to take a moment to see if we are willing to love our neighbor (spouse, partner, children, person from another culture, or country) even when it is inconvenient or whether we want to continue the ruse of assigning new labels to our neighbors pretending as if that transforms them in the eyes of the God of our understanding to a non-neighbor.
 
Written September 22, 2024
Jimmy F Pickett
Coachpickett.org
 
 
 
 
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Sunday Musings - September 15,2024

9/15/2024

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Sunday Musings – September 15, 2024
 
As individuals, families, groups and even countries it seems we often use the term victim without considering the historical context in which events occurred.
 
There are, of course, instances when someone is a random victim.  One may just happen to be in the right place at the right time putting them in the path of a driver who runs a red light or in a school or shopping center where someone opens fire with an assault type weapon.  One might be hiking and suddenly find oneself in the path of an avalanche.  Some of us have found ourselves in the path of a tornado with little or no advance warning.  Many civilians often find themselves victims of a war which was initiated by individuals or a government they did not endorse or support.
 
On closer examination we may often discover decisions we had previously made were links in a chain of events leading up to the event of which we felt like a “victim”.
 
This past week in the United States many gathered on the 11th of September to remember and honor those who died on September 11, 2001 in the attacks in New York cities, the Pentagon and on the plane which was downed in Pennsylvania.  On the surface all who died were innocent victims.  Perhaps none of those who died had participated in foreign policy or political decisions which helped to fuel the violent thinking of the terrorists. Perhaps none had helped to spread anti- Muslim or other prejudicial or oppressive attitudes or policies.  Perhaps many had spoken up against such attitudes or policies. Perhaps few or none had participated in religious gatherings which claimed all gods except theirs was or is the false god.  Perhaps some had actively participated in organizations which embrace a diversity of gods and religious beliefs.  Some might have been actively working to end all emotional, financial, spiritual and self-serving violence.
 
On the other hand, perhaps many had not taken the time or had the courage to speak up against discriminatory or oppressive acts and words.
 
Martin Niemoeller, the German theologian who was arrested by the Gestapo and sent to Dachau in 1938 before being freed by the Allies 7 years later, is reported to have said:
 
         “In Germany the Nazis first came for the Communists and I didn’t speak up because I was not a communist. Then they came for the Jews and I didn’t speak up because i was wasn’t a Jew.  Then they came for the trade unionists and I didn’t speak  up because I wasn’t a trade unionist.  Then they came for the Catholics and I didn’t speak up because I was a Protestant.  Then they came for me and, by that time there was no one left to speak for me.”
 
Vera Brittain in her three volume Testament of Youth details some of the events leading up to the indescribable horror of the deaths inflicted by Hitler and many other German citizens.   She realized that terrible events such as these did not happen just because of the unresolved mental and emotional issues of one human; one human who was able to enlist the partnership of working men and woman and professionals including physicians, psychologists and many other health care profesionals.  Jay Lifton explored this phenomenon in the book, The Nazi Doctors; a exploration of how physicians and other health care professionals agreed to act as if hideously cruel behavior was consistent with their professional oaths.   Both of these authors, as well as others, have attempted to put Nazi atrocities in historical contexts; a historical context which includes how the Allies treated the Germans following World War I; a historical context which included the spreading of anti-Jewish sentiments by notables United States figures such as  Henry Ford; a history which included the adoption of the myths of a chosen people; myths that mentally challenged people contributed nothing to the community; the myths that same sex relationships were evil and against the will of the God of one’s understanding; the myth that once identified as a law breaker - a criminal – who got caught – one could never contribute anything to the body politic; the myth many other people who did not fit the prescribed norm as defined by such people as Hitler and his followers needed to be killed as if they were weeds which might kill off the crops if not destroyed.  
 
Whether one is examining the actions of a Hitler, Putin, Hamas, the perpetrators of 9/11, the gun violence adovates, mass shootings in the United States, racism, anti-Jewish sentiment, anti-Muslim sentiment or some of the amazing positive creations of we humans, all of humanity would benefit from the historical context out of which events are conceived and birthed.
 
