Honesty - priorities
I was talking with someone this morning who “forgot” to do their daily meditation. Many of us may often hear ourselves saying that we forgot to do something we know we need to do to stay healthy or to stay on track. We may forget that we have bills and spend as if we have extra money. We may forget dates such as our wedding anniversary, the birthday of a friend, our children or a partner. If we are a male and have a female spouse we may have become dependent on her for taking care of such details as birthday cards, gifts or other aspects of the emotional and spiritual life of the family. If we are in a same sex relationship, frequently one partner will assume that responsibility. We may decide that we are just “no good at those sorts of things” although we can remember many details related to our work.
If one is concerned enough about frequent forgetting one might see a physician and/or therapist to try to figure out the reason. The health care professional may ask what system we are using to remember tasks at work and at home. We may reply “I have never had to use a system.” or “I was depressed.” or “I was too busy.”
Some of these “reasons” may or may not be true, but the likely truth is that one did not have a system or remembering to do what one said was important. Perhaps one just did not feel like doing a particular task and may have avoided telling either ourselves or others the truth. The likely truth is that one made a decision that the task was not important enough to do or was not important enough to put on one’s calendar or whatever system one uses to remember important tasks.
Once we establish a “sacred” routine one may not normally need a reminder on one’s google calendar or whatever system one is using. If one changes one’s routine, however, one may need a reminder. Recently, I was driving late at night and did not take my evening medication. I knew I would be driving late and I knew I should set an alarm on my phone, but I choose not to take the time to do that. Since I take my medication as scheduled 99.9 % of the time as directed, this was not particularly important. It was, however, important to remind myself to be honest about how I made that decision. I always need a reminder if I make any significant changes in my schedule. On that same trip, I did make a very clear decision to postpone doing my morning spiritual practices until later in the morning. I did stop and do them when I had committed to do so.
When one is making changes in one’s life and is not able to practice a regular routine or wants to change the routine one needs to be very intentional. One cannot rely on some automatic alarm going off in one’s head.
There are times when one wants or needs to be more flexible. One then has to decide when one will do those holistic health care habits or other important tasks.
It is very dangerous to decide that one will wait until it is convenient or until one feels like doing important tasks. This applies to both work tasks and non-work tasks.
I talk to many people who do not exercise, pray or meditate daily, eat at least 3 to six healthy meals a day, schedule dates with their partner, children or other friends, or even make and adhere to a budget. They talk as if life is just happening to them. Certainly, I can relate to that feeling. There was a time when it felt as if life was just happening to me. Yet, I was making decisions to allow that; to not be assertive about what I wanted or needed.
Honesty is a major piece of health care. One makes decisions every day about what is important and allots time and energy accordingly. Taking responsibility for those decisions and the result of those decisions will, in the long run, give one great satisfaction.
The 12 step recovery programs advocates honesty, open mindedness and willingness (the HOW of the program) All of us can, I believe, benefit from practicing that HOW in our daily life.
Jimmy F. Pickett, LPC, AADC
I was talking with someone this morning who “forgot” to do their daily meditation. Many of us may often hear ourselves saying that we forgot to do something we know we need to do to stay healthy or to stay on track. We may forget that we have bills and spend as if we have extra money. We may forget dates such as our wedding anniversary, the birthday of a friend, our children or a partner. If we are a male and have a female spouse we may have become dependent on her for taking care of such details as birthday cards, gifts or other aspects of the emotional and spiritual life of the family. If we are in a same sex relationship, frequently one partner will assume that responsibility. We may decide that we are just “no good at those sorts of things” although we can remember many details related to our work.
If one is concerned enough about frequent forgetting one might see a physician and/or therapist to try to figure out the reason. The health care professional may ask what system we are using to remember tasks at work and at home. We may reply “I have never had to use a system.” or “I was depressed.” or “I was too busy.”
Some of these “reasons” may or may not be true, but the likely truth is that one did not have a system or remembering to do what one said was important. Perhaps one just did not feel like doing a particular task and may have avoided telling either ourselves or others the truth. The likely truth is that one made a decision that the task was not important enough to do or was not important enough to put on one’s calendar or whatever system one uses to remember important tasks.
Once we establish a “sacred” routine one may not normally need a reminder on one’s google calendar or whatever system one is using. If one changes one’s routine, however, one may need a reminder. Recently, I was driving late at night and did not take my evening medication. I knew I would be driving late and I knew I should set an alarm on my phone, but I choose not to take the time to do that. Since I take my medication as scheduled 99.9 % of the time as directed, this was not particularly important. It was, however, important to remind myself to be honest about how I made that decision. I always need a reminder if I make any significant changes in my schedule. On that same trip, I did make a very clear decision to postpone doing my morning spiritual practices until later in the morning. I did stop and do them when I had committed to do so.
When one is making changes in one’s life and is not able to practice a regular routine or wants to change the routine one needs to be very intentional. One cannot rely on some automatic alarm going off in one’s head.
There are times when one wants or needs to be more flexible. One then has to decide when one will do those holistic health care habits or other important tasks.
It is very dangerous to decide that one will wait until it is convenient or until one feels like doing important tasks. This applies to both work tasks and non-work tasks.
I talk to many people who do not exercise, pray or meditate daily, eat at least 3 to six healthy meals a day, schedule dates with their partner, children or other friends, or even make and adhere to a budget. They talk as if life is just happening to them. Certainly, I can relate to that feeling. There was a time when it felt as if life was just happening to me. Yet, I was making decisions to allow that; to not be assertive about what I wanted or needed.
Honesty is a major piece of health care. One makes decisions every day about what is important and allots time and energy accordingly. Taking responsibility for those decisions and the result of those decisions will, in the long run, give one great satisfaction.
The 12 step recovery programs advocates honesty, open mindedness and willingness (the HOW of the program) All of us can, I believe, benefit from practicing that HOW in our daily life.
Jimmy F. Pickett, LPC, AADC
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