Historically, in the United States we have excluded many facts in our history books; facts about racism, gender, sexuality, foreign policy and other important segments of our history. Until recently there was little acknowledgement of institutional racism and sexism; little mention of such events as the total legal destruction of the thriving Black Wall Street in Tulsa, Oklahoma, of  the broken treaties with indigenous tribes, or the role of organized religion in creating the glass ceiling.  In recent years many states have passed laws legalizing the return to redacting larges segments of racial history and the reality of gender identity and sexism.  If this pattern continues, we are doomed to being participants in the destruction of the Republic of the United States and perpetuation of the myth that we are not playing an active role in the planning of the demise of not only the United States, but the destruction of the sustainability of the planet.
 
If we continue to label individuals, groups, families and nations as victims without considering the historical context we will wring our hands and cry our way to obliteration.
 
Written September 15, 2024
Jimmy F Pickett
coachpickett.org
 
 
 
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Sunday Musings - September 8, 2024

9/7/2024

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Sunday Musings - September 8, 2024
 
Throw away people
 
It was with great sadness I read of another school shooting, another overdose death, another domestic violence incident, another incident of sexual abuse of young children, more war killings, another armed robbery, and of the many other ways we humans continue to treat each other as less than; of the inability of some to consider the rights and needs of their neighbors. 
 
I clearly understand the sadness, grief, anger and overall frustration of those who are victims of violent or other hurtful acts.   I can only imagine the grief of family members, friends and colleague of those who are victims of fatal violent acts.
 
At the same time, I do not understand why, given our increased knowledge of some of the factors which affect the neurological functioning of the human brain, we continue to believe that punishment of those who are unable to consider the right and needs of each other is going to result in a more loving and just society.
 
It is no secret our jails and prison system are created for punishment.  Despite a few rehabilitation programs within the prison system, anyone who has worked or lived in such a system knows the system is designed to destroy those who are sentenced to them.  There are those who do manage to use the time in prison to reflect on their behavior and design a new, path for themselves. There are employees of judicial system and the prisons who treat the inmates with love and respect.    My ex-wife, several of my colleagues, and others I know and admire have and do work within the prison system and treat the inmates with love and respect.   Sadly, this is the exception, rather than the rule.
 
Often, from the time a person whose arrest and charge are reported in local news outlet it seems as if the decision has been made to treat them as a non- person, as a throw away person.  Seldom, when I read or listen to a news report, do I sense an awareness that the accused is deserving of love and support; that the accused is the son or daughter, the aunt or uncle, the mother, dad, or neighbor who is deserving of love and support.  Seldom do I read or hear of the fact that this person has been “unable” to consider the rights and needs of others.  
 
We live in a culture in which it is considered normal and moral to use emotional, judicial, and military violence in response to violence or other behavior we deem unacceptable.  We label others as enemies and deserving of our judgement.  Even though we make efforts to resolve some “situations” diplomatically, often, as is the case with Israel, Ukraine and other countries, we supply many lethal weapons.  Violence and threats of violence often seems to be our go to approach.
 
If a private citizen decides he or she has a right to use violence we either applaud the action as self-defense or vilify the person as deserving of punishment.  Thus, the 14-year-old school shooter, Colt Gray, is being charged as an adult with murder. So is his father, Colin Gray, who allowed his son to have weapons despite apparent mental health issues.  A 19-year-old young man, Robert Thompson, is sentenced to 19 years in prison for a robbery shooting incident in the parking lot of local restaurants. I have no idea how many years Robert might serve; perhaps less with time off for good behavior; perhaps more for behavior while in prison attempting to survive.
 
I could list many other examples of throw away people I read about in the local newspapers or hear about on local, national or international news reports.
 
Many of those throw away people will return again and again to prison.  Our recidivism rate in the United States is somewhere between 45 and 82 percent depending on which source one believes.  It is one of the highest in the world.  Clearly the system is not “rehabilitating” despite some classes, other program, and some very dedicated teachers, counselors, physicians and guards.   The system is designed to dehumanize the inmates and the staff.  
 
Punishment does not work for those who are mentally ill or for those who for other reason are UNABLE to consider the right and needs of others.  It does not work for anyone.
 
Regardless of one’s religious beliefs one can appreciate the teaching of Jesus, the Buddha and many others who challenge us to love our enemies (making them non-enemies), focusing on removing the log in our own eye rather than the spec in the eye of our neighbor, nurturing others and ourselves, accepting the complicated nature of our thought process; accepting there are no throw away humans, 
 
The person who is reading this and disagrees is not a throw away human.  The person who is reading this and agrees is not a throw away human.  Neither Colt Gray, as terrible as his action was, nor his father are throw away humans.  The persons with an addiction to alcohol, other drugs, food, gambling, power, sex, or even sexual activity with a young child are not throw away humans.    That are those who are dangerous and need to be in a secure facility receiving professional and loving treatment.
 
Those of us who follow research know negative treatment does not create positive outcomes.  Treating others as throw away people does not result in healthy, contributing community members.
 
Written September 8, 2024
Jimmy F Pickett
coachpickett.org
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Sunday Musings - September 1, 2024

8/31/2024

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Sunday Musings - September 1, 2024
 
If we are human, we have hurt others; sometimes in a reactionary way to a real or perceived danger; sometimes planned.  When a hurtful action appears planned it would seem as if the person had a choice.
 
Justice systems in most countries, including the United States, are based on the belief that one has chosen to injure another physically, sexually, emotionally or financially.   Most, if not all, religions are based on the belief that the God who is the head of a particular religion rewards or punishes believers on the basis of their choices.  There may be differences in the beliefs in what behavior is offensive to a God, but the basic model of justice is the same. 
 
We imprison a great many people in the United States because we believe they made a choice to engage in behavior which was hurtful or unjust to another person, community or some other part of the world.
 
In the United States we are extremely adept in holding two competing beliefs.   We believe that mental illness is real and believe all people make choice.  Thus, a great many people with a diagnosed mental illness, including addiction, are in prison.  Although there are some loving medical professionals serving some prisoners, the basic goal of prison is to punish individuals for making bad choices.
 
What if, however, the development and function of the brain is much more complicated?  What if mental illness is real.  “Mental” implies that the brain is involved.  If the brain is involved than the ability to make decisions is affected.  Actually, as I have previously suggested, the distinction between mental and physical is inaccurate.   It is all physical.  A great many parts of the brain have to function in a certain manner in order for a person to make a decision to act.  If any of those parts are impaired or do not communicate well with other parts than one may be unable to access moral or ethical core values; to make a decision in line with those values.  
 
All of us, I am sure, have found that we are more prone to react rather than act when we are tired or not feeling well.  To react is to rely on instincts which generally mean fight or flight.   We may also find we react rather than act when a past trauma is triggered. 
 
We have undoubtedly noticed the brain for some of us is able to remember certain situations and call up a previous response which we then label as a habit    One might talk about habits which are one’s muscle memory.   Thus, in combat, when flying an airplane or engaging in any repeated behavior one may not “think” but do what one has trained oneself to do. One may have noticed that sometimes one “finds” oneself performing an act one had not intended.   For example, if one drives daily or often to a specific location one might intend to drive someplace else and suddenly find oneself at the frequent location.
 
 
 
Sections of the brain which allow one to evaluate a situation and make a decision based on one’s core values are not developed in a young child.   The child also has not internalized core values. The young child reacts with no ability to consider the rights and needs of others.   Authors such as Gabor Mote in his book The Myth of Normal:  Trauma, Illness and Healing in a Toxic Culture suggest that when a child experiences trauma before those parts of the brain are developed it may reduce or hinder the development of brain circuits which allow one the flexibility to make decisions or make choices.  We also know genetics, birth defects, nutrition and other factors affect the development of the brain.   Scientists are researching how a range of other factors may affect the development of the brain and other functions of the body. Screen time, environmental factors, food dyes, war and many others are being examined.
 
Some such as Gabor Mote and Resmaa Menakem (My Grandmother’s Hands: Racialized Trauma and the Pathways to Mending Our Hearts and Bodies)  suggest specific exercises or techniques which one can use to diminish the affect of trauma; even multigenerational trauma.  We know the human body may, at times, be capable of healing.  Some early damage may not be repairable.   One thinks of the many young children living in war torn countries or regions and who have little or no access to food, water or other necessities.   How permanent is their damage?  Many of we health care professional are also familiar with acute mental illness which may be treated, but which leave one vulnerable or restricts one’s functioning one’s entire life.  There are, of course, the exceptions. Some children survive acute trauma and, yet, become highly competent judges, doctors, scientists and other professionals.  
 
The bottom line is that although we know a lot more about “mental” illness and healing from trauma and deprivation, there is much left to learn.  We do know that “choice” is not simple or possible for many individuals. The human brain is dependent on many factors in order to be able to “decide” to act rather than act.  Assuming that everyone is equally able to make a choice to act in a way which considers the needs of others as well as mother earth is profitable for some religious leaders and for industries such as the jail/prison industrial complex.  Such assumptions also make good sound bites for politicians. They are not consistent with what we know about how the human brain functions. Perhaps, if some of us have brain circuitry which have developed to be able to make choices, we can choose to be guided by science, common sense and yes, “love” of others which it turns out is also love of self.
 
Written September 1, 2024
Jimmy F Pickett
coachpickett.org
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 





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Sunday Musings - August 25, 2024

8/25/2024

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Sunday Musings – August 25, 2024


I was never a fan of censorship. This includes the current surge in the effort to ban certain books in schools and public libraries. While I worry about attempts to spread misinformation, I worry even more about not trusting children and teachers to select material children and adults are ready to read and evaluate om their own.  I also worry about the move to pretend as if racism has not been a part of our history or acting as if withholding information about gender and sexuality will add to the health of students.  My experience is children read or explore what they are ready to learn.  Anyone who has raised or taught children know they will let one know when one attempts to give them information than they are not ready to learn.  If, however, one deliberately limits access to the reality of history, science, or other subject areas one is merely brainwashing which is disrespectful and dangerous.
 
If I am going to talk about disrespect it is incumbent on me to attempt to articulate a definition other of respect. 
 
What might be considered respect by many of us?  Perhaps the readier of this blog might agree that to have respect for another person, animal or another part of our environment is to honor the fact we live in an interdependent world or universe.  That is to suggest that every action or inaction affects the entire universe (s).  If that is the case than one must agree that to treat someone or something with disrespect is to act as if one can ignore its importance or the fact that they or it is a gift for which to be grateful.   Many so-called primitive groups of people give some of what they are about to eat or drink back to the earth as a symbol of gratitude as a symbol that one must feed and water the earth if it is to continue to feed one.   Thus, whether taking about plants or animals which may be the source of nourishment, one should gratefully take only what one needs.  One can, of course, debate whether it is moral to kill animals for our human consumption.  One might decide it is immoral to kill an animal for food or one might argue that how one treats the living animal prior to killing is moral or immoral.  Whatever one decides about that issue respect demands that we treat all of creation as important.  One might then agree cannot pretend how one treats another person, the earth itself or animals will not long ter, affect all.  We can, perhaps, forgive humans for making past decisions based on lack of the tools of science or knowledge, but once we have knowledge of we must take responsibility for our actions.
 
One might suggest that to treat another person, animal or plant with respect is to act in self-interest. If, in fact all is interdependent then the negative or abusive treatment of another person, plant or animal affects the entire universe which must then come back to negatively affect the one who originated the negative act.  That seems to be to be axiomatic. 
 
Almost all of us have access to the effect of climate change, to the reality that gender is not, for many, as clear and fixed as we once believed, race and nationality does not determine intelligence or worth, sexual orientation does not determine parenting skills, there is no shortage of sperm for most,  sexuality is fluid in most of nature, there is no justification for lethal killing of others, events do not happen in a vacuum; treating other people or countries as if they exist only for one’s immediate gratification , focusing on the spec in the eye of the neighbor instead of the log in one’s own, and ignoring the limits of resources has dire long term consequences.  Pretending otherwise to children or adults serves no one; is respectful, unkind, cannot be justified.
 
Respect should not be a political or religious issue.  Respect is essential to the future of this planet; to the opportunity for all of nature, including we humans of all ages, to thrive.
 
Written August 25, 2024
Jimmy F Pickett
coachpickett.org
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Sunday Musings - August 18, 2024

8/17/2024

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Sunday Musings - August 18, 2024
It often seems as if many, if not most, of we humans have a difficult time connecting the dots; connecting how events or actions affect and are affected by each other.  Events and actions do not happen in a vacuum. If one does action “A” then one must address or take into consideration the effects of such actions on B to Z.
I was thinking of this as I read an article in the local newspaper about President Biden’s intention to permit the approximately 100000 dreamers (children brought to the United States illegally as children) to enroll in the Affordable Care Act health insurance next year. Fifteen states so far have joined together to file a federal lawsuit against such a rule.
 
 
 
 
(One can google this and find the story on various news sites). 
I find this fascinating. The purpose of this suit seems inconsistent with the stated ethical beliefs of many of these same attorney generals.  The facts as I understand them are:
o   The wife of the Republican candidate for president is an immigrant as are her parents.
o   The wife of the Republican vice President nominee is an immigrant and is a Sikh
o   Both Trump and Vance as well as many politicians and public officials profess to deeply care about:
§  Embryos3 from the time the sperm and egg meet.
§  Biological parents of children no matter what their mental, emotional or spiritual health.
§  The teachings of Jesus.
§  The economy and how it affects the biological parents and children.
 
At the very same time many of these same individuals seem to not:
o   Understand or care that the parents who enter this country after arduous journeys and leaving all they know do so because of their concern for their children whom they want to be able to feed, clothe, provide a safe home, and a chance for a decent future,
o   Favor childcare assistance.
o    Be concerned about the effect of failing to provide for the health care of children.
o   Appreciate that many of these same children and their parents have contributed to the economy of this country often doing back breaking jobs others do not want to do.
To want to take responsibility for the fact that policies of the United States have often affected the environment, economy and the safely of home communities/countries of immigrants - legal and illegal.
o   Becoming a legal citizen of this country especially if one is not the spouse or child of a citizen or is not well connected politically is an arduous process which under the best of circumstances can take an average of ten years.
o   Seem to accept the reality that just because sone people can overcome great hardships many factors which we may not fully comprehend allow some such as VP candidate Vance and others to climb out of the holes of poverty, addiction, violence and other trauma.
o   Providing health care for children will cost local, state and federal government less than not providing it.
o   Be concerned a disproportionate share of childcare still falls upon women in the United States.
o   Know we are a country of immigrants.
o   Know that study after study show immigrants - legal and illegal - commit fewer crimes than those who are already United Citizens. (Goodie many sources to verify this fact.)
If one is willing to connect the dots it should be a no brainer to ensure that heath care for all - citizens, legal immigrants and those forced to become illegals - is a wise investment economically, emotionally and spiritually.  Treating each other well pays positive dividends nationally and internationally.   It is time for common sense and basic decency to dictate political, economic and health care decisions in this country.
If one states that they care about children who eventually, if lucky, become adults, then one must care about their care from conception to the “natural” end of their life journey.
Written August 18, 2024
Jimmy F Pickett
Coachpickett.org
 
 
 
 
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Sunday Musings, August 11, 2024

8/11/2024

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​Sunday Musings - August 11, 2024


Small blessings


I daily write down and share a spiritual intention with several friends.   As I age my spiritual intentions are more focused on what is possible today.  I am increasingly aware this life journey is very brief.  I always “knew” this but at my age I am reminded in real time. We only have this moment to savor the gifts this journey.   These gifts include the many gifts of Mother Nature and the moments with friends - long term friends, new friends and those momentary encounters which may or may not be repeated and may or may not result in ongoing friendships


My friend Kurt and I have a generous, loving friendship of many years.  I appreciate much about him and our friendship, one of which is his willingness to be present for those unexpected moments with people with whom he has no history and who he may never again encounter.  These encounters are free of expectations or any need other than to appreciate the thin slice of each other which is apparent in that moment.   They are enough in and of themselves.  He and I share the joy and gift of such encounters.  We also share a similar joy for such moments with much of Mother Nature, a creation of art whether created by a person or Mother Nature.  This could be a painting, a dance, music, a flower or other plant, the miracle revealed by physics or engineering or the sudden appearance of the city of Pittsburgh as it opens its arms when one exits the Ft. Pitt tunnel at night.  Seemingly the lights of the city all turn on at once.  


When I allow myself to be present and let go of expectations or need for more, I can daily enjoy many such moments.   One of those moments occurred this week when I entered a space where a home inspector, I had hired was inspecting a condo I had planned to purchase.  He said I looked familiar, but I could not remember meeting him.   He later remembered we had met some time ago when he was with another person, we both know.   As we began talking, we discovered we shared similar interests in people and the world in which we live.  A delightful and energetic conversation ensued while he also shared the results of his inspection.   Soon it was time for me to leave and to decide that there were too many potential issues with the condo to consider a purchase.  That was disappointing and required me notifying several people who were going to help make this potential move possible - the bank employees, the movers, the painter.  Yet the experience filled me with joy and appreciation for this person as a fellow human and a competent and kind professional.  The cost of the inspection financially was money well spent and the visit was a gift.   While at this building I also had a moment with a woman I usually see only at social justice events.  As a neighbor she would have been another gift.  I might not see the inspector or the potential neighbor again.   If I do that will be a blessing. If not the value of the gifts of those moments is not lessened.


I could make a long list of such moments; Visits with Penny and the magical garden she and her partner join with Mother Nature and the fairies to create; moments with various people I may only see at the gym. moments with those I have the honor of sharing a healing journey; moments with colleagues; moments  with the owners of a nearby gathering place - a restaurant; moments savoring a particularly good meal; moments at theater productions; moments visiting neighbors while shopping at the green grocer or the supermarket; moments with a scientist I see at Panera’s generous enough to share something of his work; moments sharing sadness, joy, passion, delight, disappointment  and sometimes profound grief and even anger about how  badly we can treat each other.   Moments.


We exist only when we show up for such moments. They are enough.


Written August 11, 2024
Jimmy F Pickett
coachpickett.org’å
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Sunday Musings - August 4, 2024

8/3/2024

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Sunday Musings - August 4, 2024
 
Abuse is abuse is abuse whether that abuse is verbal, emotional, physical, political or sexual.  Abuse is always an instance of someone treating another person or group as less than; as an object to service the needs of the other; an instance of a person being unable to consider or accept the sacredness - the rights - of another.  Abuse is not caused by the person being abused.  It is about the perceived need of the abuser to avoid a pain or painful truth about oneself; the truth of their unresolved pain.  Very frequently the pain the abuser is avoiding or running from originates from them being told or convinced they are not enough; they are not worthy of love and respect.   Thus, the abuser may come to believe that they can relieve their pain by causing others pain. They may believe if they can degrade or otherwise injure another that they will gain worth by proving that they are more powerful.  They may come to believe that if they find a surrogate for their abuser, they can cause more hurt than they feel. They may believe in that way they can change the balance of power and thus protect themselves from further hurt. Often the abuser is unaware of why they are doing what they are doing.  They merely strike out in response to their need to avoid their own panic.   Perhaps they do not even label their pain as pain.  They may be so distant from the source of their own pain or fear they have come to believe that the danger to themselves and/or their family is a racial or religious group or even the history of the treatment of a group. 
 
A theoretical orientation about race which has been codified as the critical race theory has been designed to assuage the perceived discomfort of Caucasians if they must face the reality of racism in this country, the reality of their privileged status.  Many states have passed laws outlawing what is being terms critical race theory. Some of these laws specifically ban the teaching of the history of racism in the United Sates.
 
Some states have also banned or made it illegal to teach about gender, sexual orientation and/or other facts about who we are humans so that some students and many parents do not have to face the reality of who we are as humans.  This reality may conflict with religious or cultural beliefs.
 
Facing our discomfort, no matter what the source, can result in increased discomfort for some.  It can also long term free us to live in community and claim the joy of freedom; the freedom to love and live in harmony with one another; the freedom to work together to create a more loving relationship with each other and mother earth.  Avoid the discomfort of growth leads to abuse of others.
 
Abuse, whether it be physical, emotional, intellectual, spiritual, political or financial can steal the joy of the abuser and the abused.  Often in our attempt to empathize with the abused we may also steal their joy.   We may forget that one response to abuse, in addition to pain, is to hold on to our joy. 
 
In March of 2022, Ketanji Brown Jackson was the subject of confirmation hearings for the position of judge of the Supreme Court of the United States.  Some Senators questioning her attempted to discredit not only her judicial qualifications but her integrity as a person.  One of the most memorable speeches that day was made by Senator Booker. One sentence reminded all who were listening and all who later heard or read the speech, “Nobody’s going to steal that joy.”  He was reminding himself, Ms. Jackson and all her abusers that no amount of abuse can destroy the hope and the joy of those who have endured abuse since racism was invented to justify the unfathomable cruelty of slavery.   Those slaves and descendants have survived and often thrived by holding on to joy while not denying the pain.  Whether working in the fields, caring for the children of their white masters, cooking, cleaning and even dressing the while slave owners, the slaves - the black men, women and children - sang, took care of each other and kept the focus on the promise of the God of their understanding.  Even today in any African American church service or at wakes on can witness deep grief alongside the joy of the belief “We shall overcome.”   
 
One can, as one listens, hear the assurance of Richard Wright’s Bigger Thomas expressing in Native Son, when being threatened by the police persons, “You cannot do nothin but kill me and that ain’t nothin.”
 
We cannot as individuals or a country survive by running from or denying abuse; the abuse of racism, sexism, homophobia, trans oppression, outlawing choice, the attachment to guns, the withholding of health care or any other attempt to limit “all people” to “some people.  We also cannot survive if we succumb to giving away the twin of grief which is joy.
 
Written August 4, 2024
Jimmy F Pickett
coachpickett.org
 
 
 
 
 



 
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Sunday Musings - July 28, 2024

7/28/2024

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 Sunday Musings  - July 28, 2024
 
I am fascinated with the attempt of we humans to invent theories of our worth by envisioning gods which elevate us to a position which is superior to all which exist.  Even when the gods we create offer a playful relationship, humans have a special or elevated position.
 
In the United States many of the Europeans brought with them the Christian god who according to their sacred scriptures:
 
“And God said, let us make man in our image, after our likeness: and let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the birds of the heavens, and over the cattle, and over all the earth, and over every creeping thing that creepeth upon the earth.” https://www.bible.com
Genesis 1:26-31 Share - Bible.com
 
The Jewish sacred text begins the same.  
 
As the United States grew welcoming immigrants and bringing others as slaves or indentured servants many brought other religious beliefs.
 
The Native Americans as well as immigrants from indigenous tribes in various parts of the world often posited God or Gods who had a more synchronistic relationship with humans, Mother Nature and all which exists.   The following poem illustrates that relationship. 
 
 
 
Indigenous Americans: Spirituality and Ecos
AUTHOR Jack D. Forbes
 
An ancient Ashiwi (Zuñi) prayer-song states :
That our earth mother may wrap herself
In a four-fold robe of white meal [snow]; . . .
When our earth mother is replete with living waters,
When spring comes,
The source of our flesh,
All the different kinds of corn
We shall lay to rest in the ground with the earth mother’s
living waters,
They will be made into new beings,
Coming out standing into the daylight of their Sun father, to
all sides
They will stretch out their hands.
(Ruth Bunzel, “Introduction to Zuni Ceremonialism,” Forty-Seventh Annual Report, Bureau of American Ethnology (Washington: Government Printing Office, 1932), 483–486)
Some humans have posited either all is sacred, or nothing is sacred.  Other have suggested that just as “one cannot step into the same river twice” (Heraclitus) the essence of al is more than the individual parts.   When I ask the river the nature of its essence it replies that it is all its parts and more than its parts.  It is not the water, bed, or banks since all of these are constantly changing, constantly in the state of becoming.  Yet there is an essence we name the river.
We humans also have an essence which is more than our individual parts; more than our achievements; more than our physical bodies and more than our thoughts or emotions.  Our actions are affected by and affects all which exists at any one moment, but they alone are not our essence.  Just as with the river we are constantly in the process of becoming.  We have an essence which is more than our individual parts and is not separate from all the rest of the universe.  If we humans bit by bit destroys the earth, we cease to exist.
 Many visions of healing/growing include the concept of connectedness.  It is thought by many that death is both the state of disconnectedness and opening to reconnecting.   Many healers would maintain that to heal - to reclaim one’s essence - one must die unto a reconnection with the universe. It is interesting that in some religions one must be baptized - symbolically cleansed with/rejoined with water.
Paradoxically our attempt to have dominion over all the earth is resulting in our physical, emotional and spiritual death as well as the death of the planet.
 
No one “knows” God.  We humans are not God.  Perhaps there is no God which gives humans dominion over all that is. There may be a God who/which exists as the whole; a God which invites each of us to embrace our essence; an essence which cannot have dominion over other people, the earth, the birds, the cattle, every creeping thing but coexist as part of the whole.
Written July 28, 2024
Jimmy F Pickett
coachpickett.org
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    Jimmy Pickett is a life student who happens to be a licensed counselor and an addiction counselor. He is a student of Buddhism with a background of Christianity and a Native American heritage.

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